Monday, October 31, 2011

Misheard Lyrics

It's a late night you're half asleep listening to music and suddenly you need to do a double take on what you just heard. Believe me it's happened to the best of us.

Anyways, that silly little intro leads into the following misheard lyrics on my part.

I know what your thinking Lollipop by f(x) ... oh god... but you only need to listening to the first couple seconds to hear the lyrics.



Crappy song but here is what I keep hearing in the intro:

"What you gonna play now"
"Whatever I play its got to be f*cked up"
"One, two, three, naked"
"One, two, three, naked"
"One, two, three, naked"


And suddenly SM takes on a whole new meaning.

What do you guys hear? And why not share some of your misheard english lyrics in idol/or not idol songs.

Question of the Week 17 HALLOWEEN SPECIAL

Alright, kiddies! Today is a Halloween special question here on Anti Kpop-Fangirl!

If you could dress up as any idol, who would you be and why?

Examples include, but are not limited to:
- "A plastic bag so I would be as pretty as Bom"
- "A mannequin to look as sexy as G.NA"
- "Why, Heechul! I'm a girl anyways. I don't even have to dress up!"
- "A cloud of smoke. Don't worry, it doesn't have to look good cause they'll never find me (G-Dragon) trippin' balls inside of it anyways."

In other Halloween related news:
A pastor in my country decided to start something called "JesusWeen ... a non profit organization also known as JesusWin". Essentially, houses "[hand] out Bibles, Christian post cards or tracts instead of treats [to Trick-or-Treat-ers], ... [and] participants are encouraged to wear white as a symbol of purity".

Just lol. Nothing against religion, but I love the whole idea of: "we can't teach our children to be beggars and vagabonds and liars! Dressing up as vile demons and going around taking people's food! If they want to dress up, make your kids friendly costumes. Not whore-witches".


If anyone has suggestions for later Question of the Weeks, please send them to zomg.oppa.sareanghae@gmail.com. Thanks!

Sunday, October 30, 2011

Hyosung is Korean Miley Cyrus


I was going to put up a Miley pic for comparison but I've already been subjected to this horror and I didn't need another. You all know damn well what Miley looks like. She looks like this.

T-ara's Round & Round



So, T-ara performed Round & Round on this music show. This is the song they were thinking of making a comeback with, but they opted for a more modern sound with their comeback (supposedly. No one knows what goes through Kim Kwang Soo's peanut brain.) Right off the bat you'll notice that Hyomin is missing, as she is busy in Gyebaek, both as her human character and being the main horse the characters ride on. Hyomin is working hard, but don't worry Hyomin, you're at best leading the group when you're absent.

Despite the lipsyncing, I'm convinced that only Soyeon, Eunjung, and Hyomin sing in this song. Jiyeon and Qri lipsync Hyomin's parts and Boram lipsync one of Soyeon's lines. Normally, those three not singing would bring me the utmost joy. Usually. There is one thing better in the song: the lack of Hwayoung. That's the ultimate present a composer could give to anyone: the lack of the most hated member in a song. What makes it even better is that she was in the back or to the side most of the time in the choreography, and the one time she was in the middle, the camera zoomed out. Even the cameraman doesn't like her.

Oh yeah, the first part of T-ara's ~1 million dollar MV will be out within the next couple days. Kim Kwang Soo should spend that on, oh, I don't know, songs or something.

Okay Jaejoong.



He's finally come out of the closet, nice. I guess SNSD's 'GIRLS BRING THE BOYS OUT!' is working wonders for closet cases like Jaejoong.

Yunjae worshipping tards rejoice!

Always keep the faith fist, in your mouth...not up the other destination. Eww.

Friday, October 28, 2011

''Ooooooooohhh  SHINee Touched My Tralala, Mmmmmmmm My Wing Ding Dong.''

Yup, Jonathan Ross hums to that while masturbating.

He's a famous UK Television & radio host (his ep. with Lady Gaga was fucking hilarious), mostly known for his hit talk show 'Friday Night With Jonathan Ross'. I love this man but...


HWAT TEH UFCK?


Miryo's "friend" Joora fucks her over.


Joora of Honey Family, that is. That group sometime, somewhere, once upon a time, that Gary and Gil were a part of... Yeah, that's the best biography you're going to get.

So the story goes that Miryo had a fancy for some Seo Taiji backup dancer (or as Allkpop likes to call it, backdancer), and this Joora got wind of it. Naturally, being the caring friend that he was, he waltzed right up to the backup dancer (presumably without Miryo's prior consent or knowledge), told the dude that Miryo was interested, received a reply along the lines of "no, she's too manly", and then went ahead and told the entire world on Secret (because, you know, everybody watches this show).

Miryo's response "I don't remember this" feels more like a "shut the fuck up before I stick my cock down your throat" than anything else. Of course, like all douchey men, he can't take a hint though. "However, that was before Miryo got her teeth fixed".

Ballsy. He reminds me of an older me.

Thursday, October 27, 2011

Kpop Flashmob in NYC



For any Americans here (most of the readers are from America), pretend you're not from America for 25 seconds as you watch this. Forgive my lack of writing, but after you watch the video, you'll see why I spent so little time writing this.

Taeyeon's unbuttoned pants make the boys cum.


Yeah. SM knows how to sell their idols.

How to take perfect pictures.

The Fresh gives his advice on how to look flawless in pictures, even without photoshop! (warning: Lots of photos).

Tuesday, October 25, 2011

Strong Heart bullshit

Seo In Young talking to a ghost.
Hyunjoong seeing a UFO.
Suzy refusing my sexual advances.

All complete bullshit, but fans blissfully, and ignorantly, eat that shit up.

I lol'd.

  Saw this post on my Tumblr dashboard.

Psychologist says about Kpop fangirls 

A Psychologist says: “Don’t underestimate those children who chase after Korean celebrities, their hearts are purer than anyone else, they love courageously, they will want to try their best to tackle difficult obstacles, the language and cultural barriers. They symbolize peace, they don’t discriminate based on race, they befriend people with the same interest from different countries, they’re more passionate and warm than anyone else.
They don’t betray the ones they like easily, they are persistent and don’t give up easily. They are stronger than anyone else on the inside, because when they are loving these Korean stars, they experience the setbacks they’ve never experienced in life. They are all sensitive children, easily touched to tears for a long time because of one incident. 

Through investigation, most of them understand gratitude. Their way of thinking is different from others, they don’t easily get carried away by love, they don’t harbour thoughts of doing bad things, and their criteria when looking for a partner is very high, other than looks, personality is more important, so the rate of marriage isn’t high, but neither is the rate of divorce. 

Their memory is very good, they can easily remember the korean lyrics they don’t understand, and their coordination skills are also very strong. Most of them are cheerful children, not the kind who keep to themselves. Their will of determination is also very strong, they are able to persevere all the way just to buy something related to the celebrity they like.  
In short, the way these children think is vastly different from others, and their thoughts are not easy to understand. Generally, only those who have similar interests are able to enter their world.”
 credits: RETURN OF THE SUPERIOR
 Source: http://i52.tinypic.com/am9jba.png| Translated by sixbyul.tumblr
 Shared on sup3rjunior.wordpress.com by elf101586

LOL @ the source + highlighted bits, just lol.

Stick to writing fanfics people.

The Jessica conspiracy.




Horse on horse action
Jessica always gets top
Or bitches will die

Yes, that was a haiku. Anyways.

Our dear Sica was caught riding a horse yesterday, much to the dismay of Taecsica shippers, horse-ape enthusiasts, and strangely enough, every member of 4minute (sans Hyuna), who supposedly had much to say, but were ignored due to their extreme irrelevance.

After the pictures were uploaded to the internet, netizens immediately began to criticize her actions and deemed them "highly inappropriate". A SM representative quickly spoke up, saying, "There is no use in hiding the truth anymore. Yes, it is true, Jessica is a horse." (note: It may interest readers to know that SM Ent. immediately released a statement denying the representative's claims, and threatened to file a lawsuit that could last years, even with the knowledge that they would lose).

Netizens responded with "Poor Taecyeon", "So Taec.... how does it feel to fuck a horse", and "I still want to fuck her" (written by Jay Park, who later confessed to being drunk at the time).

Picture credits to Anon4586 (who indeed requested to be credited as such).

Monday, October 24, 2011

SNSD Exposed in NYC: Jacking Hyosung's Swagger



The female Flop B? GET READY FOR SOME 'HEP HAP' Y'ALL.

Yup, Cho PeeDee's jumping around the living room in his pink Hello Kitty (Yes, it's Zico's, no prizes for guessing that...as Blockheads say 'Only REAL men like Hello Kitty' TROLOLOL) panties about his upcoming girl group (might debut next year). Apparently they're called 'EvoL', lol. Now you're wondering 'what the fuck does that even stand for?'. 'EvoL' is simply love spelt backwards....Eminem's Space Bound anyone?


Taken from their tumblr fansite credits to http://fuckyeahevol.tumblr.com/

EvoL = LovE but it’s pronounced as “evil”. Don’t ask me why, Cho PD made it that way. I’m expecting them to be hephap as well because they’re supposed to mirror Block B. Besides, BNS is not likely to debut a cute girl group, right?

Some Blackjacks on my Twitter are not too pleased with EvoL's name since 2NE1's name means 'New Evolution Of The 21st Century' and EvoL according to them could possibly be the short for Evolution, which ya know is OBVIOUSLY DELIBERATE since every group either copies SNSD or 2NE1 lolol. Some YG stans on my TL have shared their thoughts regarding EvoL through Twitlonger : 'Ugh, first Cho PD makes a copycat Big Bang called Block B where Zico is a GD wannabe and that other TOP wannabe & NOW A WANNABE 2NE1? CHO PD IS SO LAME AISH!'


It seems like they have their very own version of Sandara Park because ya know one wasn't good enough. On the bright side, she has more talent in her left ear lobe alone than Dara has in her entire body! Yay!

Fun fact : Dara's mini me 'Dasom' also happens to an ex-YG trainee who was apparently going to be a part of YG's rumoured version of SNSD.




OMG YGE STYLISTS LEAVE TABLO ALONE YOU DUMBFUCKS!



WHAT THE ACTUAL FUCK IS HE WEARING?


BITCHES THIS AIN'T G-DRUGGIN OPPAR FFS!


OMG IT'S PROBABLY THE SAME SHIT G-DRUGGIN WORE FOR GD&POT'S HIGH HIGH PROMOS. STOP RE-CYCLING THAT PIECE OF SHIT, GIVE IT TO HYUNA OR HYOMIN UNNIE, THEY NEED TO COVER THEMSELVES!


Question of the Week 17

This week's questions come from ChiChi:
1) If you ever saw your bias anywhere, what would you say or do to them?
2) If you saw some idol you hate anywhere, what would you say or do to them?

Thank you for your suggestion for this week.

1) In my head, I would probably look super calm and nonchalantly ask for a picture and an autograph. And in a magical dreamland, proceed to ask to hang out occasionally until we became BFFs and rode unicorns all day long forever. In reality though, I would probably hyperventilate, inaudibly and incoherently ask for a photo, then inadvertently creep them out until they awkwardly walked away and called security to take me in. Not that that's happened before. Good times.
2) I would kick them in the nuts then run away giggling while I had a friend record my adventure.

If anyone has suggestions for later Question of the Weeks, please send them to zomg.oppa.sareanghae@gmail.com

Sunday, October 23, 2011

Feminist are Stupid but Fans are Worse

I feel like since this is an Anti-Fan blog I should specify why I loathe some fans and not other. The fans I don’t hate are the fickle new fans that get into kpop just as quick as they grow out of it therefore they become irrelevant.


The first type of fans I cannot stand, are the ones who believe their “bias” should have more lines in a song or should have more screen time or credit and the second is the fans who use slogans or catch phrases.


Example time!


Take Shawols for instance. Minho is supposedly the person that gets the least amount of lines in most of the songs (I wouldn’t know I don’t go around counting lines). They complain that Minho only gets the “rapping” (bunny ears cause he can’t rap) parts and one or two “singing” (bunny ears cause he can’t sing) lines. Well Shawols tough luck the boy wasn’t hired as a lead or sub vocalist, he wasn’t hired as the main dancer but he was hired to rap and be the face of the group. So frankly that’s all he should do; it was in the job description when he decided to sign the damn contract.


Goo Hara being another perfectly good example of an Idol who can’t sing but was hired to be the “visuals” (bunny ears because I think she has funny teeth) in the group.



Example time two!


Short list of some of the could-have-been-long-list-of-comment-clogging-moronic-stuff-people-have-come-up-with-to-spam-about-their-idols.


Sones

S.T.A.N.D

Strong

Till

All

Nine

Dominate


They are the definition of Great Entertainers. (hmm?)

They are the definition of Girl Power. (Thought feminist were a dying breed)

They are the definition of Beauty. (One word - Hyoyeon)


Power of Nine


ELF

If the world betrays Super Junior, then ELF’s will betray the world.


Prom15e to 13elieve and 10ve the remaining 10 and prot3ct the missing 3 (Guess they'll have to be changing that one eh)


ELF and Super Junior is “one”


BEAST

SO BEAST <3 (I really cannot believe they are trying to make beast into a verb)


Beast is B2st!


Infinite

Infinite – Every day, every hour, every minute and every second we are inspirt.


So what do you hate about the extremist who call themselves fans ?

Teaser for AS's Diva



I love it when the group makes it easy on me. I just have to post the video because it's so bad on its own. Makes my job so much easier.

I see a lot of Playboyz (seriously, Pledis should have come up with a better fan club name. It always reminds me of the magazine) complaining that Raina stole Jungah's lines. Just be happy that the main vocalist stole the lines. If you're a T-ara fan, you're used to Hwayoung stealing lines from the main vocalist (Soyeon) and the lead vocalist (Hyomin). So just keep in mind that it could be worse.

I do feel bad for some of the older members here. Kahi is 45 and has to pretend to be a 15 year old girl in this MV. They gave Jooyeon a shitty makeup stylist, making her look older. It's bad enough she's already 30. Jungah looks like a grandma.

So I'm wondering how the AS fans here feel. I don't pay attention to AS at all, but from what I'm gathering it seems like a lot of people are disappointed, unless it's just the Bekah and Jungah stans being the vocal minority.

So apparently ELFs are accusing SM Entertainment of being biased towards SNSD.

Oppars never get treated well ;____;

SNSD gets their own VEVO channel with uploaded live perfs! Suju & SHINee oppas get nothing! Even fail(x) gets nothing! ;____;

Lee Soo Man's whisper is the lucifer ;____; 

Even though Kim Young Min's the CEO now.

It doesn't matter though, those 9 sluts are sleeping around and getting special treatment!!!11111 :(

Omo, what will happen to my oppars? :(

Will they end up flipping burgers in McDonalds after their contract gets over? :(

Or will they go to Thailand and pursue their dreams of becoming an exotic dancer?




At the end of the day, nothing changes and no1curr either.

We lahv K-pop drama.

DRAMAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!

DUH-RAMAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!