[MV Review] SECRET - Poison

AHEM. Stealing this from Allkpop for spice.

The beautiful ladies of SECRET have finally returned with “POISON“!

SECRET stirred up great interest with their new classy yet sexy transformation revealed starting last week, and now the wait is over. Although the title may be “POISON” it’s anything but toxic as the music video leaves you longing for more.

Check out the MV review below~!

That was painful, I'm never doing this again.

Like our erstwhile colleagues at Allkpop have said, Secret's latest title track is Poison. The MV is a combination of storyline and dance in box with close-ups. Wow, that was boring as shit to read/write.

The basic plot of Poison is set in the Roaring Twenties, if the Roaring Twenties happened in Korea. The MV opens with Hyosung paying a visit to a private investigator's office. The plot of the Poison MV unfolds as an extended flashback recounted by her to the investigator. Right from the get-go, she sets up her (and by proxy the rest of SECRET) image as the quintessential femme fatale.

The ladies of SECRET run what appears to be either a speakeasy or a brothel, who knows. At any rate, we quickly learn through by no means disguised looks that the girls of SECRET are up to no good. Jieun SUNHWA seduces some random scrub to unveil a tattoo of some numbers, ostensibly a combination to some kind of safe. Catching Zinger's attention, Zinger passes it on to Sunhwa JIEUN. It really makes no sense why they had to do this, but poor Sunhwa has to get screen time somehow.

Here's where shit gets messy. While waiting for the other members to rendezvous at some secret location, Sunhwa and Zinger are threatened by the random scrub seduced earlier. He's brought a buttbuddy this time, and the two of them have Jieun held captive at gunpoint. The plot summary is getting long (mostly because the plot exposition was pretty boring, so I didn't want to gif it) so here's the climax of the story in gif form:

Long story short, they get the jewels and get away with it.

Returning to the present, Hyosung wraps up her story and prepares to take her leave. Making one last seduction, she takes advantage of his lapse in vigilance to slip him an alka-seltzer roofie cyanide(?) pill in his scotch. Probably to wrap up the loose ends, especially since we find out that the PI has been following their every move. At any rate, the poor schmuck takes the bait and drinks his cup of poison.

SECRET's MV plot is surprisingly decent, although retarded in places. They play very competent femme fatales in the vein of Catwoman and other legendary jewel thieves, but really it has nothing to do with the song. At least nothing to do with the "official interpretation."

Producers Kang Ji Won and Kim Ki Bum revealed previously, “The hip hop genre song which utilizes repeating saxophone segments, describes the feeling of being unable to break away even while knowing that as one falls in love, it only ends up becoming poison to the individual.”

Right.

At any rate, we all know you came to SECRET for the faps, not the plot. At worst, you could write the entire thing off as visual porn with plot. Fear not, SECRET definitely delivers in this department. Everyone looks good (except Zinger, but she's passable if you're into bestiality I guess) and the choreography is fapadelic, man.

Sex vixen Sunhwa making her debut.

Fap dance Hyosung~!!

Crotch angles are jjangbak.

Rather controversial choreography, but who cares. You fapped anyway. It is a shame that Hyosung dominates the majority of the closeups and such, but she's smoking hot so it's fine. Sunhwa and Jieun deserve more lovin though!! Zinger got way too many parts for my liking, but more on that later. Her latest bout of touchups made look like the 45+ year old version of Hyuna. Or at least her mom.

The song itself is pretty great though. The sax riffs are jjangbak, and combined with some big band brassy notes, give the whole song an old school RnB swing fusion feel. It's starting to become a trend with SECRET, but the way they manage to put a modern twist on the "retro" isn't that bad at all. The build up to Zinger's raps and her raps themselves still suck though. On that note, Zinger's gotten a few more extra lines than the token rap bits, but that's not a good thing. They're still pretty awkward and her constipated "WHUT" at the end of her main rap made me choke on my water.

Thank tha Lawd for Hyosung though. I do wonder why they give her all the uncomfortable-looking heels
all the time, they must be killer on her toes...

TL;DR:
Faptastic MV for a very nice song about Hyosung and her girls.

+:

• HYOSUNG
• lots of Hyosung closeups & solo time
• fapulous choreography
• interesting storyline that actually makes sense
• saxy sax

-:

• not enough Sunhwa or Jieun
• ZINGER
• rap anything Zinger says

I give this song a 3.75 out of 5.