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Wednesday, June 18, 2014

DEFCON 5 -- TAEYEON X BAEKHYUN -- REPORT TO BATTLESTATIONS

SHIT HITTING FAN

ALL CONTRIBUTORS FREELY UPDATE THIS ARTICLE WITH NEWS AND MELTDOWNS


Here's my thoughts:

We all remember this popular AKF article, about Taeyeon's cleavage, yes?

Baekhyun's special power is "light".  He just wants to illuminate the darkness under those breasts and find out the truth.

There could be anything down there.  Godspeed, Baekhyun.

- KPOPALYPSE

Bonus fan meltdown courtesy of Patrik Andersson

There are not enough popcorn gifs in the world because we'll need them over the next several days as both fandoms go apeshit. - Anti Kpop-Fangirl

Thanks to klogg/fiddle.se for the heads up.
Click photo to enlarge. Thanks to klogg/fiddle.se for this picture.
It's 6 AM so I have to go to bed now, but this shit is to entertaining that I don't want to miss any more than I already have. - Anti Kpop-Fangirl

아저씨: Shit is getting ugly, especially since the SM confirmation I am too lazy to source. She's also saying shit on IG now like a boss instead of being silent. Anyway, here is an official message for fangirls/fanboys.


YOU THOUGHT I WAS KIDDING ABOUT DEFCON 5

Zaku:

RIP TAENY L0L0L0L


Kpopalypse:

Look what someone just linked me.  Holy living fuck there are some unhinged psychos out there.  Screencapped it before he/she wises up and deletes it:


Complete unhinged madness!  Slayer fans got nothing on EXO/SNSD shippers!

EDIT: just noticed 아저씨 already linked this.  Well hey - at least you have a screencap now!

65 comments:

  1. Was about to post it. hah

    Taeyeon is my waifu and will always be, I am happy she's dating.

    Hopefully this means mass-suicide of exo bitches !

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. She's got a shit taste in men tho.

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    2. Thank goodness she's not as superficial as you are then, huh ?

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    3. Maybe if she was she wouldn't have had to settle for somebody from EXO.

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    4. Pretty sure you don't know those kids personally.

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    5. I don't have to know somebody to know that person isn't attractive.

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    6. She's finds him attractive and that's all that matters.

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    7. I don't really know why anybody would find prepubescent looking guys attractive, especially when she likely could've hooked up with a Hugh Jackman lookalike.

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    8. I'm going to pull a Kpopalypse and say everyone has different taste (because it's the truth). Some people don't find Taeyeon attractive and that's okay. Others thinks she's beautiful and that's okay too. It's like music, not everyones going to like the same things.

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    9. I know she has different tastes than me, but why does she have to have SHIT taste?

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    10. Because she likes shitty things. (First thing that came to mind.)

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    11. Fortunately, your taste doesn't matter, Robbie.

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    12. oh come on guys it's a cute lesbian couple alright

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    13. @No: I agree.
      @RealJW: When SM doesn't make him up to look like a chick (basically with a bare face) he looks a lot less girly imo.

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    14. am i the only one here who sees why she would go for baek?

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    15. No I see why too. Some people can't accept that and it's annoying. I'm really disappointed in these fandoms. I feel like I'm the 1% of people who actually support them :/

      Delete
  2. two overrated people, from overrated groups, in a overrated company, who both say racist things. match made in heaven. congrats.

    ReplyDelete
  3. NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO !!!

    Taeyeon ahhh T_T

    ReplyDelete
  4. http://m.media.daum.net/m/entertain/newsview/20140619110816815

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Time to unleash the blood thirsty fangirls/ boys.

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    2. She's going to pegged with something the next time she performs

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    3. Not a chance. K-Pop fans are fucking wimps. They couldn't even get a simple black ocean together for T-ARA last year. The worst thing they can do is post comments about what lazy wastes-of-spaces idols are whilst sitting on the computer doing absolutely nothing aside from typing hate comments and being lazy wastes-of-spaces.

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    4. What about that one guy who tried to drag Taeyeon off stage?

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    5. They simply dont have producers who are like minded in no dating rules

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  5. Set condition ONE. This is not a Drill!

    http://youtu.be/f8e3JVFRIEk

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  6. Taeyeon is my #1 Female Bias in all K-pop and my #1 Unnar. I love Baekhyun too. Congratulations to them both!!! I'm really happy for her :D!

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  7. Says written by kpopalypse but posted using ajusshi account??

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. He posted the heading saying "ALL CONTRIBUTORS FREELY UPDATE THIS ARTICLE WITH NEWS AND MELTDOWNS", so I updated the article as per 아저씨's instruction. It appears under 아저씨 because he started the article off. That's why I labelled my contribution with my name. Hopefully other AKF authors also weigh in under my addition, it'll make this post less confusing.

      Delete
  8. Eh, it's probably a beard. Or maybe Taeyeon is bi?

    Don't worry boys, there are definitely no gay idols! Korea's morality is safe for another day.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Does Korea even have beards? Most idols are not even allowed to (publicly)date at all, let alone date someone just to throw the public off the scent of their gay.

      Delete
  9. http://i2.media.daumcdn.net/svc/image/U03/news/201406/19/dispatch/20140619122909850.jpg I just love this picture so much. It really shows what 21st century journalism has come to.

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  10. I'm not sure about the reliability of this news site but it seems that it is confirmed that Taeyeon and Baekhyun is dating: http://www.sbs.com.au/popasia/blog/2014/06/19/exos-baekhyun-girls-generation-s-taeyeon-rumoured-be-dating

    RELEASE THE KRAKEN!

    ReplyDelete
  11. Meanwhile, Durex are total bros:
    http://onehallyu.com/index.php?/topic/78265-condom-brand-durex-congratulates-baekyeon-couple/

    ReplyDelete
  12. FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU ive had so many drinks today. MY BODY WAS NOT READY.

    they should've waited to let us recover from khunfany before destroying the last bastion of hope T_T.

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  13. yaaaaaaasssss get it baek bb
    love this pairing even more because it will involve two of the most popular members in two of the most insane fandoms

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  14. They are incredibly rude. It's not like any of them have ever met Baekhyun or are entitled to him. The exotics' response would be entertaining if I wasn't so disgusted at their cruelty.

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  15. Wow. This is glorious.

    Although wtf, seriously, Baekhyun of all people?! Taeyeon could have any guy she wanted and she picked the fugliest, most obnoxious faggot from EXO? GURL, you need to get some help for that depression, look what it's doing to you!

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  16. This may be bigger the Chinese EXO member's lawsuit.

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  17. She has great taste in cars, but not men.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Baekhyun is the best fucking SONE ever. Taeyeon was his ideal type, now the nigga dating her.

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    2. I'm just saying the guy has a bad background, and given all the things EXO is going through right now, what perfect timing am I right?

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  18. My gaydar was wrong on Taeyeon....dammit!! If Yuri gets a boyfriend next my gaydar is officialy garbage!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. None of them will ever admit to officially be gay.
      So you can still stay delulu.

      Delete
    2. If anyone's gaydar is shit it's Taeyeon. Junsu, Leeteuk, now Baekhyun.

      Delete
  19. SM media play in action. Kris is said to be filming a movie and getting gigs in China, so it ain't a stretch for SM to confirm "shocking news" to prevent him from getting any more publicity. Congrats to the new couple, but I wouldn't be surprised if they "drift apart due to busy promotion schedules, but decide to remain close friends" by the end of the year. As always, it's fun to watch BaekYeol and TaeNy shippers lose their shit.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Why would SNSD give a fuck about what Kris does in China now that they've parted ways? And why would SM sabotage two of the biggest stars they do have, just in order to frivolously spite him?

      (it's not as though this is going to affect Kris's publicity in any case, since the latter is in -- China.)

      Delete
    2. It just seems odd that SM would release all this information so quickly regarding a relationship between two of their own idols. SM confirmed it themselves, well aware of both the publicity and hate both idols would receive. Not sure if or why they wanted Kris out of Korean news, but it happened.

      Delete
  20. There was this one tumblr post that I was able to read regarding Kris’ lawsuit, it was said there that Sm ent was trying to use Kris as a cover up of the tax evasion case that the company/company’s current ceo was facing since sm ent was not doing anything towards the issue unlike the other ones that occur the last time — JYJ and Hangeng’s issue.

    Idk if its true but it made sense to me that time but now we’re facing another issue which is the Baekyeon dating scandal.

    If you were skimming thru the tag you’ll see other posts regarding how dispatch and sm perfected the scandal, it was soooooo perfectlt arranged, look at the angle of the pictures, it seemed to me that the camera was placed somewhere in a better location where everything was seen clearly. Next, gosh who in a right mind would date in a open car when you know that both of you are artist and you are ought to hide your identity - unlike the other snsd couples that was seen by dispatch they were covered with scarves, sunglasses and cap but this two were barely hiding their identity as if they are showing it off?

    Another, if this issue was meant to cover both of kris’ lawsuit and sment’s tax evasion issue, then the picture would fit, during the first two issues, sm ent was losing a lot of money and their stocks was going down, but when the Baekyeon issue was dropped the money and their stocks just went up.

    If they were trying to cover up kris’ issue then why of all people they chose Baek?

    EXO is undeniably the “talk of the town” in Korea, anything they do, they will gain attention. Kris’ issue is one of the proof — and for it to die down they needed someone within the same group to create a scandal that could create noise. EXO-M is out of the box since they are always outside Korea, within K, there are only 2 people who sm could use, Baek and Chanyeol but yeol is currently doing a variety show and putting him on a scandal is not a good move for SM — that’s why they chose baek as a good candidate, and since Baek will have his musical debut soon, it will also serve as a good publicity for him (the means might not be good but the ends are). Also, Baek openly said that Taeng was his ideal type so it is easy for SM to pull some strings to put up this kind of scandal.

    And lastly, this scandal can also be a good way of eliminating exo’s sasaeng fans.

    The ends are good but the means were not, if this is true then I pity both baekhyun and Taeyeon for being sm’s experiments.

    This is the reason why sm needs a better CEO

    Ugh.

    NOTE: everything was just based on observation please take this with a grain of salt.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. They might have deliberately made the paparazzi thing right now, but I don't think Taeyeon is the person that would just pretend to be in a relationship for their management.

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    2. http://i.imgur.com/KLyJGLZ.gif

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    3. I never thought of it that way...

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  21. Fuck Tiffany. It looks like Taeyeon found a bigger pussy to trib with.

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  22. This comment has been removed by the author.

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  23. Is this what you'd call mental illness?

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    Replies
    1. Just to clarify, because this is the internet, I was referring to the fan reactions. What is wrong with these people?

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    2. It could go both ways. Why Taeyeon would date someone from Exo, when she knows full god damn well that those fans are batshit crazy. She's just asking for hate.

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    3. "She's just asking for hate." - Absolutely not.

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  24. I could care less about the two dating. Like go ahead date all you want. The shit that happens because of their fans are just amusing.

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