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Tuesday, August 9, 2016

Introducing: Anti Kpop-Fangirl's Girl Group Wars!


Yesterday's debut of BLACKPINK has brought new life to the constant fan wars between girl groups, as Twice fans flood YouTube comment sections worldwide. In honour of the completion of the third generation's holy triumvirate of big-label girl groups, and the fact that AKF is going to be short on posts in the coming months, I've decided to launch a March-Madness-style girl group bracket. Hopefully, through a combination of votes and my own impeccable judgment and taste, we will be able to determine who is the true ruler of third generation girl groups, worthy of joining the Hallyu Pantheon.

Every Wednesday, starting next week, I will open voting for the week's round. I'll include a short profile of all the groups in contention, and voting will be open for a week. The winner of each match-up will be determined based on a proprietary algorithm.

Much like Yoona, I am both smart and beautiful. 
Just kidding. It will be determined by adding together the percentage of votes it received plus the score I gave the group out of 100. So, if Group A wins 70% of the vote and I give it a 50/100, it will receive 120 points. If Group B wins 30% of the vote and I give it a 70/100, it will receive 100 points, and so on and so forth.

The seeds are determined through a highly scientific combination of YouTube video views, number of times people on this blog have raved about them, fancafe sizes and black magic, and are as follows:
  1. Twice
  2. Mamamoo
  3. G-Friend
  4. Red Velvet
  5. BLACKPINK
  6. Lovelyz
  7. Oh My Girl
  8. April
  9. Sonamoo
  10. I.O.I.
  11. CLC
  12. Gugudan
  13. Cosmic Girls/WSJN
  14. Brave Girls
  15. DIA
  16. Pledis Girlz
                                  "Why are we seeded so low, we're cute as shit!" 
                                  I left out The Ark, Laboum and Playback because they're effectively defunct (Laboum funded their last video through Makestar ... don't even play) and also I could only have 16 groups to make this bracket work, so suck it up. Also suck it up if I forgot some nugu group.You can see the bracket below, or at http://challonge.com/akfgirlgroupwars. It will be updated as the tournament progresses.
                                   

                                  This means that next Wednesday, August 17th, voting for the first four Round 1 matchups will commence. If you have a stake in Twice vs. Pledis Girlz or April vs. Sonamoo, tune in to vote!

                                  Mina ain't worried
                                  Red Velvet vs. Cosmic Girls/WSJN and BLACKPINK vs. Gugudan will start August 24th, and the tournament should wrap up on October 5th, unless I fucked up my calendar-reading or have to take a week off. Best of luck to all the contenders!

                                  32 comments:

                                  1. Let me tell you the one and only truth:

                                    Twice is a very solid mix of pretty girls, but I'm seeing the dangerous potential to drift into I Got A Boy shittery, which would be a gigantic waste.

                                    Sonamoo has some hot girls. Or maybe it was mamamoo.

                                    Red Velvet has the prettiest girl from all of these groups, Irene, but also the most punchable one (Yeri) and two quite ugly ones (the unjoyous and sougly ones).

                                    Cosmic Girls are a fun combination, but I don't personally care much for them.

                                    Blackpink has potential, but that's it for now.

                                    Girlfriend is a boring shitshow with at least two botched faces. And yes, I refuse to call them by their retarded official naming. I also don't write "u" and "2" in my MP3s.

                                    The 101 girls have the disadvantage of being from a show who's media presence annoyed me. I'm looking forward to Somi becoming a hot woman, though.

                                    Lovelies, another retardedly stylized name. Kind of a boring shitshow like girlfriend, except for actually having some decent looking members.

                                    CLC does have a cute ratqueen with Yujin, but... fucking SORN AHAHAHAHAHHAHAHA


                                    April, pledis girls, oh my girl etc. are all irrelevant and I hope they die in nuguhell.



                                    And what the fuck is a gugudan. Sounds like a Gundam.

                                    ReplyDelete
                                    Replies
                                    1. Gugudan is the group with Kim Sejeong, aka the best girl from IOI.

                                      http://antikpopfangirl.blogspot.com/2016/07/gugudan-wonderland.html

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                                    2. Black Punks got lucky General Sejeong wasn't with the IOI group.

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                                    3. I love you. Lmao. I only know 4 from these groups and Ive been a fan of Kpop since 2003 and semi-halted after graduating college on 2010. But yeah April, Lovelyz, OMG, Gugudan can all combine and make a Korean AKB48?

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                                    4. I love you. Lmao. I only know 4 from these groups and Ive been a fan of Kpop since 2003 and semi-halted after graduating college on 2010. But yeah April, Lovelyz, OMG, Gugudan can all combine and make a Korean AKB48?

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                                    5. PLEASE tell me how you can tell the RV girls apart. This is my greatest life struggle.

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                                    6. It's easy. It's called not being a racist asshole and thinking all of us chinks look alike.

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                                    7. I'm not a racist asshole (I think...) and I still can't tell those 5 bitches apart.

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                                    8. Loooooooooooooooool. I don't have this problem with other girl groups (or any of my Asian relatives or friends or acquaintances or enemies), so I don't think it's that I'm racist. I think they just all dyed their hair the same colour and it confused me deeply.

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                                    9. You only need to know Irene and maybe, sometimes Wendy.

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                                    10. I know Wendy! But only because I actually know/knew her

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                                    11. I sometimes can tell who's who but sometimes I'm confused. I bet this has something to do with some secret evil project SM is doing. Do your work Kpopalypse.

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                                    12. (Kpopalypse voice) kalliope, I find your lack of knowledge disturbing(/Kpopalypse voice)

                                      (no audio)points at http://antikpopfangirl.blogspot.com.es/2015/04/the-red-velvet-identification-test.html with pointy thingy(/no audio)

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                                  2. This sounds like a great idea, I'll be rooting for Twice, GFriend, CLC, and DIA the most. RV probably doesn't need much support.

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                                    Replies
                                    1. Blackdick needs to suck RedBellys cock first to be recognized

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                                  3. Twice, Red Velvet, B-Pink and Lovelyz are the only ones worth worrying about long term. CLC should be but Cube is a shitshow right now. Everyone else is from one of those shitty little companies you never hear of except when there's some sort of prostitution scandal

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                                  4. Should I tell other websites about this? I mean, a bigger and more diversified survey sample is always better, but there's a danger of skewed population, since I might post this on sites where certain groups are more popular than the others, so it becomes a biased population sample.

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                                    Replies
                                    1. Go nuts! I'm mostly interested in the opinions of the AKF community, I guess, but it'd be nice to have more voices too!

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                                  5. Is this a talent, visual babeage or C all around because some are handicapped by their nuguness e.g. RV vs Cosmic Girls. CG will lose but Bona, Mei Qi, Chen Xiao and Xuan Yi are knockouts visually. Same with Gugudan/BP - Gugu has some serious top level singing talent in Sejeong, Haebin and Nayoung, and a solid album release but people like the whole 2ne1 redux with BP's ghetto girl thing.

                                    As a slight aside, Sejeong will be the biggest star out of anyone from all these groups - girl is damn near Solji in vocal talent - https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OOC72-AgV7M (one with the hat), has cute girl next door looks, a fantastic happy and humble personality and is becoming a variety MC queen. She's the real deal....

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                                    Replies
                                    1. This is going to be all-around. But I'm trying to be as fair as possible in my ratings and give some bonus points to lesser-known groups that happen to be talented.

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                                    2. Is there anybody else who thinks that WJSN's Eunseo drop dead gorgeous?

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                                  6. I'm outraged that there is no Orange Caramel.

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                                  7. I once made a visual battle poll of mark, vernon, sehun, and jungkook. Jungkook's votes suddenly doubled while the others remained the same. Based on this experience, i predict shitnamoo to win

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                                    Replies
                                    1. I don't know if you're referring to Mamamoo or Sonamoo, lol

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                                    2. Sonamoo. Mamamoo is fine, they can sing, which is rare despite kpop being a music industry

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                                  8. that 5/12 match up...sets up just like real march madness where a 12 always seems to upset a 5.

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                                    Replies
                                    1. Yeah I'm ready for it tbh. Won't see me trying to stop the will of the people.

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                                  9. 1. GFriend
                                    2. Twice
                                    3. WJSN
                                    4. DIA
                                    5. Gugudan
                                    6. IOI
                                    7. Lovelyz
                                    8. Sonamoo
                                    9. Pledis Girlz
                                    10. Oh My Girl
                                    11. Brave Girls
                                    12. Berry Good
                                    13. CLC
                                    14. Mamamoo
                                    15. Red Velvet
                                    16. BlackPink

                                    ReplyDelete
                                  10. 1. GFriend
                                    2. Twice
                                    3. WJSN
                                    4. DIA
                                    5. Gugudan
                                    6. IOI
                                    7. Pledis Girlz
                                    8. Brave Girls
                                    9. Oh My Girl
                                    10. Berry Good
                                    11. Lovelyz
                                    12. Sonamoo
                                    13. Laboum
                                    14. April
                                    15. Fiestar
                                    16. CLC
                                    17. Mamamoo
                                    18. The Ark
                                    19. Red Velvet
                                    20. BlackPink

                                    ReplyDelete
                                    Replies
                                    1. 1. GFriend
                                      2. Berry Good
                                      3. Twice
                                      4. DIA
                                      5. Gugudan
                                      6. IOI
                                      7. Pledis Girlz
                                      8. Brave Girls
                                      9. Oh My Girl
                                      10. Cosmic Girls
                                      11. Lovelyz
                                      12. Sonamoo
                                      13. Laboum
                                      14. Rainbow
                                      15. Secret
                                      16. Apink
                                      17. T-ara
                                      18. After School
                                      19. Hello Venus
                                      20. Nine Muses
                                      21. Dal Shabet
                                      22. Stellar
                                      23. Fiestar
                                      24. April
                                      25. Myb
                                      26. CLC
                                      27. Mamamoo
                                      28. The Ark
                                      29. Red Velvet
                                      30. Black Pink

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                                  11. Fuck you boygroup stans, BlackPink is much better than Greefriend Red Belly Tways SNSDorks Exoshits BigTinySmall gook bangtan cocks aka BTSfags. BlackPink is the next 2NE1 but 1000x better mark my words.

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