F(x) album review

I’m sulli_fag. I’m locked in my basement writing this to you right now (June 15, 2012). Alert! I am being held hostage by SM marketers, and they want me to promote and review F(x)’s new album. If I choose not to review this album, three Samoan SM staff members will pull their triggers and my head will be eradicated. 

 Pictured here:

scared

This is NOT a joke! They have guns pointed to my head and my arms are strapped down. If I even say ONE negative thing about f(x) or a member they will cut my arms off—goodbye fapping to Bora, IU, Minzy’s ass, Yura, Hwayoung and her twin, horsey hyomin, horsey sica, tia fancams, Lime, Lime’s buttcrack, U Go Gurl era Lee Hyori, Eunjung, fat whore’s like Suzy and Sooyoung, Krystal’s face, krystal’s legs, krystal’s hair and ass, GP Basic…and Sulli…I named myself after her in hopes that I one day will feel what it’s like to have my nose deep down inside her milky white buttcrack. I’ve always wanted to smell it---God I bet it smells like a luscious slice of cabbage that’s been traveling through a Candy Factor. OH SULLI! I’m so sorry it has come to this! Forgive me.

Album Review:  I really enjoyed this album everything is great every song is great…all the members sang wonderfully. Please buy the album and DO NOT repeat DO NOT download that shit from any websites because that’s illegal! Amber is the best rapper I have ever heard….and she is not a DYKE, er lesbian. E….

Ok, they left to take a shit and make some fro yo…Here’s my real review of each song.

Eel-lectric shock- Well, honestly there isn’t anything bad to say about this song. Every sound and every vocal is where it needs to be. Love the electronic sound, lots of cool base sound, clapping, drum beats, and my fave was that laser beam type sound that comes in at the chorus. I did notice when Amber’s parts came up her voice was not as strong and she struggled a bit to even hit the notes. I’m also happy that there is very little OBVIOUS autotune being used in this song and that there is a lot of parts within the song that harmonize—I think it’s pretty impressive (let’s see if they can do that live). Overall this is a song I can and HAVE blasted in my car driving down the boulevard….even when I roll up near some cholos—they don’t seem to mind or flash me gang signs….nor throw chiles rellenos or guacamole at me.

Grade: A

RHAHAAH...FAIL

Jet­- This song has pretty much the same idea as Electric Shock. DANCE! And although I think it’s a pretty fun song and I can dance to it. I think there is some parts (Mostly all the spoken word shit) that bothers me. I hate when it sounds like someone is talking sometimes…not sure why. But overall, it’s not a bad song…has song good beats. One part I like is when Sulli sings and you can hear her HORNY sound from Pinocchio—that shit turns me on. She needs to make a whole song filled with horny noises….kind of like this….Grade: B

NSFW

 BEFORE I MOVE ON TO THE NEXT SONG---ENJOY AMBER'S ASS! NOM NOM NOM

 That's a pretty nice ass. Bet her butthole looks white and not all brown and shit...she probably bleaches it.

So where was I?!?!?

Oh. 

Zig Zag-This is my second favorite song on the album (1st is electric shock). I just really like the electro beats and victorias voice/sulli sounds really good. Actually all of them sound damn good. The chorus hooks me in and I love Manber's vocal inserts....sounds far less annoying in this song than in Jet. This is the kind of song, you can lay your girlfriend down to and make babies too. Oh and I thought they should have done this song + eel-lectric cock for their live comeback. U failed me f(x). Grade: A

please fuck me like this sulli...gawd damn

 Beautiful Stranger--

PEDO STRANGER: GIMME DAT ASS KRYSTAL!!!

Like seriously, what do you want me to say about this shitty fucking song. OH shit. The samoans are back!  ummmm 
 They brought a friend--pictured here:

YOU'RE FUCKING DEAD SULLI_FAG

She looks fucking PISSED. I better get serious here! ....Beautiful Stranger is the kind of song (at first listen) I didn't like it. But the more and more I listen to it, the more I like it. For some reason it really sounds like Lee Hyori's music, which is  not a bad thing. I really enjoyed how the three girls worked together in this song and it really shows who are the strong members of the group. A great song and I put it up their with Electric Shock some say it's the best song on the album. What do you think? Maybe the more I hear it...it's possible that this could become may fav song on the album too. Grade: A

BITCH LOOK

 LOVE HATE-Right now the Somoans are putting their guns to my left thigh. Yeah, they think it's where my dick is but the fact is my dick is about 1.5 inches long. They have no chance of actually shooting my cawk off like they think. I'm gonna take a risk right now. Hopefully those dumb asses can't read. If I get shot, it'll be on my thigh...I'll just fake like it's my dick. "RAhHH MY DICKK>>>RAHHHHH>>>>>NEVER MAKE BaBIeS RAHHHH" 

Just smile and say you like the song

So yeah, this song suck shit. Like this song really suck (I KEEP SMILING AND WRITING SO THEY THINK I AM WRITING A POSITIVE REVIEW).  OK, it's not really that awful but it's far from a great song. See I wrote about it and now I completely forgot how it sounds. FORGETABLE! Still better than PAPARAZZI....heheh you mad SONEHOMOS Grade: C

Let's Try:  

 This song is better than Love Hate (worst song on the album). Actually listening to it right now, Let's Try is a pretty darn good. I like all the weird vocal shit they are doing with it. It's fun and very Jamaican sounding. Guess this song will be a good starting point for when Krystal has her first black man. She can show him this song, and he can take out his big purple wife beater and ram it in her hard. EEHHHH EHHH KIMOCHIIIIIIIII KIMOCHIII MOTTO MOTTO!!! Grade:B

THIS MAN WILL LIKELY FUCK KRYSTAL AFTER HEARING THIS SONG. PREPARE TO HAVE UNCLE RAPE YOUR WHITE HOLE.

 Oh shit! The Samoans have caught on to what I'm doing. OH FUCK! CALL THE COPS!

U DEAD SULLI_FAG...EAT MY DICK!

MY HEADDDDDDDDDDDDD RAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

   Sulli_fag

RIP December 3, 1947-June 15, 2012 Beloved Son and Uncle 

UPDATE
LUNA FAIL
2:40-2:52 ENJOY