KPOPALYPSE's 30 worst k-pop songs of 2015

Welcome to the post all you cynical fucks have been waiting for - Kpopalypse's 30 worst k-pop songs of 2015!

Read on to find out which k-pop feature tracks Kpopalypse hated the most in 2015!

KPOPALYPSE's 30 favourite k-pop songs of 2015

The Kpopalypse 2015 favourites list is here!  Read on to discover what Kpopalypse liked the most in 2015!

Best of the Worst: Dec. 31, 2015

Welcome, friends, to the last Best of the Worst of 2015. So what's been going on in kpop in the final week of the year? Fans getting outraged about stupid shit, of course.

Yes, TVXQ fans have been cry-crying about iKON's fandom light sticks, which are the same orangey-red color as their beloved group's. It seems that by being a similar color, the iKON sticks are fucking with the integrity of kpop and "disrupting the peace" between fandoms.

I think it's time to call in Officer Yura to maintain the peace. 

The Top 10, Top Lists of 2015

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Why Bandwagons Are Bad.

Just when you thought it would end, the motherfuckin' saga continues.

Apparently IU never gave clarification about her "Zeze" lyrics.

"Not this shit again."

You know, at first I thought this whole misunderstanding couldn't get even dumber but as usual, people that live their lives through the internet never cease to amaze me.

Stupid Things Fangirls Utter 88

This queerbait stated that Seolhyun and Chanmi dressed up as Sexy Santas is trash.

RIP Fappable Hani

Hot Pink is a terrible era for any Hani appreciaters out there. This is what she looks like now.

The 2015 Honours List

Throughout this year, we have all aged; grown wiser and more experienced. However, time has also ravaged our once youthful looks, and we are left with a feeling that maybe we could have put our time to better use. I, for one, used my time absolutely perfectly: listening to lots of shit music, some mediocre music, and a decent amount of good music too now that I think about it. I won't bore you with my wonderful opinions on music that isn't performed in Korean and will instead focus all of my buzzwords and poor reviewing skills onto describing my 15 favourite singles of the year created by folks who hail from the same general area as JYP. How I have chosen to construct this is through using the best song from each of the months of the year, whilst adding in three extra tracks at my own discretion to bring it up to a more pleasant number. I know that you readers have not been privy to four of my honours lists, so I will flag up how every song on the list fits into the magnificent puzzle of my opinions. Once more into the breach my friends, before we are done with the crushing mediocrity of 2015 for good.

Stupid Things Fangirls Utter 87

This comment comes from this AKP article about the Biebs' thoughts on CL's "Hello Bitches".

Bruce Jenner wins Most Beautiful Face for TC Candler's 2015 List

I have no idea who or what TC Candler is, but people are making a big deal out of this list. This list just goes to show no matter how hard women try, men will still end up on top.

UKMAS is Back!

2015 is finally coming to an end which means it's finally time for The Ultimate Kpop Music Awards Show to make it's return!

I'm sure you all are absolutely ecstatic. 

Yay.

Sunday Shitpost #4

This week's edition is really short because I'll be gone most of the day.

Saturday Shitfest #29

I hope everyone had a good Christmas. I have plans to meet up with two awesome people, so I hope you all have a fun day after Christmas as well.

Kpopalypse's review of 2015's cunt-gargling Christmas k-pop trash

Christmas is here, and your Christmas present from Kpopalypse has arrived!  It's time to round up all of the shitty k-pop Christmas songs that were released this year!

Fancam Appreciation #14 - A Pink's Hayoung

This week's submission comes from jewel. No, jewel is not an alias of HYSF, though I'm sure the two would fanboy/fangirl over Hayoung together.

Are there fancams that you want to nominate? Email them to antikpopfangirl@yahoo.com or tweet them to @antikpopfangirl.

Merry Christmas

Merry Christmas, everyone!

AKF's Top 30 Title Tracks of 2015

I'm sure this song is going to be everyone's #1 song of the year.

Anyway, knowing that I was going to be busy this year, I saved an Excel spreadsheet and rated the title songs I listened to throughout the year so that I wouldn't have to wait until the last week of the year asking myself "What the fuck even came out this year?" Halfway throughout the year I only started rating the songs I liked because there was no way I was going to write a list about shitty songs as well. My list ended up with 31 songs that had a rating of 7 or higher, so I removed the song I liked the least and ended up with 30 for this list. Lastly, this list only includes songs up until December 19th. I doubt any Christmas carols released by K-pop groups will make my list, so I am good to go.

suho_ftw's 15 Favorite K-Pop B-Sides of 2015

This is FEMM by the way. Yes I know they're Japanese. Yes they're singing in English. Yes this is a blog post about K-Pop. Are you confused enough yet?

2015 got off to a dry start when it came to albums but that doesn't mean that there weren't some gems to be found. These are the songs I personally found to be stand-out tracks that could have been promoted on their own. 

Disclaimers:
- I kept it one song per artists because I knew if I added more than one song by one artists then the list would have contained songs from like two albums, which would have been accurate but boring. Plus, some other groups had songs I wanted to mention.

- I cheat twice on this list by adding two rap songs. Only twice.

- Quite a few b-sides I liked didn't make it on the list and it does pain me. 

- I didn't have enough time to listen to every album by every artists, but I do listen to a lot of albums.

- More nugus are on my favorite promotional songs lists, as many nugus don't release albums.

- We all know why this is mostly girl groups.

- It's all my opinion.

Stupid Things Fangirls Utter 86

What I learned today is that beauty rankings should not depend on actual beauty, but how good they are at variety! This user got mad over these results.

Stupid Things Fangirls Utter 85

Han Ji Min is one incredibly rude bitch!

Sunday Shitpost #3

Welcome to Sunday Shitpost, the series you read during the extremely long commercial breaks in football games or when you're having a painful bout of diarrhea and need something to laugh at while your asshole is screaming in pain.

Weekly Showdown: 2015 Christmas Special

[Results of last showdown here]

Christmas is right around the corner and we all know that means it's time for shitty Kpop Christmas releases. Yay. To be honest the only two X-mas releases I listened to so far are EXO's and Girls Generation's and neither are all that good really. Since I don't really have any other ideas for a showdown, I'm just gonna put those two up against each other for Best (or in this case, more tolerable) Christmas Release.

In other words, would you rather be happy or depressed this Winter?

Saturday Shitfest #28

I can see netizens jacking it/rubbing it to Choa now after this song. "Unnie/noona is so talented, she slaaaaayyyysss, yaaaaasssss!" The song is much better than I expected, and if I have some time over the holiday weeks (I still have to work -- it's so hard to get used to working in the last half of December when you have been used to having that time off since you were in kindergarten), I'll write a review for the song. Then again, I still need to start my best of 2015 list since I don't have the luxury of waiting until the final day of the year, because then my list would be several weeks late.

Fancam Appreciation #13 - Nine Muses' Sojin

This week's submission comes from Sam, and it's Nine Muses' Sojin. I finally learned one of the new members' name, so that's my accomplishment for the day.

Are there fancams that you want to nominate? Email them to antikpopfangirl@yahoo.com or tweet them to @antikpopfangirl.

Kpopalypse prediction results for 2015 and new super-infallible and totally accurate predictions for 2016

Last year I made a post predicting events in k-pop over the course of 2015.  It's time for Kpopalypse to revisit this post to see how right/wrong I was, and also to predict what's going to happen in k-pop in 2016!

BoA - Lookbook

I was so busy that I forgot about BoA's Lookbook. I knew that it was supposed to come out around this time (and as of the time this post comes out, the single was released yesterday in Japan), but with singles/albums being announced two months in advance in Japan all of the time, it is easy for me to forget about songs. Then I figured it would be a ballad song because of the time of the year, so I figured I would listen to it eventually, but wouldn't rush to listen to the song.

Then yesterday (as of the writing of this post, [I know, what a fucked-up timeline for a scheduled post]), I listened to it for the first time. This was the BoA that made me become a fan.

Koreans Are Also Retarded #1

In the past couple of years, I'm sure you guys have seen a proliferation of people just quoting comments from Koreans and not adding any input. Many fans tend to take what Koreans say at face value and believe those statements to be fact. This series is to help demonstrate that just because you fap to a lot of idols from a certain ethnicity, it doesn't make their netizens any smarter.

People Need to Stop With This Whole 'Kween' Shit

So I was looking under the comments section of CL's "Hello Bitches" because I was looking for a good laugh until I saw this shit:

No. Just no.

Stupid Things Fangirls Utter 84

This is a fangirl who goes overboard about Hani's weight loss.

Stupid Things Fangirls Utter 83

After a long wait, the STFU series finally returns. I had planned to start writing the series earlier after I took over this series from Shinbi and PTS, but graduate school ruins your life during the last few weeks of a semester with all of the group projects, final papers, and final exams to work on.

Anyway, like AKF pointed out, my goal is to have two STFU articles per week on Mondays and Tuesdays and then a new series for Wednesdays. It's the holidays and then I have another internship in January before finishing school in the summer and starting full time after that, so I will also be on a scheduled-post schedule.

Anyway, let's get to it. The first batch of these submissions came from AKF himself as he helped me find some material to get the series rebooted.

Sunday Shitpost #2

Welcome to the second installment of Sunday Shitpost, the series where I tackle a bunch of topics at once.

Oh My Girl couldn't enter the USA and neither can you - a quick primer about performing visas

It's rare that an opportunity for me to drop a post about something extremely topical comes up, but occasionally k-pop will throw me a jewel like that and here one is.  K-pop girl group Oh My Girl had some visa issues recently when attempting to enter the USA and since touring headfucks is an area in which I'm uniquely qualified having managed many of them personally, here is now a quick, helpful trufaxual post for your entertainment and education!

Saturday Shitfest #27

I actually got home just in time to write the Saturday Shitfest article. I have no idea what happened in K-pop this week, so I'll have to catch up tomorrow while I write the Sunday Shitpost article. Anyway, enjoy the birth of the next Hallyu. Moranbang Band is Kim Jong Un's personal band.

Weekly Showdown: Nine Muses Special

[You can check out the results of last showdown here]

So Nine Muses recently marked their third comeback of the year with "Sleepless Night" which, in my opinion, is a pretty good song. Despite the fact that it sounds more like one big fat verse rather the usual verse-prechorus-chorus-bridge, the song has this mysterious feel to it and diverts considerably from their usual sound and the sound of kpop in general. Sure, it's a little monotonous, but weirdly catchy at the same time. Or that's my take on it, anyways. I have seen a lot of positive reactions for this song so far but some people weren't too into it. Two things are for sure though. One, it's definitely not another generic pop release (which there have been a LOT of this year) and two, it's just gonna be slept on again because Nine Muses are unlucky like that. Sigh.

You Don't Always Have to Press 'F'

2015 was a pretty great year in k-pop tbqh, fam. However, it was a pretty bad year if you were in one of the groups mentioned in this here post. Basically, a lot of groups disbanded because they were shit, most likely, or because one of their members got put in jail. I'm going to tell you some groups that disbanded this year and whether you should care. (For full disclosure, a lot of these groups were already pretty inactive, but for the sake of this, I'm just going off ones that officially disbanded this year. For full-full disclosure, any group not mentioned in this post is not even worth mentioning/caring about.)

Fancam Appreciation #12 - f(x)'s Krystal

This week's fancam appreciation focuses on Krystal. There's a 4 Walls fancam after the jump.

Best of the Worst: Dec. 10, 2015

It begins. Year-end lists are starting to roll out for 2015, and with them, so many objectively wrong opinions.

Or in the case of YouTube's most played list, so much bad taste.

A list that is as good as it is diverse

[MV Review] BTS - 'Run'

After some trolling and teasing, BTS close their "Most Beautiful Moments in Life" era with "Run." And it's quite the high note to end on.

Sunday Shitpost #1

Welcome to the newest series (until HYSF reveals his new series once he returns -- it is finals week for him, so no STFUs next week) on AKF! I get to troll you guys already by posting a picture of U-Kiss' Eli. Anyway, the premise of this series will be to have posts like I did back in early 2011 when the blog started. It will contain my signature kinds of articles, all wrapped up into one article. This first installment will be a bit shorter than I wanted because I still need to go back to packing.

Saturday Shitfest #26

After two years, Saturday Shitfest returns! The name of the game is to talk about anything K-pop related. Normally I'll try to briefly cover some news, but not too much since I need to use the good material for the Sunday Shitpost articles. This will most likely be the only Saturday Shitfest that comes out at 12 AM. I'll be working out of town for the next three months, so I'll be getting home at 2 AM every Saturday morning because of my flights. So yeah, honestly, don't expect too many articles from me aside from the scheduled ones for the next three months.

Anyway, let's get the shitfest started!

Fancam Appreciation #11 - Twice's Sana

Today marks the revival of one of my favorite series for plenty of reasons. One, they don't take long to write. Two, you guys can contribute fancams that you want to be featured on here. Three, who doesn't like hot girls (except for homosexuals)?

Guess the Kpopalypse end-of-year lists!

People have asked me for the opportunity to guess the content of my 2015 favourites and 2015 worst-of lists ahead of time, so I've created a short survey for you to enjoy!  Given that the new releases are slowing down in preparation for the Christmas bullshit period, now seems like a good time for you to speculate on what ass-licking music I'm going to throw in my best and worst lists.  The survey will remain active until the official lists are published, and results will be shared in 2016.  Click the caonima below to start the survey, and have fun, everyone!

Jolin Tsai Performs at MAMA

"Mama" indeed. Those tits.

Best of the Worst: Dec. 3, 2015

I stopped playing Laboum's "Aalow Aalow" long enough to put together this Best of the Worst for you, so please read it well.

This week in ridiculous kpop news, we have a singer who really hates Psy, an idol scolding his fans, and Taeyang's disappointment.

No, it wasn't the lack of skinship reciprocation from Seungri.

Why, Luhan, Why

So this happened recently:

Okay, what is it with all these EXO graduates releasing yoloswag bullshit these days? What the fuck has SM been feeding these guys? I thought Luhan would actually go somewhere with his solo career since he's the only one who can actually sing, but then "That Good Good" happened. But you know what, I still had hope in him. I thought, "Maybe it's just a phase." Like that little phase of victory you have when you take a really epic dump, and you feel like you just lost 10kg. Maybe that's what he felt when the burden of being an SM idol was off his shoulders. Maybe. But just when we thought things couldn't get any worse, along came "Lu" to prove us wrong.

Lesson: There's no limit to how bad music can get. Keep your expectations low to the ground so you don't feel too disappointed later.

BoA - Kiss My Lips JP Version

Kiss My Lips is still a great song, but it sounds terrible in Japanese. I am not a fan of groups/artists translating songs because it ruins the lyrical melody of the song. It is always worse going from Korean to Japanese due to how long Japanese words are compared to Korean words, so in songs such as Kiss My Lips and Only One, we get a barrage of extra syllables so that the meaning stays in tact and more English thrown into the song. Who knows, maybe it only bugs someone like me who can understand both languages because I see the usual "this song sounds better in Japanese" crowd posting on YouTube.

The Kpopalypse guide to common k-pop logical fallacies

It seems that many people in the world of the onlinekpoposphere (which is a neat word I invented just now) don't know how to argue correctly, or have trouble picking up on other people when they are constructing arguments without sufficient adherence to trufax.  To aid these people, I've put together the following list of common logical fallacies used in arguments by k-pop fans, netizens and media outlets.  Sure, you can get all this information elsewhere on the Internet, but you should get it here instead, because only the nicest and most awesome people read Kpopalypse posts.

Posting Schedule Update + Commenting Policy Updated

So we're finally instituting the changes I mentioned here and here.

Oh My Girl - Closer + Cupid

Since I've seen a lot of people mention Oh My Girl in the comments here and One Hallyu, I figured that it was time that I finally check them out.

Tips for v-loggers so they can suck less at life

I don't like v-logging and never have.  However I realise that v-logging is a very popular pastime, so I thought it might be helpful if I outline some of the ways in which v-logging could do better, so hopefully all the k-pop v-loggers out there will read this and learn from it and lift the quality of their v-logging and then the world will be a happier place.  Well, okay, that probably won't happen, but what will happen is I will get to write about why I don't like v-logs which will make me feel better and will also probably annoy a lot of people.  If your own v-log was selected for this post, try to look past the usual Kpopalypse tone and take on board the constructive feedback within, won't you?

Happy Thanksgiving

What are you thankful for this year?

Let's appreciate hotness of loli/pedo/fox IU

For all those salty netizens out there, who are to stupid to understand those "subtle" symbols/metaphors/allegories in IU's latest album here's some IU hotness (thanks to awesome people at GQ Korea)

"Lovelyz Don't Have The 'Skills' to Win #1"

So I was reading this article over at Netizebuzz about how Lovelyz had their phones taken away from them until they reach #1. I mean it's pretty obvious that Woolim is just as shitty as every other company in K-Pop when it comes to respecting their idols and it's also obvious that Lovelyz is an amazing group that deserves everything. However this comment just made me laugh:

3. [+129, -40] Do they even think it's fair that a group with their skills and their song wins #1?

[UPDATE] STFU Revived...Fo Relz Dis Tyme

Okay, so I personally made a change to the STFU series by removing someone who had hardly posted in the past three years and replaced her with someone who I thought was the best upcoming author on AKF...and then he went AWOL. Until PTS returns (if he does), I'll be taking over the STFU series.

The best way to contact me is through email: hanyeseul_fag@yahoo.com. Send all of your submissions there. I tried the Twitter and ask.fm thing and didn't like either one of them, so I stopped using those long ago. Don't send any submissions to my Twitter or ask.fm since I'll never see them. Depending on how many responses I get, I'll try to get an STFU post out by the end of the month.

Dara+

It's time for another Kpopalypse fanfiction!

This one's for all you people who are sad that YG and 2NE1 don't get enough attention around these parts.  Read on and be entertained!

CL - Hello Bitches

Whatever you're doing, stop what you're doing and watch this MV right now. It is the best thing you'll have seen in a while.

Yura is an attractive human

Everyone should already know that Yura is awesome, but she still provides us with more evidence.

First, she really, really can draw/paint

#유화재밌다#브이앱보러와요💕

A photo posted by YURA (@yura_936) on Nov 16, 2015 at 5:19am PST

Popu Lady - Gossip Girls

Popu Lady released Gossip Girl yesterday, and it may be their last song as a five-member group. I'm sure after seeing how well f(x) has been received as a four-member group, maybe Popu Lady thinks they can kick out their own Sulli.

The song is alright. It deviates from the saccharine sound they are known for, but their pre-release tracks were better, especially this song. At the very least, they all look really hot in the MV.

Best of the Worst: Nov. 19, 2015

I was sitting alone in my room today, like I often do, meticulously Photoshopping my favorite Exo members into "Star Wars" scenes, when I thought to myself: "There's got to be an easier way for a girl to fulfill her Exo/'Star Wars' fetish."

Thankfully, SM and Disney — in an unholy collaboration for the ages — recently gifted us with this not-at-all-creepy photoshoot:

This pic alone is enough to supply
my prolific fanfic writing for the next decade.

Just think of all the role playing ...

and lightsaber crossing ...

Bebop's drummer is kinda hot

Anyone remember "k-rock" band Bebop?

Those hot girls had quite a nice song last year:

EXID - Hot Pink

EXID released Hot Pink. It sucks.

Kpopalypse Nugu Alert Episode 15: A-Daily, The Starz, Pride Band

That's right caonimas, it's time for another episode of:

This will be the final Nugu Alert for 2015!  Let's round up the year's final bunch of nugus for your appreciation and entertainment!

AOA are hot Santas

Apparently, AOA is endorsing some random company called BC Card. I have no idea what this company does, and to be honest I don't care, as long as they provide us with such glorious content.

I hope more hot girl groups will dress as hot Santas.

Big boobs in k-pop guide part 3 - private parts investigations

In the never ending quest to determine boob size, Kpopalypse is back with the third big boobs in k-pop post!  Several new busty entrants in k-pop have appeared, plus there are still many existing idols who have not been covered.  Come on another journey into (or perhaps between) the breasts of your favourite Korean idols!

Be warned - this post is bigger than Qri's implants, so it might lag a little on slower devices, like netizens' brains.  Proceed with caution!

Seolhyun Needs to Learn from Namjoo

If you are a regular reader of Netizen Buzz and/or K-Pop, K-Fans, you probably noticed the 30 articles about Seolhyun every week. Naturally, Seolhyun would have an interview that addresses the comments about her.

Best of the Worst: Nov. 12, 2015

Hello again, friends, and apologies for skipping out on last week's Best of the Worst. We're back with this week's shittiest kpop news, including someone who likes Namjoo a little too much, a girl group who wants you to calm the fuck down at the airport, and idols who look cute in glasses:

Hyominnie didn't make the list, but she should have.

Haeryung's Coming For Your Penis

I have been watching a few recent fancams of Haeryung and was trying to figure out why she seemed much hotter than usual.

Weekly Showdown: Twice VS. CLC

So JYP's  much anticipated rookie girl group, Twice, recently made its debut with the song "Like OOH-AHH." I didn't really like the song the first few times I heard it, but it eventually grew on me. It's not great, but it's pretty catchy and fun. I decided I'd put Twice against CLC for best debut, since these were two of the "better" debuts that happened recently.

(You can go ahead and check out last showdown's, Armpit Hair VS. No Armpit Hair, results here. I assure you you'll have lots of fun.)

For me, both songs were pretty good, but I'll have to go with "Pepe." It's just a better song in general. Drop a vote below for your favorite debut! I'm pretty sure a lot of you are gonna vote for Twice since their visuals are like holy-fucking-shit impressive. And on the other hand, there's Sorn ... *sigh* 

Twice's "Like Ooh-Ahh" or CLC's "Pepe"?

Twice - "Like OOH-AHH"

CLC - "Pepe"

Poll Maker

IU's apology - first draft

Hello. This is IU.

[MV Review] Rania - Demonstrate

Rania demonstrates why it should disband because this fucking song sucks.

What do the lyrics of BEG's new song even mean?

Brown Eyed Girls recently came back after a two year break with "Brave New World". The first time I heard the song, I was like 'what the actual fuck is this shit'. It sounded like one of those many disjointed messes in Kpop that just make you wanna scrunch your face up in disgust. The second time I heard it though, it wasn't as bad, and the third, I fell in love. This song is so fucking good. Although I gotta say I am disappointed with the Miryo rap break. I think it started out okay but halfway through her flow disappeared into thin air. Nonetheless, I kept replaying this song, and I'm not the type of person to replay songs so that's saying something.

The Male Idols You Wanted More Of

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Understanding plagiarism and song ownership issues so you don't look like a fuckhead on the Internet

A couple years ago I wrote this post and then this other post about plagiarism in k-pop, to help the people I encounter understand the basics of what plagiarism is and is not.  I still gets tons of questions every time a new k-pop plagiarism or song ownership dispute appears, which seems to be about once per week lately.  So in the spirit of "teach a man to fish rather than slap them across the face with a fish", as well as the spirit of "please stop asking me these stupid fucking questions because nobody cares", Kpopalypse now brings to you a nice, simple guide to finding plagiarism in your favourite k-pop songs!  Yay!

Black K-pop Idol Lives Matter

So we have a K-pop idol who is now black, so that means Korean police officers (such as Girl's Day) need to be on the lookout.

An introduction to k-pop music genres part 2 - more stuff and things

Recently I did a post about some of the different music genres that are explored by k-pop.  Although it wasn’t supposed to be a complete list, people still complained anyway about me leaving out their favourite genres (along with their other usual complaints).  The smarter readers would have realised that I left certain genres out for a reason, but there were a few genuine oversights that I probably should have covered.  Also, I started getting questions like this:

I thought it would be fun (for me and people who enjoyed the previous post) and annoying (for everyone else) to revisit the topic of music genres and go through some genres that k-pop explores but which I didn’t cover before.  Let’s do it!

UCAAD Joins Rania

Uh, remember what I said during the SM Audition article the other day? That applies to a company like SM, but if you're not East Asian with light skin, and especially if you're not Asian at all, NOW YOU HAVE A SLIVER OF HOPE!

Yes, your sliver of hope is now joining desperate nugu groups where the likelihood is that you won't make any money.

Thighrene

'Nuff said.

Original performance.

SM to Hold Global Auditions - Will You be the Next Hallyu Star?

Do you have what it takes?!

Suzy is no longer miss A's fat whore as Min transforms into Shindong

Alright, now it's time to praise Suzy after you see Min's transformation into Shindong below the jump.