Things Kpopalypse dislikes in music: k-pop ballads

It's well known that Kpopalypse doesn't like k-pop ballads, but why?  What is it about ballads that makes them suck so much?  Are there any good ballads?  If so, what makes a good ballad good, and a bad ballad bad?  Can ballads be bad meaning good?  Read on as Kpopalypse explores the trufax about k-pop ballads!

Even SM the Ballad is Bored of SM the Ballad

The song/album is so boring, the people in it trying to sing the song can't be bothered to give a shit.

The boys are all high out of their minds and Taeyeon has a look of utter despair on her face. Her eyes scream, "KILL ME PLS" but no one can hear her.

Actually, the only one who's mustering a semi-positive emotion is Krystal... But that's probably because she's thinking, "LOL THIS SONG SUCKS COCK BUT AT LEAST I'M GETTING PAID TO JUST LOOK GOOD AND NOT SING IT ANYWAY."

That method acting tho.