Monday, April 9, 2012

[MV Review] SHINee - Sherlock

AFTER YEARS OF WAITING, MY DARLING TAEMINNIE AND DUBULGE AND MINHO AND DIVAKEY AND DINOJONG HAVE RETURNED TO KOREA TO MAKE ALL THE NOONAS' PANTIES MOIST~~~~~


I LITERALLY CAME BUCKETS FOR THE TEASER PICS (FUCK YOU SM FOR NOT RELEASING THOSE ON TIME BTW), AND WHEN SM FINALLY RELEASED THE MV (FUCK YOU SM FOR DELAYING THE MV TOO OMG NO ONE ELSE HAS TO DEAL WITH THIS SHIT NOT SUJU NOT SNSD WAE. FUCK EXO). PLZ READ MY REVIEW~~~~


So now that I've vented and calmed my titties down a bit, I'm ready to get on with the review. SHINee's flawless comeback is obviously the best SM has to offer and is completely a jjangbak storyline MV with so much jjangbak closeups and dancing I nearly rubbed all the skin off my vagina when I was watching it~

SHINee reading this review right now, omomo
To explain because the MV is so complex and deep it's like watching a movie omo: SHINee are cosplaying as detectives and they look sooooo kwiyeo in their little suits I just want to bite them, especially little Taeminnie. Because they're just as jjangbak #1 detectives as they are idols, they've been asked to find some jewelry stolen from the museum. Even though they totally didn't need it, that plastic slutbag piece of shit horse from SNSD shows up to give my little babies hints. Probably just wants them to fuck her, she's so horny even death can't stop her from wanting to get fucked but she doesn't know they're pure and innocent and only I get to show them a true woman's pleasures. Ugh. Anyway, SHINee find where the jewelry is hidden and are the heroes~ At the end, super smart divaKey realizes that fucking whore-sica was some kind of skankghost bitch.

FUCK THAT BITCH, HOW DARE SHE TRY TO SEDUCE MY TAEMIN
To make this MV even more jjangbak, SHINee keeps up their amazing dance skills and complexity by making Sherlock's dance super cool and hard (I would know, my friends and I worked so hard to cover this and put it on Youtube, plz watch and comment no haters). Here are the best parts:

Unf unf look at that chain body roll. I bet they move just like that IN BED~

SHINee = dance machines, so they included a megazord sequence omomomo

Only SHINee has the swag to make a bunny hop and skip look so fierce~

FIST ME TIL I BLEED
Everyone looks good in their outfits and hair especially Taemin omo. He makes me go so pedonoona but I can't help it. He looks so pretty with his long hair, even prettier than me omomomo waeeeeeeeeeee. I want to braid his hair all pretty so then it'd a wavy mess of gorgeous hair and asiudfnalaasdfklj. He gives me so many feels I want Taemin to eat me out. I want his lips around my throbbing clitoris, his beautiful fingers thrusting inside my wet, dripping pussy. I want his tongue tracing over my folds teasingly, flicking over over my clitoris and lapping up my juices like a little kitten. I want to hear him purr and hum down there, pleasing me with the sensation of his mouth overpowering my womanhood. All I want is Taemin to push me against a wall and fuck me hard. He'll whisper dirty things into my ear with his husky voice and hear him moan "NOONA"

WAE ARE YOU SO PRETTY
The song itself is so jjangbak but you already know that unless you're a jealous hater and a troll so gtfo.

TL;DR:
UNF UNF UNF UNF UNF UNF CUM TO NOONA

I give this song a flawless jjangbak 212381293 out of 5 because they're so jjangbak.

18 comments:

  1. I thought the dance makes them look dumb tbh.

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  2. Lmao Zaku. This sounds exactly like the shit Shawols would say on tumblr and twitter.

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    1. Some of it was quoted word for word off a "Dirty SHINee Confession" tumblr.

      I'll let you guess which parts, olololo

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  3. you know, deep down, Zaku is a hidden Shawol

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  4. Shit, that's the EXACT SAME STUFF I had to read the past week.

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  5. This shit was so accurate it's scary. Anyways this is probably their worst dance yet. The chorus is just... :|

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  6. Too much information at the end there :)

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  7. The chorus reminds me vaguely of some 90s era cartoon theme for whatever reason. I didn't mind it.

    But anyway this MV is actually catered to the pedo-hyungs, not the pedo-noonas. This may even top Fantastic Baby as the gayest MV this year.

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  8. And the worst part is how accurate all that was.... Shawols don't have their bad reputation for nothing.

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  9. I don't fucking understand how the SM stylists finally managed to make Jonghyun look ugly.

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  10. omo I think I just cum. Taeminnie is my #1 pedo-object

    trolololol

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  11. "OH I'M CURIOUS YEAH"
    No, just no.
    Also as much as I love SHINee, Sherlock was very disappointing.

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  12. I liked the MV but just because you like SHINee doesn't mean you have to hate Jessica~~ :( she's so pretty^^ ~ :D You wouldn't want people saying things like you are saying to her if you were invited to be in a SHINee MV right?? o.O

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