Link to Part One.
The story so far: AKF had gone to Taiwan to have an orgy with Popu Lady, but he was raped by a fat prostitute that had every STD known to man. AKF tried committing suicide, but the Cyclops Overlord saved him. AKF then went to Korea to search for this mythical creature, but ended up getting sucked up in a f(x)/SNSD conspiracy plot with Kpopalypse that ended up with AKF blowing himself up, taking out Brave Brothers. AKF and Brave Brothers return to Earth, and AKF was on his journey of finding a replacement penis. At last, AKF found a match, but it was none other than Johnny Noh.
"Well, I'd fuck him to death but with this tiny dick, I'd just be tickling his fucking asshole!" AKF indignantly exclaimed. "YOU'RE A DICK!"
"It's alright," Brave Brothers explained. "The important thing is that you have a dick. Given how fucked up this world is, I'm sure we can find a way to restore it to a normal size."
"Yeah, there has to be someone who can help, but it's probably a girl who takes pity on me after seeing my new penis," said AKF as he sighed.
A white light from above flashed in the room. After the light dissipated, Kpopalypse emerged. AKF had a weird look on his face. "I thought you were going to stay in heaven and bang Raina for eternity," said AKF.
"I wish I could have," said Kpopalypse as he took off his hat, placed it across his chest, and looked solemnly towards the ground. "She overdosed on my jizz," he said with a tear coming out of his left eye.
"My god," replied AKF as he also shed a tear. "That reminds me of my friend Lin who unfortunately died the same way. She desperately wanted to be a K-pop idol and joined YG entertainment. However, to have a chance at joining Black Pink, she had to suck off Yang Hyun Suk a lot. She got so used to the jizz that she had all of the male idols and trainees bukkake her, and she overdosed on all of that jizz."
AKF walked over towards Kpopalypse and put his hand on Kpopalypse's shoulder. "Your heart will heal in time," said AKF.
"Did yours ever heal?" asked Kpopalypse.
"It healed about ten minutes ago when God was an asshole and gave me Johnny Noh's fucking tiny-as-shit MICROPENIS!" yelled AKF. "I realized that even if I could get with her now, it would just be like a lesbian relationship! I can't penetrate anyone with this microscopic piece of skin! She'd have to peg me for any kind of penetrative sex! That's how I got over it!"
"Relax," Kpopalypse said. "As our friend Ahjussi has always told us, you need the technique of 12 play."
"What do you mean by that?" asked AKF.
"It just means that you have to be able to eat pussy better than a fucking dyke," replied Kpopalypse.
"And I have the perfect target for you, AKF," said Brave Brothers as he held up a CD of AOA's "Heart Attack" album. "I need your help in trying to get AOA to use my songs again. My contract ended with "Heart Attack" and I need my easy money making source back."
"Well, I get to eat out Seolhyun, so I guess this is a win-win for us!" said AKF.
"And I get to fuck the living shit out of Chanmi!" exclaimed Kpopalypse.
"If I could get a boner with this tiny-ass dick, it would be deflated right now," said AKF. "But at least we rarely like the same girls in a group, so you're always the perfect companion for these adventures!"
"Someone has to pork the fatties," said Kpopalypse with a grin.