Friday, March 8, 2013

[MV Review] Nine Muses - Dolls

Late as fuck, here we go.

Nine Muse's latest Sweetune collaboration is pretty boring man. The MV is just your simple dance-in-a-box affair with a smattering of closeups to spice things up.

I'm having a hard time finding good things to say about this MV because with this type of concept, you're really putting all your eggs into one basket. Song aside, the MV is being sold on the basis of visual appeal, more specifically the strength of the choreography and the hotness of the idols. Unfortunately, nothing particularly stands out about the cinematography or the choreography. I went ahead and GIF'ed some of the nicer parts of it for ya.

This swing shit is the point dance. I think.
If not, then this ass shake is. No biscuits. :/
Here's a body roll for good measure though.
As you can tell, there's not much spice in the choreography this time around and that's kinda disappointing. I mean sure it's hard to choreograph for nine girls of varying dance ability, but if another group with nine girls *coughcough* of varying ability (and I use the word "ability" very loosely) can get some decent shit out, I'm sure Nine Muses can do the same.

However, I will give bonus points to Nine Muses for including a very AKB48 Heavy Rotation-inspired set of scenes in the MV. It's pretty much the only redeeming part of this MV, and that's saying something that a rehash of something those damned dirty Japs have done already would be what saves it.

Hrm, the boring safe-for-prudish-Korean-consumption version of AKB48's sexy lingerie
slumber party? Nah, couldn't be.
All this lesbian subtext has nothing to do with the MV, the song, or the concept,
but LBR: who gives a fuck?
On the visual side of things, the girls look decent enough (+1 for Kyungri, and you can thank one of my followers for spamming my feed with her often enough for me to recognize her. You know who you are.) but the whole blazer + dress shirt + tie + short shorts is really getting stale. Besides, those bully-dol T-ara girls wore that shit while they were allegedly gangbanging mistreating Hwayoung. We don't associate with those improper role models around here. :D There's also a very strange trend I noticed with Nine Muses and their random closeup cuts. Either their directors really have a fetish for seeing girls trapped in mirror boxes, or the girls themselves really like being stuck in the damn mirror boxes themselves.

4Minute would like to have words with them.
The song itself is more of the same. It seems like Sweetune is determined to carve out a niche for Nine Muses as those girls who insist on using the same brassy big band instrumentals in their Kpops. Not necessarily a bad thing, because a unique or at least readily recognizable style in this oversaturated market is a premium, but I would have liked to see them experiment more. Ticket and News were fantastic songs, but Dolls is kind of a let down.

The chorus is fairly nice and catchy, but I really really don't like the rap break they shoved in here. Who even raps over this kind of instrumental? There's no build-up or careful transition towards a rap break, and the rap itself isn't even that great.

Go listen to News or Ticket instead.

  • Kyungri
  • Heavy Rotation
  • nice chorus
  • boring MV
  • boring outfits
  • boring song
  • shitty rap break
I give this song a 2.75 out of 5, only cause of Kyungri and I found the Heavy Rotation ripoff funny.


  1. +

  2. Despite my total indifference to Jpop i have to admit that AKB48 did the sexy lingerie slumber party much better. Probably because the distant shot made their ugly as fuck teeth not so visible.

  3. If they aim for jazz, they need to step up the drum work. The "wah" guitar isn't gonna save them from a lazy drum machine. I found that the song breaks its highs around 1:10. tsk tsk tsk.
    Very typical voice directing for a kpop song, as zaku says, it's boring.
    Not what nine muses need, now when all the other big-shot girl groups are too busy preparing, to garner attention.

  4. Surprisingly this song was their highest charting to date. I personally like the song, but this song plays it too safe and becomes forgettable in the crowd of idols. They have their distinct retro sound but they definitely need more promotions this year. They could have used their momentum from News --> Ticket, but I don't know what happened. (Saem and Euaerin were missing from the group during summer? I think when they were doing small performances.)

  5. I lurve heavy rotation!

    And dammit! No one gives a shit about box videos, so late 2011!