Ah, we're all trying to forget about this Ice Bucket Challenge shit now aren't we, now that the trend has run its course. Everyone except me, naturally. Kpopalypse is always absolutely fine with being hated so is only too happy to publish an Ice Bucket Challenge post when you're as least receptive to hearing about it as possible. Of course I couldn't post about this back when it was trendy because people were still making the videos. Now everyone's basically given up and moved onto whatever the newest viral trend is, it's time to collect 'em up.
A few fun points before we begin:
- I'm very pro-Ice Bucket Challenge (hereafter referred to as IBC to save typing) - and who isn't? Money being raised to fight a terrible disease through the virtuous means of providing fap material? I fail to see a loser in this equation. A few people complained about it of course because complaining about things on the Internet is apparently even trendier than tipping buckets of iced water over your head was in August 2014, but they were just being hipsters and hating on something because it was popular. The best rationale haters could come up with was something about the money not going to the right place, which of course was total bullshit, but unfortunately didn't stop people sharing the myths on SNS anyway like a bunch of stupid sheep. Oh, and some laughable nonsense about "wasting water"... which is nothing compared to all the wasted jizz from the extra fapping that it generated.
- The whole point of the IBC was to raise awareness of Lou Gehring's Disease, which is a pretty fucked up neural disease that people can get, that is bad and kills people and that there is no cure for at this time which is even more reason for you not to be a complaining cunt about it. At least you don't have the fucking disease and I don't see anyone with the disease complaining about ice buckets. Apparently the physical sensation of the disease can make you feel like you've had a bucket of iced water tipped on you, hence the connection between raising money for the disease and girls getting wet - someone over at the ALS Association definitely had their fucking thinking cap on the day they thought up this shit. This completely justifies me compiling the following list of girls getting their boobs wet so shut up.
- I couldn't find a video of every single female idol out there who I know did this, so there's probably a few gaps to be filled. If you know of any that I've missed feel free to link me to their videos in the comments below and I won't add them to the blog post because I'm too lazy but I'm sure someone else will be grateful.
- I'm not featuring any guys (although some are incidentally in the videos anyway) because it would make this list too long as far more guys did it than girls so I prioritised what was relevant to me personally which is girls, but if any of you bloggers out there wanna make an all-guy list so you can fap then you should go right ahead and I may even link to you. Also, Shindong didn't even do one despite being called out.by other Super Junior members, and if I can't include "the Dong" then honestly there's just no point.
- Because I'm Kpopalypse I write about k-pop so only people related to the world of k-pop are eligible. No k-drama stars who have never sung a song etc.
- "But there's no ice in the bucket" - think I give a fuck? I think a lot of them interpreted it as "Iced Bucket Challenge" (i.e water that is icy cold rather than with actual ice cubes) but who cares anyway. You can have the conversation about lack of frozen cubes in the comments if you really must, I'm just here for the boobs.
Ailee's commitment to the cause of getting her shirt wet is impressive even though we've all already seen her boobs but I'm certainly not complaining about having more of a good thing. She even wears a white top which is great, pity she wears a thick bikini top underneath it and her boobs are covered by either her hands or a towel for the duration. Still, Johnny Noh is an asshole so I'm going to give Ailee an 8.
Juniel may know how to use a Shure Super 55 correctly but she still hunches over like a leper when the iced water hits her, ensuring that fap value is drastically minimised. She's nugu enough to have ignored the IBC completely however, plus she seems genuinely shell-shocked at the end of the video so she gets 8 just for being a sport and doing something that I'm sure was her pervy manager's idea.
The boring, sexually conservative concern-trolls that are k-pop's netizens didn't like Hyosung's IBC because they felt it was too sexually provocative. A complete fucking joke of course when most western celebs did IBCs that looked like this, but netizens are never ones to let logic and facts get in the way of a good bit of female idol-bashing. I agree with them on one point though - netizens say that Hyosung shouldn't have been wearing the black bra under the white t-shirt because it shows too much. I agree with them, no bra at all would have been much better! Hyosung still gets an 8 anyway for pissing off Internet idiots which is always good.
Chocolat are one of those groups that have been around for ages and that will never get anywhere. Everyone has heard of Chocolat as "that group that has been around for ages and that I don't actually listen to but gee I like posting their 'Black Tinkerbell' song on forums just to troll", but that's okay because IBC is for nugus too! Tia gets an 8 just for furthering the cause of nugu equal rights and no other reason.
Flanelette shirt, really? You're in the world's biggest k-pop group, not Nirvana, you fucking twit - dress like it, dammit. Still she does look cute anyway and this video made me realise just how often I confuse Yuri for Seohyun so it was educational for me and I think that's worthy of an 8.
Minah has a firm commitment to iced water, dumping on her own head what seems to be the drip tray from her refrigerator. Why's she on her own though, why isn't that sports jock boyfriend of hers soaking her? Maybe he's too busy soaking Yura on the side. Minah can have an 8 because even though she's wearing black so I can't see shit I still feel sorry for any girl so obviously being cheated on, especially after she worked so hard to get laid in the first place.
Ferlyn, one of the Singaporean members from Skarf was called out by Tiny-G's Mint but actually does her video in the opposite style to Mint, making it as long-ass as possible. She even fucks the whole ALS cause off, instead talking about a local Singaporean issue of helping out street dogs, effectively promoting two causes at once (because people will associate it with ALS anyway so they might donate to both) AND getting her boobs wet. What a fucking champ, now that's thinking outside the square. Only giving her an 8 though because this video is so bright that I can't even see what effect the water has, also the guy's bucket-tipping skills are really lame. But she's still ace.
Baek Ji Young isn't much younger than I am, proving that it's okay for old fucks to do this shit too. Anyway she's great, dressing appropriately and not wussing out. However I can only give her an 8 because the aspect ratio of this video is so completely fucked that it's nearly unwatchable. Why can't you kids who upload things to the Internet get this shit right?
These girls are hot... but AGAIN with the black clothes, outdoors at night, whyyyyyyyyyyyy.... I'll give them an 8 anyway just to encourage them to do better next time an Internet fad comes along involving wet shirts.
Too much white can sometimes be a bad thing - this is just a little too over-exposed so you can't really see any relevant detail. The gratuitous squirting however is great so this still gets an 8.
Speaking of batshit crazy religious nutters, Sunye's currently being a missionary in Haiti poisoning the local population's minds by shoving down their throats some shitty organised religion nobody cares about but at least took the time out of her busy schedule of emotionally manipulating the locals to let some guys tip iced water over her head which is kind of cool and restores my faith in humanity slightly so have an 8, Sunye.
That little pan that Lim is holding doesn't really meet minimum required "bucket" standards, but then she probably knows this because video comments have been disabled. There was probably a ton of "where's the bucket" comments she had to endure so I'll give her an 8 because I'm feeling sympathetic.
The shortest, crappiest IBC video ever - it's at night, outdoors, she's wearing black and it only goes for four fucking seconds... hell, I'm only taking it on good faith that it's even Sunmi in the video, for all I know it's some coffee-machine-changing intern with a similar hairstyle. Still it's a pretty hot intern so have an 8 anyway, Sunmi or whoever you are.
Kara's Seungyeon has obviously been reading Kpopalypse blog because she's wearing a correctly-proportioned striped top - however it's a bit too loose to get full marks so she only gets an 8. Also a missed opportunity to pull her weight as a veteran member and make new member Youngji do the IBC.
Younha's IBC is so cube-heavy and with the cubes dropped from such a height that I'm amazed she didn't get concussed by the event, have an 8 for exhibiting cranial fortitude.
JuB is dressed really nicely for this shit with some sexy office wear. The top is black though, plus it's at night - I'm convinced that this is some fap-prevention conspiracy. Forget your Illuminatis and your One World Governments (and for those wanting me to blog about any of those wacko conspiracy nuts - no fucking way, Kpopalypse will not even consider it, let's not give those pieces of shit any more attention), it's the black tops for IBCs that we really need to fight. 8 anyway because she's a babe.
These two don't have JuB's fashion sense and of course they wear fucking black but at least they scream appropriately and seem to be going through discomfort which they totally deserve for wearing the wrong type of clothing for this, so they can have an 8 because justice is served.
LE looks great here. How come she never looks anywhere near this good in any music videos? This revelation is almost enough to compensate for the... once again... wearing black outdoors at night, so let's give her an 8 just to show that we care. Also she didn't bust out a rap while getting soaked which is a plus.
Hani performs her IBC in the same setting as LE but wears something slightly more appropriate colour-wise, but less clingy. The positives and the negatives counterbalance each other so it's only fair that she also gets an 8.
Hey this one's great - outdoors in the daytime, with a nice light-coloured top, several other IBCers could learn from this. Pity the camera's so fucking far away that I can't even see anything. Have an 8 anyway for at least getting most of the important points right.
A whole fucking nugu group decided to do the IBC, on a stage no less, while wearing "cute concept" (read: fap concept) clothing - that's white! Rejoice! PIty that the video fades out just a little too soon so we don't get to see much, but I'll still give this an 8.
The gods of luck were smiling on me the day that Simon and Martina played "rock paper scissors" to decide who was going to get the iced water on their head. Martina lost so I got to see her boobs get wet AND lots of fanservicey slow-motion bouncing which I really appreciated. However she's wearing the wrong fucking colour of course, I really wanted to give you guys a higher score than 8 to troll everyone because I know how much EYK divides opinions around these k-pop blogging parts but I'm sorry. I can't do it. You guys must try harder to give boob fanservice. 8 for you until you do a reshoot with a clingy white t-shirt (you know you want to, Martina - if you do one, so will I, I don't give a fuck that the trend has already died in the ass and the ALS foundation are probably now making two cents per day).
Clara did actually make a k-pop debut so she does count for this and it's just as well. You can tell that Clara is a model with lots of experience under her belt (and over her belt) and she gets a 10 because she's a pro who shows everyone how it's done. Light coloured top that is clingy, outdoors, during the daytime, doesn't hunch over when hit with the ice but realises that we're watching this to see her pert boobies get wet so she maintains good posture and looks unfazed. She's probably done this already dozens of times. Thank you Clara for showing the k-pop world that boobs matter.
Boobs were shown and money was raised to fight a terrible disease, it's a win/win strong enough to bring a tear to the eye. That's all for now, rest assured that the next time some pervy trend sweeps the k-pop world, Kpopalypse will be there to cover it in unnecessarily creepy detail!