Saturday, November 1, 2014

[Review] Zhou Mi "Rewind"

Watch as Zhou Mi solos it.




I like to like Zhou Mi. I've liked to like him since I first saw him in Super Junior-M's 2009 masterpiece "Super Girl."




So when SM announced that he would be its latest male to go solo, I was mildly excited, even though I thought a Zhou Mi solo was unnecessary.


Was anyone really asking for Zhou Mi half-nudes?
'Cause I don't think they were.


SM released both Korean and Chinese versions of "Rewind." This review focuses on the Chinese version. It naturally flows better, and the rap by its respective Exo member is almost tolerable if I mute the video and squint really hard at the screen.

The song starts off pleasantly enough. It has a distinct beat, and Zhou Mi's whisper singing isn't terrible.


Although his pants are


Then about 25 seconds in, this cheering starts: "Hey, hey, hey, hey, hey." It reminds me of a sitcom laughtrack. It's like the composers also weren't confident anyone would get excited for a Zhou Mi solo, so they infused the song with fake enthusiasm.

Maybe people would be more excited if the music video didn't look like this:


Fuck yeah, let's get this party started!


Once the chorus starts, everything positive about the song disappears, and darkness sets in. Oh wait, that's not darkness. It's blandness. As one might expect, "Rewind" is just another SM throwaway R&B filler.

By the time the second verse kicks in, I begin to hope for the chanting to return to keep me awake. Luckily, the composers were more intuitive than I initially gave them credit for. They interspersed the chant throughout the rest of the song. That might be the only thing that kept me going to the end.


My face during the closing shot


BOTTOM LINE: Zhou Mi deserves better than this, and I want to rewind the last few minutes of my life.



9 comments:

  1. Wtf was that cocaine she was sprinkling over him?

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    Replies
    1. Lol, whatever it was, he wasn't having any of that shit.

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  2. i dont know what the hell is wrong with me, but when they do those face shot slow mo things, i laugh my ass off everytime.

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  3. zhou mi has tremendous charisma, very long legs and quite a bit of skill. i'm so disappointed that none of these things came through :|

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  4. This comment has been removed by the author.

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  5. His face always reminds me of Sheeteuk.

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  6. LOL why did you cover up Jessica?

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    Replies
    1. I'm protecting the children from "The One Whose Name Must Not Be Spoken."

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