Saturday, September 3, 2011

The K-pop dictionary (fangirl edition).

Doing this cause doing normal entries are fucking boring.


Your latest album was shit biatch.


Daebak/Jjang - I'm a Koreaboo, I look so damn cute when I say this when my oppar and unnirs release shitty songs + MV's and win awards because we bulk buy the fuck outta it + I'm a delusional stan hence I shall praise it to high heavens or else my fandom shall eat me alive kekekekekekekekekekekeke motherfucking ke. ^.^ + I use this word when I waste 5 hours trending oppar's/unnir's name on twitter for his/her birthday instead of doing my h/w, it's okay as long as mommy doesn't know.

Oppa - I shall abuse the living fuck out of this word because it's soooooooooooo damn kawaii...hold on that's Japanese my bad kekekekekekeke cute and I shall also refer to the male fans in the forums and articles as oppa cause I'm cool like that kekekekekekekekeke. ^.^.

 I also get mad when people mock us and use the ever-so-insulting term 'oppar' instead of 'oppa', like get it right pfft. Oh hold on a sec I use that myself kekekekekekeke.

My use of 'kekeke' is as fake as Nicki Minaj's ass, js.


E.g. Daebak people on Tumblr making these jjang
 gifs ^.^












Unnie - Although I dislike half the chicks in K-pop cause they so purdy and they probably fuck my oppas I shall call them unnie in an aegyo voice while I secretly hate them cause they sell more than my oppas ;_____________;. Shall refer to every older female on the forums/blogs etc in order to look cute and adorable. Now give me a fucking cookie.

Saranghaeyo - Hehe, this is the first phrase in Korean that I learned through cheesy K-dramas which translates to the 3 obvious words everyone dreads irl, however saying in Korean obviously makes it 100 x cooler, durrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr. I don't mind the fact this is the most over-used phrase in sappy love songs in K-pop.

E.g. the moron below.















Troll - You don't like oppar/unnir so that means you're a troll. You may have a valid reason as to why you don't like oppar/unnir but I don't care *sings along with 2NE1* because you're a troll.

Haters gonna hate/U mad? - I can't take an opinion & I obviously cannot come up with a proper argument atm seeing that my retaliation would come across as weak or simply because I'm lazy like Snorlax, henceforth I shall spam macros/gifs with this particular caption in order to look like a faux badass kekekekekekekekekekekekekeke ^__^

E.g. A regular K-pop fan shares his/her honest opinion about your oppar (in this case 2pm) : 'Wow they suck live!'

Over-sensitive stan :




















Hwaiting/Fighting - Although this is used by Koreans I obviously wish that I was one. Oh well I shall use this phrase every chance I get.

Jpop - Utter garbage. I don't know why fucking weeaboos listen to this shit. So many idol groups filled with pretty boys and girls who can't sing for shit (sans a few members in each group)...Oh wait, that sounds like Kpop idol groups....uhh....at least my oppars and unnirs are better dancers!!!!111oneone

Aegyo - Ewwwwwwwwwwww I hate it when those bitches from girl groups do aegyo to look cute like act yo facking age you fake ass hoes!!!!!! Get away from my oppar too okay?

Aigoo - I use this when my oppar/unnir fall sick or end up in the hospital cause they're overworked and aigoooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo SM is so evil, his whisper is tha fucking luciferrrrrrrrrr!!!!!oneone.

Omo! - Omg is as outdated as your mum's wardrobe, pfft. It's all about doing aegyo and saying 'Omooooooooooo!' Hey at least I don't add a 'h' in front of it and say that out loud, hence KISS MY FEET BEECHFACE.

Fanwar - AHMAGAWDDDDDDD. Where do I even begin? It's my favourite part of Korean pop culture of course! This is where I put 90% of my energy on defending my beloved oppars and unnirs cause they obviously don't deserve all the hate because they work so hard and barely get paid much or get any sleep poor little things and oh bitch pleaseeeeeeeeeeee I don't care if my mum and dad work hard to support me and buy me things, like my oppars and unnies work a lot harder duhhhhhhhhhhh  *brb buying 10 albums on YesAsia/DVDHeaven using Dad's money keke* ! ;______;  and those people who don't like them are just stooooopid haters eww. I also need this to enlarge my e-penor of course!

Dubulge  - Hehe this term refers to Onew's penis, which according to Shawols is considered humongous. Man these Onew dickriders have never seen a dick in their entire life, maybe they should ask JYP ahjusshi to show them his gigantic package. Yes, he has a reproductive organ lets all kill him.

Maknae - Youngins that aren't legal yet but we'd like to bang the shit out of them regardless, who the fuck cares about jail?

Ahjusshi - Old perverted men that fanboy over SNSD & Kara ofc! Eww no wonder I don't like girl groups!!!!!!!!! They make me sick *goes to throw up in a hat*

Chocolate Abs - lol silly! It's not abs made out of milk chocolate! Pfft, whenever I see guys in movies and magazines with abs I always think to myself 'Kekekeke his abs are NOTHING compared to Taeyang/Jay Park/Chanslut/Lee Joon oppar's delicious chocolate abs'. OPPA LEMME LICK YOUR ABS PLEASE? I DON'T CARE EH EH EH EH EH IF YOU HAVEN'T SHOWERED IN A MONTH. SARANGHAE <3

Bagel Girl - Okay I know you think these slutbags sell bagels for a living but it's not true! They're basically sluts who have a 'baby face' and have a body that's voluptuous for Korean standards. Like they have that alien bitch UEE considered a bagel girl. Wtf are they smoking? Snooki's shit? Maybe, maybe not. If my oppar looks at these bitches in a more than a friendly way I shall cut that bitch into pieces and make sushi outta her boobies. COME AT ME BRO.

Honey Thighs - Ugh, such bullshit. Like who are y'all kidding huh? They obviously look good with photoshop, lighting and layers of make-up!!!!!!!oneone

Without them they ALL look like Hyuna's fugly cellulite ridden thighs omg.




 -------

*phew*

Imitating your typical fangirl is a lot harder than I thought.
Props to you guys.

Not going to enroll in the K-pop school of fangirlology any time soon.

Thanks for the contribution Anti Kpop-Fangirl! 

54 comments:

  1. What does Stan mean? I've seen it used like the word bias, but what is its pedigree?

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  2. I love you Suckmydee! <3

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  3. dubulge? what the flying fuck?

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  4. ^http://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=stan

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  5. Nicki Minaj, moron & G.NA gifs = TROLOLOL!!!!!!

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  6. i like ahjusshi's little cameo in this article lol

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  7. lol what is dubulge?!?!

    lol but i did LOL pretty hard, this one is great.

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  8. I hate it when ignorant people label anyone who disagrees with their opinion a "troll".

    Person 1: Anyone who thinks Rebecca Black can sing is either tone deaf or just drunk
    Person 2: Give her a f*cking break, troll! she's only 13!

    Person A: Dude Heechul is so gay..
    Person B: I sense a troll here

    It's like, dude, f*cking go look it up on the internet; not everyone on the internet are "trolls".

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  9. Everyone on the internets is a troll, troll.

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  10. OMFG!!! Forever laughing my ass off at this k-pop dictionary!!! I've been waiting for someone in this blog to put up something like this (even suggested it a few times).

    Suckmydee, you need to do MOAR!!!!

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  11. This should be included in urbandictionary, every single one is on point.

    Even the cringeworthy dubulge. Who the hell comes up with this shit?

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  12. ^everyone on your interwebs are trolling you, you just don't know

    but yeah, the most of the people on the internet are trolls, but fangirls use the word in the wrong context. so it's kind of a hit-miss thing

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  13. nicki minaj is faker than iraq war vets limbs

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  14. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tLPZmPaHme0

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  15. Pretty much.

    This is beautiful work.

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  16. "Maknae - Youngins that aren't legal yet but we'd like to bang the shit out of them regardless, who the fuck cares about jail?"

    kekekekekekekekek u mad?

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  17. this article is fucking perfect

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  18. "DAEBAK!!! (Insert some spiel about how great oppa/unni is in broken English.) Kekekekekekeke"

    I get second-hand embarrassment just by looking at those comments.

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  19. Nooo I love suckmydee's article. Please, be -at least- a guest writer too !

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  20. Suckmydee, why is this your last article when you're sooo much better than Ahjussi?

    There wasn't some kind of power play involved in that decision, was it? O_o If there was, then.... FUUUUUCK!

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  21. I was waiting for something this. Love it. Laughed ass off. Words cannot describe how awesome this is.

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  22. Japan has a 18 + disclose a great deal. That's why it can penetrate into the Japanese easily.

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  23. I love bagel girls, I don't know what it means but all the pics of bagel girls exude this unknown quality that I love.

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  24. Ahjusshi - Old perverted man that fanboys over SNSD & Kara ofc!

    Fix'd. This article is daebak. Suckmydee Hwaiting!

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  25. not really based on fangirls but why does everyone use the word bias like it's an object or person?
    "[insert faggot oppa here] is my ultimate bias!@!@!@"

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  26. There are way to say things, if you say "hey he's uberly gay" will jump on you,but if you say "he's a bit feminine isn't he?" they won't.

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  27. hasta la vista baby!

    these korean words are dope, no doubt

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  28. JPOP is awesome :D
    And holy shit, I just saw your new header for the website.... ...... ................... D:

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  29. "Honey thighs" exist just cause Korean girls got no ass. They got to make up something to be happy about.

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  30. LOOOOOOOOL OMG perfect.

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  31. Please Suckmydee, I want to you to stay as an author !!! >.< Ahjusshi should get fired and YOU should stay and keep writing articles which are actually funny and witty ♥

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  32. @745

    If I remember right, dee is still part of the site for something else so I'm sure we'll see the occasional article every now and then. In fact it's better this way. It'll make the post that much sweeter whenever it comes considering how elusive it'll be.

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  33. She told me when I first got her to join that she was going to leave in September. She just wants to design the blog, and if she wishes, write an article here or there (like Lickmypunani and ADKF do.)

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  34. But ... What are actually Honey thighs?

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  35. ^ smooth thighs you just wanna lick opposite of Hyuna

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  36. FUCKING HELL.

    I can't find that 'ottoke' gif.

    Grrr.

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  37. LOL
    Onew's penis actually has a name and its famous enough for you to put it here. Hell yeah.

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  38. i think this is my favourite post so far LMFAO. props to whoever wrote this . ;)

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  39. I thought you would have mentioned pairings

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  40. Love you Dee. So fucking much

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  41. Were the terms selca, netizen and mutizen COINED by these fangirls too?

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  42. Deelicious I bow before your holiness.
    This article was simply deabak!
    I think you might be younger than so dongsaeng you did well.I aint mad that you took a swipe at everything im still guilty of doing,kekekekeke. I love you no, SARANGAEYO :)

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  43. I fucking love you.

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  44. Can you define "fake fans" too? I would love a (trolled) definition of it, haha :)

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  45. @ 10:26

    Those three words I think were already used in Korea before the fangirl onslaught.

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  46. omg bravo *stands to applause*

    this your best post in over a while pure LOLtastic!!!!

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  47. HAHAHAH best post in a while! this was hilarious

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  48. Is Koreaboo synonymous to Weeaboo?

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  49. This is so so true. I can't STAND IT EITHER. One more word about your 'oppa' and I am going to kill you. One more stream of kekekekeke.. just.. either learn fucking Korean, or don't. Ffs don't mash the odd word in because you make some of us less ridiculous fans crazy. I srsly can't fucking stand this shit. I will cut you fangirls, I will.

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  50. I think that I was the only one who see that!! (Cellulitis - Hyuna) :S

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