Sunday, September 30, 2012

"I Don't Want Kpop To Become Mainstream"

Source.

At first i wanted kpop to spread and become well known but now i kind of don’t want it to. The thing is, i found kpop because i was looking for something that wasn’t mainstream like katy perry or justin bieber. I wanted something that was different. Kpop for me is like my own little world that nobody really knows about. I guess you could say it was like narnia, something special that only a few knew about. But now that its becoming popular i feel like thats been taken away. Don’t get me wrong i’ll always love kpop and i want my artists to get more recognition and gain new fans but i just want to have something thats unique and my own.

s!b: People will think i’m making a big deal out of nothing. And I come across as being selfish for not wanting to share kpop with the world.


"I avoid mainstream music in the United States to listen to mainstream music in Korea. I R SO HIPSTER!"

I've seen a lot of comments like this, especially since Gangnam Style has become a meme worldwide hit. What a lot of people don't realize is that they became Kpop fans because of a hit song. It may not have been worldwide like Psy, but it was definitely a hit in Korea and among Asia. A lot of people got into Kpop around the time when Wonder Girls and SNSD came out with their huge hits. Just because new people get into Kpop through Gangnam Style, it doesn't make someone cooler/more hip just because they got in because of Gee. Stop acting like you were a Kpop fan when H.O.T. was promoting. You're not Sung Shi Won.

[MV Review] Naul - Memory of the Wind



Naul's Memory of the Wind is the most popular song in Korea within the past week, but how does the MV fare?

Saturday, September 29, 2012

[MV Review] Andamiro - Hypnotize


Imagine a fangirl masquerading as a maid and then hypnotizing her oppa. Yeah, that's the basic premise for this MV.

Friday, September 28, 2012

Leessang Unplugged Review



Leessang made a quick comeback after releasing their seventh album less than a year before Unplugged. While Unplugged isn't as good as Asura Balbalta, it's still a very good album on its own merits.

Thursday, September 27, 2012

The Man Does Not Want You to Fap to Jailbait

Let's be real folks.

KPop is one of the finest collections of publicly-available and socially-acceptable-to-admire jailbaits on the internet. Legends such as Suzy, Krystal, IU, Dani (lol) and Tia all put their carefully sculpted bodies (okay, maybe not fat IU or fat Suzy) on display for the oppas. You watched their fancams together, You downloaded their hi-res pics together, and though you may ashamed to admit it, you fapped to them together. All was good in the world.

Until today.


RUDE-dols

Infinite are RUDE-dols!!!!!!!111111111111

I knew it. INFINITE is rude behind the scenes and only show their angelic acts towards the fans. Their kind acts are too good to be true. (e.g. picking up trashes after an event and so on.) Maybe the popularity got into their heads already… I don’t want to believe the rumours that were spreading before the Taiwan incident cause I want to give them the benefit of the doubt but it turns out that they’re really rude and unapproachable.

s!B: I almost got into this group but I had a feeling that they’re not really worth it.


OH FUCKING NO! OPPARS ACT FAKE ON TV SO I CAN'T LIKE THEM! THESE FUCKERS ARE THE ONLY ONES THAT ACT RUDE WHEN THEY'RE NOT ON TV! I BET THEY CUM ON GIRLS' STOMACHS AND DON'T HELP THEM CLEAN UP! FUCK THESE FUCKING RUDE FUCKERS! PICKING UP TRASH IS SO FAKE! I WAS HOPING THEY WEREN'T LIKE ME AND THREW WRAPPERS, BOTTLES, CANS, ETC. OUT THE WINDOW WHILE DRIVING!

I ALSO BELIEVE THAT ALL RUMORS ARE FACTS! THEY SHOULD HONOR TAIWAN SINCE JOLIN TSAI RESIDES HERE! GUYS WOULD LINE UP JUST TO SNIFF HER BUTTHOLE! THESE INFINITE FUCKERS ARE PROBABLY TOO RUDE TO SNIFF JOLIN TSAI'S BUTTHOLE!

HOYA WAS SO RUDE IN ANSWER ME 1997. HOW RUDE OF HIM TRYING TO BE A SYMPATHETIC CHARACTER WHILE BEING GAY! HE WANTED TO SNIFF SEO IN GUK'S BUTTHOLE BUT NOT JUNG EUNJI'S BUTTHOLE! THAT'S BEING REALLY RUDE TO EUNJI!

Wednesday, September 26, 2012

Stupid Things Fangirls Utter 15

This week's comment was submitted by damacode:

IS EXO TAKING OVER ME?

For school, instead of dressing normally like other people, everyday I wear my buffalo rent out costume I got for the month. At first people thought I was just fooling around, but when I started wearing it everyday and people found out I was serious about wearing it, they started picking on me, I mean, I don’t think there’s anything wrong with it, you should be allowed to wear what you want to wear.
Also, on the last day of school I crept into the school’s main reception, found the password to the computer in a file, and changed my name to ‘Krease’. They even called ‘Krease’ out in the assembly for the athletics team awards. They still didn’t even notice a thing was wrong when I strolled up in my buffalo costume to receive my 1st place 100m sprint award.
What’s really annoying me is there are rumours about me going around that I’m just a delusional Exotic who needs to go to a mental hospital, but the thing is, I’m not even an Exotic. I don’t even know why they would think that, I think they’re just discriminating against me because I happen to have a pet seagull and I sing EXO’s ‘What Is Love’ to it everyday. 


s!b I don’t want people sending me hate mail on my blog saying I’m delusional.
s!b I always thought of myself as a pure, hardcore ELF, and the thought of being an Exotic upsets me.

P.S. I do wash the buffalo costume.
(From: www.kpopsecrets.tumblr.com/post/29546134860/is-exo-taking-over-me)

Tuesday, September 25, 2012

Today's News In Five Minutes #2

You guys wanted it, I felt like doing it again, so another installment of old school AKF articles wrapped up into one article.

Sunday, September 23, 2012

Boram's legs are worse than Sooyoung's legs



It's like she's having a competition with Sooyoung to see who can be the first human chopsticks.

Saturday, September 22, 2012

Pink Pandas Hating on Eunji's Fans


Apparently it's a sin to like A Pink's Eunji these days. I figured Pink Pandas would be happy by all of the attention that Eunji is getting, but there's some fans who hate it.

Idol rap

So the other day, I stumbled upon a post by  presumably  a fangirl. Well...in truth, i don't know and that's not the problem. However, seeing those people trying to reason it out, is just painful and hopeless. I wasn't sure what he/she was thinking, but it really amuses me. 

Friday, September 21, 2012

Question of the Week 61

So I kind of maybe missed last week and am late this week.

Don't judge me.

This week's question is:
If you could make a calendar featuring your 12 favourite idols, who would they be and what would the calendar's theme be?

RE: They say Sandara can't sing?

A funny topic from allkpop's forums.

I don't do many RE: articles, but I couldn't pass this one up. So much delusion in that thread that I possibly can't cover it all, so you'll have to read the whole thread yourself for maximum laughter.

Thursday, September 20, 2012

Thoughts on Shipping: My Mind is Full of Fuck

Just when you thought SONEs could not get any more batshit insane, they always manage to top themselves and set new standards of insanity.

BIOLOGY 101: Approximately 70 percent of all conjoined twins are girls. In the rare case of Lee Sunny and Kim Hyoyeon, they were born from two separate wombs but their bodies can be joined ex utero to consume less energy.
What.

Checkmate, biology.

Checkmate, sanity.

EDIT: Checkmate, me.

GDragon is Delusional

Apparently AKF's favorite faggot rapper is a bit jelly over the success of PSY's Gangum Style---this according to legit news sources such as Soompi (LOL). Time for GDRAGON to understand, comprehend, and to become enlightened to why he will never be successful in the UNITED STATES.

G Dragon trolls me twice in one week

Yeah, I avoid Big Bang like the plague and GD still managed to troll me twice in one week. Man, fuck GD.

Fangirl sees the light



Saw this message this morning when I logged in at Hallyu8.

Why Can't Suzy Hold All These Feels?

As you all know, Suzy has built a long illustrious career of fat whoring all over KPop. She loves it, we love it, but her fangirls don't. Every time we bring it up, there's always some naive stan accusing us of being antis. 

EVERYONE RAGED WHEN WE FIRST TOLD YOU GUYS THAT SUZY WAS A FAT WHORE, BUT NOW WE HAVE MORE PROOF.

MTE, TOP.

Tuesday, September 18, 2012

Sunday, September 16, 2012

4 Secret Minutes of Drama

The thing about music is that everything builds on something else. It takes influences from things we've done, things we've seen, things only we have experienced in our own unique way and smushes it all together to make a brand new sound. It's only a natural process of creativity, especially in the pop market.

So when 4nias try to start shit with SECRET over their Poison comeback, all I can do is laugh.

I hate using Tumblr gifs...

Friday, September 14, 2012

[MV Review] SECRET - Poison

This summary is not available. Please click here to view the post.

[MV Review] BoA - The Shadow

BoA's follow up to Only One is The Shadow. Shadow of what you ask? Shadow of her former popularity, shadow of her hoobaes SNSD, or even shadow of young upstarts throwin dat shade perhaps. I've become horrid at these teaser sentences, so I should probably stop here or start stealing shit from Allkpop.


Thursday, September 13, 2012

South Korean Special Troopers

After the death of their beloved Kim Jong ILL (Also their best emcee), the North Korean has been trying to avenge for their leader.

Now, most of you guys know he had a heart attack, but we were able to discover the cause of the incident.
His death came a few days after the release of  Snow Pink. Rumor has it, Na Eun has been a nationally celebrated hero/hitgirl/slut....since that day.

While on its way to the a secret national building, a report from Cube's headquarter describing the situation was intercepted by our intelligence. The letter clearly described how emcee Ill died on that day. While on his train to some event/meeting/god knows where, Kim Jong ill was extremely bored. He then checked out youtube for news and fapping materials. Luckily,  he stumbled upon A Pink's comeback video- the My My MV. It was a good video, and many comrades recommended it for some good fapping materials.


Well...poor old man fapped and couldn't take his gaze off those cute eyes below ( WARNING: DON'T STARE AT THOSE EYEZ IF YOUR HEART IZ WEEK, OR UR NOT PREPARED ENOUF). Ya'll know what would happen. When old age + bad health + gang life + party all dayz+ fugly wife = heart attack




Being in A Pink is just a side job....but seriously...who can resists this cute little thing :3?

WHAT IN THE ACTUAL FUCK IS GOING ON...

OH SHIT SUNWHA! NO YOU DIDN'T GURL. Did you just SLAP your clit!?

MFW WHEN PRACTICALLY FINGERING HERSELF
IN OTHER NEWS....

Seungri (S)Exposed?!

Seungri's always been the womanizer of Big Bang (even if he wasn't in a group full of prudes like Taeyang or Daesung), but this time his libido's gotten him into a fair bit of trouble. Allegedly.

GLOBAL SUPERSTARS GET FRONT PAGE NEWS

Wednesday, September 12, 2012

Koreaboo pls.



Koreaboos just stick to fb.

Orange Caramel--Lipstick MV (REVIEW)

-->

Hi. So.


Did anyone see the Orange Caramel video for Lipstick?



So. Like. I did a review for it.

So. Like. If you want. You can click read to read it. But like. If you don’t. then. You don’t really have to. Not like you will die or anything if you never read it.

So click on this shit for more…if not. I will rape your  shit squirter.  Oh that reminds me….Dani is going to be in T-ara soon (but we all hope not). Any of you perverts into lifting  young giraffe legs above your head????? Unf unf unf. Seriously I know you think this giraffe shit  is getting old now…but her legs do look like they belong along side flamingos, giraffes,  or whatever the fuck this animal is. A cow?  

dani.jpeg


So let’s get to the Orange Caramel  Lipdick MV. 

Stupid Things Fangirls Utter 13

This week's STFU was submitted by Ja, who writes:

"I went to a K-pop meetup in my city a couple of days ago, and there was a 13-year old girl there. She kept looking at me with a suspiciously until I finally asked what the problem was, she answered: "I don't trust guys who aren't Chinese, Japanese, or Korean".
 

Poor child."

Tuesday, September 11, 2012

[MV Review] Fiestar - Vista


Okay, I only know about Fiestar because some people on Hallyu8 were talking about how they'd be so great and shit even though they had yet to debut. Seeing as Fiestar is like the 30th different girl group that has debuted this summer, I just wrote them off as yet another girl group. It turns out that Fiestar is from LOEN, so they couldn't be terrible, right?

Sunday, September 9, 2012

THE TRUTH ABOUT HWAYOUNG GATE

I HAVE FIGURED EVERYTHING OUT, I HAVE THE TRUTH

HWAYOUNG, T-ARA, KIM KWANG SOO, CCM I KNOW IT ALL

I AM CURRENTLY ON THE RUN FROM THE AUTHORITIES, THEY ARE ALL ON KKS'S BANKROLL

EVERY SECOND I DELAY THE PUBLISHING OF THIS ACCOUNT, THE MORE LIKELY IT IS I WILL BE TRACED.

IF I AM TRACED, I WILL BE FOUND
IF I AM FOUND, I WILL BE APPREHENDED
IF I AM APPREHENDED, THE TRUTH DIES WITH ME

TRUST NO ONE (EXCEPT ME, LOL)

Lime Time


I figured I'm entitled to at least one "This is news in itself" article.

GD's insecurity shown with another cheap publicity stunt

As you all well know, there was a lot of buzz generated by news of his 19+ MUSIC VIDEO WITH HOT UNDERAGE GIRL! ...but then it turned out to be just a song wherein he is pissed because he's stuck in the friendzone and decided to call her boyfriend a dirty word.

Hearing the nationwide yawn upon this reveal, he decided to try and prove he can be TRULY CONTROVERSIAL AND EDGY with his new album. Pics after the jump.

[MV Review] BoA - Only One


I have the same problems writing this as I did with the Younha review. Just like the Younha review, I was just gonna write "Awesome" and call it a day. I was just happy that BoA came back with Only One, because it felt like it was her apology for Hurricane Venus. I also just wanted to finish the review before Zaku wrote his review for The Shadow.

Saturday, September 8, 2012

[AKF Subs] GayU is Gay

After a long hiatus, AKF Subs returns to bring you quality and accurate subs for your favorite idols! This edition features our very own Nation's Little Sister, IU!

IU recently shot a CF for "The Saem" (??), and some interviewers caught up to her on set to interview her since turning 20 years old. Shockingly, this young new adult has come out of the closet and come clean about her gayness! Full subs after the jump~!!



((Relevant clip starts at 2:54))

[MV Review] Kim Jin Pyo - I'm Sorry, I'm Sorry


Kim Jin Pyo is back with his sixth album....if you hadn't noticed the "JP6" liberally placed throughout the MV. I didn't know who Kim Jin Pyo was before I heard this song, so I went and wiki'd him and found out he was part of Panic with Lee Juck back in the 90s. Yeah, way before everyone's time. I'm just assuming that you guys have heard of Lee Juck by now...you know, he was in that song with Yoo Jae Suk a couple of months ago. Anyway, the review after the jump.

Question of the Week 60

Holy balls! So sorry. This should have been posted yesterday. My bad.

Do kids still say that anymore? No?

Anyways. Uh. This week's question is:
What food would you most want to eat "produced/sold" by an idol? For example, Sangchu's chicken breasts.

Eunjung bullies Nara, steals her wig



Friday, September 7, 2012

Hwayoung releases a (really bad) rap verse



Once again, bandwagon fans are eating Hwayoung's rap up as if she was a rap messiah. First it was "I likey likey dis, likey likey dat" that made Hwayoung a laughingstock, and now she's trying to pull a Jay Park and make it seem like they're talented, but hope enough fans are too stupid to realize that they're nothing special when it comes to rapping.

Wednesday, September 5, 2012

Nothing to do with Kpop---Everything to do with AKF

I'm sorry to state that it's time to expose each and every author of AKF. I'm sick as fuck working for them, not getting paid, not getting any fucking respect from any of them. They treat me like an outcast, and a subpar member of the group--seriously if I left they wouldn't give a fucking two shits. So I'm finally going to expose these JABRONIS for the JABRONIS they are. Names will be stated and pictures as well.

Press "read more" to here all the juicy details, homos!:

KAHI BECAUSE I FUCKING SAID SO...DELETE THIS SHIT AND I'LL KICK SOME ASS! Damn this bitch is sexy as fuck!


                                        YOU'RE A FAGGOT FOR 

       HIGHLIGHTING THIS!!!!

A
                       (hidden message above for fun, please highlight it ^.^) 

The Reveal: These images and names are FACTUAL...if anyone says differently they are bullshitting and probably into shit like Cold Play...

Stupid Things Fangirls Utter 12

This week's comment was found by Yaminah:


Tuesday, September 4, 2012

JB Psy's



Be proud Canadians Psy was just signed by none other than Justin Biebers manager! 

Looks like the sexy man from YG was able to become a "global star" before 2NE1. I wonder if Bjs are crying themselves to sleep or not? They had such high hopes for world domination. 

On a side note, I feel like everyone who listens to kpop has a deep hate for JB which to me is funny, all the negative comments about associating him with kpop are quite hilarious. 

Comments: 

Im so proud of PSY like SERIOUSLY!! but on another note...
*flips tables* Justin Bieber.... Psy in the same sentence....
I told my mom and he just said that they were just using him because he suddenly got really big....

why dont they mention the record labels name and stop saying Justin biebers label?

YOU WERE THE CHOSEN ONE! YOU WERE SUPPOSED TO DESTROY THE BIEBER NOT JOIN HIM!

KKS flaunts his pedophilia in preparation for Dani's debut


Now we know why he kicked out Hwayoung, and really, we should have known all along. The nipple slip incident made him very uncomfortable from then on. He could no longer see her without having traumatic flashbacks of her fully developed breasts bouncing around, so he waited for the next group conflict to come up and gave her the boot.

But now we are faced with a new problem. He wanted Dani to debut at this time to make T-ara the ultimate pedosexy group in kpop, but she didn't want to be a burden and requested to debut later. What was he going to do? He already had the title track picked out! She was his hot trend sexy icon!

So it came to him in a stroke of genius, or perhaps you could say he came to it after many strokes: A child version of T-ara! It may be true that Boram hasn't aged since she was 10, but the other members have become far too mature! You can't show all those S-lines and call it sexy, so put children next to them, and from then on their grown up form can remind him of the real deal! The irresistible logic of facts! No more repeating the Hwayoung incident!

So now if you buy T-ara's Sexy Love you will own an album with dolled-up children on the cover. This is to remind you of the new Dani-focus that T-ara will have in the near future. Don't give up hope, pedophiles of the world, your leader Kim Kwang Soo is looking out for you! In fact, it's better than you ever dreamed!

Hey little sexy girl! You are so sexy!

This "little T-ara" will be performing with them for their comeback stage on September 6th! You don't just have to imagine what it's like based on the cover, you'll be able to see their pedosexy dancing on live television! The children may also function as a protection from the rage of antifans so they aren't pelted with various produce and eggs and booed off the stage. Genius!

Monday, September 3, 2012

Top Korean Girls 2012

So today, while google an actress that Chucko oppar told me, I stumbled upon an article about Top Beauties in Korea 2012...
The site itself is dedicated for beauty....yet we have Boram, Dara, Hyunah, Qri, and the infamous duckling - Park Bom on top of everyone else.

Most Beautiful Korean Girls 2012


Top K-Pop Girls 2012

Are you a fans of K-Pop Girls? Do you want to check out who are the most beautiful K-Pop Girls? In this page, you will be able to look at the top 10 most beautiful k-pop girls like Jessica Jung, Jeon Boram, Sandara Park, Park Bom, Song Hye Kyo, Han Hyo Joo and many more!
(hidden message above for fun, please highlight it ^.^) 

Sunday, September 2, 2012

[MV Review] T-ara - Sexy Love Dance Version

This summary is not available. Please click here to view the post.

Gangnam Style Sucks



I'm loling at his unibrow. The comments he reads are hilarious and just shows how people take pop music too seriously. Anyway, enjoy this while I write my T-ara review.

SLW, is my music taste good enough for you?

In Korean music, I like Leessang, Dynamic Duo, Epik High, Fana, Eluphant, Outsider, Garion, Baechigi, Baek Ji Young, Lena Park, BoA, Taru, Shinhwa, Kara, 6-ara, Dal Shabet, Hello Venus, miss A, Secret, Rainbow, DBSK.

I have to ask you since we're all too retarded. I don't know if I like good music or not. Please enlighten us.

Saturday, September 1, 2012

Gangnam Style Breaks 85 Million Views, Buttmad Ensues

Proving that PSY's Gangnam Style wasn't just a passing fancy, his official MV has just recently broken the 83 million views record held by SNSD's Gee as the most watched KPop video on Youtubes.

And SONEs are not pleased.

Even Seobot had to boot up rage.exe for this one.
This shit writes itself, so I'll let my screencaps do most of the talking. LOL

All Hail Queen Gyuri

So I saw this article and yeah. Gyuri is the boss.