End of an Era

Well friends, it's time to hang it up. Over the past few months, I have lost all interest in writing for AKF. I think it's better to end AKF now rather than drag out this sparse posting for another couple of years.

I am getting much busier with my personal life because of work and needing to study for my professional exams to get my license, and I may end up even doing a masters degree later on. Aside from that, I have been actively tackling my depression and enjoying doing things that don't revolve around me sitting on a computer shit posting and trolling all day. Lastly, I'd rather spend time with the girlfriend than to deal with stupid fangirls online.

I have also come to the point in my Kpop fan life where I would just rather enjoy things than to have to be expected by tens of thousands of readers to react to everything that happens on a daily basis. I expect to be in the Kpop fandom for the long haul as I really like a lot of the new groups. I just don't care to write about it any longer.

You'll still be able to read new articles from Kpopalypse and suho_ftw on their own sites and on Asian Junkie, as I got IATFB to add suho_ftw to the site. I'll be retiring from writing for good.

I want to thank all of the authors who were a part of AKF42 and all the readers and commenters who came here over the past five and a half years.

Maybe someone will make a site that has the same spirit of AKF in the future or maybe not, but I enjoyed growing AKF to what it was and I hope you all enjoyed the ride.

So you want to be a k-pop songwriter - Kpopalypse's 7 steps to certain success*

I've written before about people wanting to become k-pop idols, and how realistic (or not) that is... but what about people who aim to be songwriters?  Is k-pop songwriting a realistic goal?  Can it make money?  How to best approach pitching your songs to the k-pop market?  Never fear as Kpopalypse has all the trufax!

Jessica - Wonderland

Jessica made a surprising comeback seemingly out of nowhere. The neckbeards on NB are probably thinking "lolol, Sica's business is doing poorly, so she needs another music comeback" while ignoring the fact that plenty of other musicians around the world run fashion labels and still produce music. But hey, don't let me stop these same people who bash Jessica from fingering their assholes to G-Dragon as he comes out with his weird fashion crap.

Guess the Kpopalypse 2016 end-of-year lists!

For those of you who give a flying fuck, click the Raina to do the Kpopalypse "guess the end-of-year lists" survey!

Note that this is only a survey about the Kpopalypse end-of-year lists, not AKF as a whole.  Have fun!

Round-Up Reviews: Ladies' Code, BAP, SHINee, Up10tion, Hyoyeon

Finals week start tomorrow and I don't have time to give each their own individual reviews since I'm preparing for finals. So I'm just going to wind up some thoughts on the releases in one post.

Nayeon's Vibrator's Top 10 Songs of 2016 - #10 - Twice's Cheer Up

I'm going to do the top 10 list a little different this year. Instead of doing one post that lists all of my top songs in them, I figured I would try highlighting each song. It's December, usually the time of year when no one really tries in K-pop except to grab a few quick wons from Christmas ballads, so I'm starting the countdown a little early this year.

Results of Kpopalypse's predictions for 2016 and new ultra-trufaxual predictions for k-pop in 2017

Last year I made a post predicting events in k-pop over the course of 2016.  It’s time for Kpopalypse to revisit this post to see how right/wrong I was, and also to predict what’s going to happen in k-pop in 2017!

Hyoyeon - Mystery Teaser

I need to go back to my Twice-centric Kpop universe because this is the last thing I ever wanted to happen in Kpop.

2NE1 Disbands

To be honest, I already mourned for 2NE1 back in 2014, so I'm relatively numb to this. While 2NE1 haven't been on their A-game in years, they still put out some of the best music in K-pop between 2009-2012, which will always be looked upon fondly.

Well at least we have CL surely making her 5th, 6th, 7th, and 8th American debut *shutters*, Dara doing advertisements, Minzy doing a solo sometimes in the future and Bom(?) who got the shortest end of the stick in this situation.

Snuper - "Platonic Love", "You=Heaven", and "It's Raining"

This isn't a review. It's more like a recommendation.
Snuper's pretty awesome.

The MMAs: They're Not That Serious

Not even I could escape the shit storm that's been the 2016 MMAs. And I hold the same views about awards shows as AKF and Kpopalypse.

Rose is hot

Rose from Black Pink is hot.

Radwimps - Hikari

Hey everyone! Watch a tease of a MV from my favorite Japanese rock band.

Yeah, meant to review T-ara's Tiamo MV but then got sucked up into Pokemon Sun and then I'm seeing the girlfriend tomorrow...so maybe that review will go up on Monday.

Trumpopalypse Now - what does a Trump victory mean for k-pop?

So Donald Trump won the US elections, and predictably everyone is freaking out.  However, as usual nobody's asking the really big question, the kind of question that in this day and age you can only see answered properly by Kpopalypse - what does a Trump victory really mean for k-pop?  Read on to find out!

Where's The Originality? Up Your Ass.

I thought I would do another editorial/thoughts post in between all of these music video reviews to balance everything out. Youngjae is hinting at the next mv review for those who want to skip this.

I want to be Sana's Hand

SANAAAAA!!!!!! pic.twitter.com/0OLlr4xYOL

— ᕙ(•̀‸•́‶)ᕗ #TT8thWIN (@pengjeongnam) November 10, 2016

Sana needs to shove me inside of Nayeon.

Anyway, I'm out for the week. I'll be in Chicago for training for a week, so see you guys on Saturday.

Sana is So Hot

Fap fap fap.

Twice Covers "So Hot"

Bless Twice.

Momoland - Jjan Koong Kwang

New girl group Momoland has debuted, and just for Nancy alone, I will be following this group.

Make Kpop Cute Again

7mb https://t.co/mukZGOHyTX
4mb https://t.co/M41fX58H30
4메가 짜리가 좀 더 느려요 pic.twitter.com/Vd15et21Id

— 천하무~적 예봄💕 (@lvlz_ahchoo) November 9, 2016

Seo Jisoo, famous lesbian of Lovelyz, is adorably cute.

Kpopalypse Nugu Alert Episode 23: Yes Man, Seo Hyun Lee, Ryu Man Hyun

Now that the novelty of having web traffic after posting about tits the other day has worn off, it's time to scare off all of my readers again with another round of the statistically least popular Kpopalypse series ever, Kpopalypse Nugu Alert!  Let's check out some more nugus!

[MV Review] BLACKPINK - "Playing With Fire"

The second song to be released from their new set, and their best song overall. One of the best of the year to be honest.

[MV Review] BLACKPINK - "Stay"

Blackpink has released two new songs that are actually good. Naturally I'm going to review the lesser of the two since bad news should always come before good news.

Momo's momos

Me. 

Pump up the pearly volume - big boobs in k-pop guide part 4

This summary is not available. Please click here to view the post.

RIP in peace, Rainbow

It's a sad day that everyone saw coming. DSP promoted Rainbow so horribly that a group this good failed to ever win a music show. At one point, Rainbow was one of my favorite groups during 2011-2012 when they were releasing good song after good song. They were starting to gain popularity during this time, but DSP sent them off to Japan and really stopped promoting them in Korea after that. We still got "Black Swan," but Korean shitlords hated that song and Rainbow only promoted for about two weeks.

RIP in peace, but we'll still always have Hyunyoung fancams to remember you by, Rainbow.

Writer's Block

Hey everyone, I just wanted to let you all know I've been experiencing major writer's block for the past month and haven't been able to think of any ideas for any long articles and have trouble even writing medium-length articles, for example, MV reviews.

[MV Review] Twice - "TT"

Twice continues on their roll of success with "TT", which is their best effort yet.

Twice TT

Cancel all of your plans so that you can replay TT all day!

Five Nights At Ailee’s K-pop Vocal Fan Camp 2

It's nearly Halloween, so that means scary Kpopalypse fanfiction fun times!  Read on for the long-awaited sequel to Five Nights At Ailee's K-pop Vocal Fan Camp!

It's not mandatory to read the original to enjoy this sequel, but it probably will help your appreciation of some of the finer points of the story.  If you haven't read it you can do so here, otherwise read on!

[MV Review] BTS (Bangtan Boys) - "Blood, Sweat, and Tears"

BTS make their, what? 17th comeback of the year? I honestly lost count, they comeback 20 times a year anyway. 

Nayeon can now die in peace

Nayeon finally got her wish!

I don't blame Nayeon one bit, as kisses from cute girls are the best.

Twice Titty/TT MV Teaser 2

If this teaser doesn't get you to stan Nayeon, I feel bad for you.

Anyway, HYPED as fuck!

BoA's Top 15 Korean Songs - #9 - Hope

BoA's "Hope" is a song that lives up to its name.

The cute titties belong to...

AOA!

BoA's Top 15 Japanese Songs - #9 - Shout It Out

Why wasn't this song more popular?!

BoA's Top 15 Korean Songs - #10 - My Name

Not going to lie, after watching the music video, it's easy to see why I like this song.

BoA's Top 15 Japanese Songs - #10 - Eien

Sometimes it feels like yesterday that "Eien" came out but the song is already seven years old.

Nayeon's Teaser for Twice's Comeback

Nayeon does nothing for a whole minute yet I'm still fucking hyped for the comeback!

BoA's Top 15 Korean Songs - #11 - Hurricane Venus

BoA had finally returned to Korea and came out with a great title track in "Hurricane Venus". Admittedly, I only liked the song at first. I think many factors contributed to why the song/concept didn't click with me at first, but over time, the song has steadily climbed up my list of favorite songs from BoA.

Youkyung leaves FNC

Youkyung, aka the drummer from AOA Black, was just offed like a black dude in a horror film.

NOW HOW ARE PEOPLE GOING TO COMPLAIN BY SAYING THAT AOA SHOULD HAVE  A COMEBACK WITH THEIR BAND CONCEPT WHEN THE DRUMMER LEFT? I FEEL BAD FOR THESE PEOPLE WHO PRETEND TO LIKE AOA BLACK!

MAKE AOA GREAT AGAIN! BRING BACK YOUKYUNG FOR ALL FIVE OF HER FANS!

BoA's Top 15 Japanese Songs - #11 - Quincy

Another classic from BoA from when she was at her peak in Japan.

BoA's Top 15 Korean Songs - #12 - The Shadow

If "Moto" was showcasing BoA's abs, "The Shadow" is all about BoA's cleavage, and if that isn't enough reason to watch one of BoA's MVs, well, it sucks to be you.

[MV Review] SHINee - "1of1"

After over a year of waiting SHINee follow up the awesome "View" with the decent "1of1."

BoA's Top 15 Japanese Songs - #12 - Aggressive

I would let BoA get aggressive with me. ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

BoA's Top 15 Korean Songs - #13 - Dangerous

For those of you who like "Adrenaline" but wanted it to be even more electronic, "Dangerous" is the song for you.

BoA's Top 15 Japanese Songs - #13 - Tail of Hope

"Tail of Hope" is one of those songs I go to when I need to improve my mood. For example, when I fear for the future of humanity after reading fangirls' comments and know that they'll eventually breed and have their own kids, I feel bleak about the future. Then comes a song like "Tail of Hope" to remind me that I'll be really old or dead by the time the offspring of stupid fangirls will be old enough to vote and shit, so I end up feeling better.

[MV Review] Infinite - "The Eye"

Infinite is back and as consistent as ever!

BoA's Top 15 Korean Songs - #14 - Adrenaline

BoA has finally returned to Korea after five years of exclusively promoting, and she chose a great time to make a comeback in Korea. K-pop was taking off at the same time J-pop was sliding.

Twice to Make a Comeback this Month

Kpop's new national girl group, Twice, will be making a comeback. This should be perfect timing. As soon as I'm done with my crazy hours working out of town, Twice will be back for me to spam on AKF.

(Update on the job status: I have an interview for a corporate position in about two weeks that would give me a regular 40-50 hour per week job without travel. Pray for AKF oppar. The first interview already went well. Then if I get the job, I can post regularly again.)

BoA's Top 15 Japanese Songs - #14 - Bad Drive

This is a song that makes the cut purely based off of the live performances of the song.

Han Ye Seul for Chanel

#샤넬 #CHANEL #샤넬립잉크 #ROUGEALLUREINK #루쥬알뤼르잉크

A video posted by Han Ye Seul _ 한예슬 (@leslie_allwehaveisus) on Oct 5, 2016 at 3:18pm PDT

Only one more week of being extremely busy! Enjoy this Chanel video starring Ye Seul!

BoA's Top 15 Korean Songs - #15 - Moto

Songs such as "Moto" make me feel old. "Moto" is 11 years old.

m-flo - Synergy

My favorite band is finally back. I thought I was going to have to wait another five years for a song from them, but it was only 2.5 years!

BoA's Top 15 Japanese Songs - #15 - Winter Love

In celebration of BoA's 15th anniversary in Japan (and her 15th anniversary in Korea that I wasn't around to celebrate), and to have some articles up while I'm away on business, I'm counting down on my top 15 songs of BoA from Japan and Korea.

Kpopalypse Nugu Alert Episode 22: Post Panic, Stellarjet, Club505

Welcome to another episode of Kpopalypse Nugu Alert!  Let's once again check out some more nugus!

Dal Shabet - FRI.SAT.SUN

Dal Shabet comes back with another jam that will be ignored by Korea.

A Pink - Only One

A Pink made a comeback and all is right with Kpop again.

Dia's Yebin

Just posting cute videos of Yebin because most of you are probably thinking "who the hell is Yebin?" after seeing my new top 10 list.

Kim Hyun Joong celebration post

Hi caonimas!  As many of you may know, SS501 singer Kim Hyun Joong was recently found innocent of all those nasty domestic violence charges!  Courts can never be wrong, so this means that Kim Hyun Joong must be the great person that Kpopalypse always knew he was!  It's time for a celebration post!

AKF's Top 10 Idols Who Could Use Me As Their Vibrator

Recycling this picture again because it's still funny almost three years later.

I've had a few people on Twitter ask me what my bias list since I always like a bunch of new idols. I guess my top 10 of the new generation wasn't enough, and the old list is almost three years old with a lot of the idols on that list out of the game or just about to leave the game.

Here is the January 2014 list. I can tell you that Victoria isn't on the list because she's basically a Chinese actress at this point and is only fulfilling out her legal contract with SM until it expires. Jessica and Nicole are basically out of the game at this point (Jessica doesn't do much with music and what has Nicole done?), and Jooyeon is completely out of the game. So this list will look a lot different. Soyeon is not on the list because I realized I really only liked the 2009-2012 version of Soyeon.

The list is fancams and no text from here on out. I don't want the text to ruin your fap rhythms!

[MV Review] Got7 - "Hard Carry"

One of K-pop's better boy groups makes a pretty decent comeback.

Irene Loves Wendy's Ass

They just made the convo get MORE and MORE awkward lmao WHY😂pic.twitter.com/piq5iTWpQb

— j✿y (@teampied) September 24, 2016

Do you need any other reason to stan Irene?

Jieun - Bobby Doll

I've been waiting for a Jieun comeback for a while now after we got a few from Titsung in the past couple of years.

Crayon Pop - Doo Doo Shit

I made it five seconds. New record for me for the shortest time I've ever listened to a Kpop song. The beat that starts off the song is really, really awful, and knowing Crayon Pop's awful track record (FM aside), I knew I didn't want any more.

Healthy porn for men - deconstructing dog-whistle concepts in k-pop

Recently, a producer of the idol TV show "Produce 101" came out and openly admitted what I'd already known and had been telling people for years - that the show (and by implication, all idol groups with a similar theme) is basically jack-off material, or "healthy porn for men" as he describes it.  Several people were shocked - could this be true?  How come they hadn't noticed?  More importantly, how to identify this "healthy porn"?  Come on a journey with Kpopalypse into the world of dog-whistle concepts!

Fancam Appreciation DIA Edition - Chaeyeon and Yebin

Aw yeah.

NCT Dream - Chewing Gum

I really fucking hate this song. I tried listening to it three weeks ago when it came out, but I was so traumatized that I gave up after 30 seconds. Knowing that I had to spread the word about how awful this song is, three weeks later I'm listening to this song the whole way through. Can I make it?

DIA - Mr. Potter

Dear God,
Thank you for Chaeyeon and Yebin.
- Nayeon's Vibrator

Cheng Xiao's Pitch

Everyone remembers Jessica and Tiffany's pitches specifically for how...not so great they were. However I can see Cheng Xiao being known for how good hers was.

How AKF Ruined AOA - Part Two

[Author note: Enjoy these bite-sized fanfics so that I can post them more frequently during my business trips.]

Link to Part One.

The story so far: AKF had gone to Taiwan to have an orgy with Popu Lady, but he was raped by a fat prostitute that had every STD known to man. AKF tried committing suicide, but the Cyclops Overlord saved him. AKF then went to Korea to search for this mythical creature, but ended up getting sucked up in a f(x)/SNSD conspiracy plot with Kpopalypse that ended up with AKF blowing himself up, taking out Brave Brothers. AKF and Brave Brothers return to Earth, and AKF was on his journey of finding a replacement penis. At last, AKF found a match, but it was none other than Johnny Noh.

The Kpopalypse 2016 survey of caonima action – the results are in!

I'm far too lazy to repost the entire mammoth post here, but those of you who participated in and/or are interested in the results of the Kpopalyspe survey, click Qri for the results page!

Yuri x Seohyun - Secret

Yeah, I know, when everyone read the title of the subunit, they had hoped it was the first in a long series of SNSD JAV films. However, while it's not actual porn, this video features a lot of hair porn since this song doubles as a CF for Pantene.

Farewell

Kpop...

...kpop...

...kpop.

It has been a long and lovely road. I remember long ago, downloading songs from these new Jpop artists Hikaru Utada, Ayumi Hamasaki, and Mflo. On the same server I came across some tracks with new sorts of characters and a group called SES. I liked their music and some other music like it. "Oh My Love (Cyber Soul mix)" was my jam for a long time, and when I found videos of them I was entranced by how pretty they were, especially Eugene.

Yes dear, anything you want.

Technology and globalization was rather limited back then, so I kept a loose interest while focusing on other types of music, and unrelated became friends with some Koreans, which led to friendships with more Koreans for several years. Eventually, I saw Hyuna and she caught my interest, so I began watching Invincible Youth (some of the greatest television of all time) and got sucked right into the Kpop scene full force. It was a beautiful time for kpop, and having fallen for Hyomin on the show, I took a particular interest in T-ara.

This interest took me to a certain T-ara site, and there I decided to hang around in the chat room and became acquainted with some others, including those whom would go on to start this blog as a rebellion against the insanity of fangirls that we often contested with, and I joined very soon after. Ever since, kpop has been a true delight for me. I won't say it saved my life, but through some of the roughest times in my life, it must have saved my sanity with its unrelenting positivity and celebration of what makes us human. Surely, it is a much needed medicine for the high-pressure education system and many mind-numbing jobs throughout Korea.

Yet while I have continued to love kpop, my capacity to continue following it very closely and staying involved in the scene to know where everyone is at and make meaningful commentary has fallen off. I'm old now, I'm building a new life in a place far away from anything I ever knew, I'm learning Spanish, and I hope to be taking on much more than I have going on presently. It seems it is time to leave this scene to the hip kids who can properly keep up with it and the prolific non-kids like Kpopalypse who have an astonishing capacity for writing and found a way to make it work with their life.

Well, I don't want to drag this out too far. Goodbye my darlings.

Wagakki Band - Strong Fate

Wagakki Band has released a few songs this summer, but "Strong Fate" was my favorite by far. I think it's because of the melancholic chorus. This is one of the few slow songs by Wagakki Band that has really captivated me. I usually enjoy their fast songs a lot more, but for some reason, this is my favorite song of their's now.

Kpopalypse explains common song structures in k-pop

I'll post full results of the latest Kpopalypse survey later, but one of the big requests that is emerging is that people really want me to write a post about song structures in k-pop.  So, here it is!

Is Irene Even Real?

With the Russian Roulette promotions, I question whether Irene is an actual human or not.

Sunday Shitpost: Mina Edition

맞아 맞아 pic.twitter.com/MUnZs4sJ9o

— 미나야 (@Minayayayaya) September 10, 2016

Hm, I'm about to be busy packing clothes and getting ready to travel out of town for work. The scheduled posts will come out on Monday, Wednesday and Friday for the next few weeks. Starting in early October there will be a 30 post/30 day thing I'm running, so that should cover me for when I expect to be the busiest.

Anyway, Mina's cute as fuck, and just wanted to have one last final live post before I have to "bot post" for a month.

Why I Like Nayeon but not Tomomi Itano

@Seultoria I have no idea how you love Nayeon so much but fucking hate Tomomi.

— Asian Junkie (@asianjunkiecom) September 9, 2016

For anyone else wondering, read after the jump!

Sit on my Face, Nayeon

Turn me up to the highest setting and let me vibrate the hell out of you.

(I think today and tomorrow will be long days at work again and I'm still working on scheduled posts for the next 4-5 weeks since I'll only be home to write on the weekends.)

The Kpopalypse 2016 survey of caonima action

It's that time again - time for Kpopalypse to survey his readers!

If you feel like you're one of those who give a shit, feel free to click on the Qri below to be taken to the survey page!  Or if not, then don't!  Yay!

[MV Review] Red Velvet - "Russian Roulette" (Update)

SM has really been bringing it with their music (sans STATION)  this year.

Kpopalypse Nugu Alert Episode 21: Staz Of Man, Jaywon Jung, Sims

Kpopalypse is back to explore unknown Korean artists in another episode of the most unpopular eclectic series in k-pop blogging history, Kpopalypse Nugu Alert!

Read on and be entertained as Kpopalypse explores the depths of YouTube to find more music that you've probably never heard of!

I Just Can't Take Bobby Seriously

You kidding me?

Popu Lady for FHM

Good God, I love Popu Lady.

Brave Girls - Yoohoo

EUNJI IS BEST GIRL!

SM Fucks Over Seulgi

Don't you hate it when your bias gets fucked over in the styling department?

You make Irene look amazing as fuck and then leave Seulgi with this?!?! It looks like they scooped out pumpkin guts and then smeared it all over her head. They could have at least made the hairstyle salvageable.

Irene, We're Not Worthy

Jesus fucking Christ says it all.

Hwadog Lands First Leading Role

After her great acting caused T-ara to make more money than any other K-pop girl group, Ryu Hwadog gets her first leading role.

If it wasn't for the sympathy that she gets from Koreans (which means she is a great actress), there's no way someone as ugly as Hwadog could lead a drama. Just like in K-pop, looks are a major factor in dramas. No one is here to stan ugly people, and in order to export dramas to other countries, dramas want to portray Koreans as ridiculously good looking. Now Hwayoung will just have people wondering when the other members are going to eat her because of being a dog.

Great, now because of Hwadog, people are going to start asking me if I eat dogs again. Fuck you, Hwadog.

Han Ye Seul for High Cut

#하이컷 #highcut #샤넬 #ChanelCosmetics 😘

A photo posted by Han Ye Seul _ 한예슬 (@leslie_allwehaveisus) on Aug 31, 2016 at 12:29am PDT

Hey everyone, enjoy these pics of Ye Seul while I'm busy preparing a bunch of articles for when I'll be gone because of work. I'm trying to write two months worth of articles, so bare with the constant shitposts for now.

WJSN's Bona Getting Ready For Japanese Debut

Who else is ready for WJSN to debut in Japan?

K-Netz Confused About Soyu's Selcas

So Korean netizens are making a big deal out of Soyu showing her cleavage in a selca.

Does anyone even stan Soyu for her face? Everyone's just here for the TNA when it comes to Soyu, so be glad she crops off her forehead so that she can show off her cleavage. 

Why It's Important You Actually Read Up On Stuff

So you don't wind up as one of the idiots here.

For those of you out of the loop, OMG's YooA was recently accused of pulling a Tablo, only this time actually lying about her education, however she's not the one who was lying, so in the end, she kind of is Tablo in this situation.

Tymee Disses Unpretty Rapstar 3

You can read the details here.

Things Kpopalypse dislikes in music: k-pop ballads

It's well known that Kpopalypse doesn't like k-pop ballads, but why?  What is it about ballads that makes them suck so much?  Are there any good ballads?  If so, what makes a good ballad good, and a bad ballad bad?  Can ballads be bad meaning good?  Read on as Kpopalypse explores the trufax about k-pop ballads!

JYP x Hyoyeon x Min x Jo Kwon

Fans of Hyoyeon and Min, who have been friends for a long time, finally get their wish of a collaboration between the two. Unfortunately, it sounds like a piece of a crap Teddy composed. I feel bad for giving this MV a view because it doesn't even deserve a single view.

This has also furthered my conviction that Hyoyeon should never been in a subunit.

YG is Real Hip Hop

Too cool to pay their taxes.

TL;DR They used Bom's drug channels to hide profits and to shift income. See, Bom still had a role to play in YG instead of reminding people every day that it's Halloween.

Some Hot Girls & An Apology

Here's OMG's Binnie really going for it. In semi-related news, this week's Girl Group Wars post is going to be delayed until I'm fully moved. Sorry about that -- things should be back to the normal schedule next week, if everything goes according to plan. More pictures of hot girls to apologize for my lack of dedication are below the cut!

Inkigayo Cockblocks IOI

Inkigayo is cockblocking IOI. Music Core also cockblocks IOI, but that isn't making the news. Why this is making the news is because IOI possibly could have won on Inkigayo, or at the very least been a lot closer. Actually being there gives you more points or something (I don't know, I stopped caring about music show wins in early 2010 when SNSD was promoting "Run Devil Run", Kara was promoting "Lupin" and T-ara was promoting "I Go Crazy Because Of You" at the same time. Good times, and I stopped caring who won because in the end if you were a fan of all three, we were the winners.)

No, I present an alternative theory. In the age of the SJW, I wouldn't be surprised if someone hasn't said it yet. If someone hasn't actually made this claim, I am shocked.

INKIGAYO IS RACIST AGAINST HALF KOREANS LIKE SOMI! BOYCOTT THE RACIST FUCKERS! THEY DON'T WANT WHITEY ON STAGE!

Yang Hyun Suk's Guide to Promoting Black Pink

As you know, one of the ways for Kpop groups to become really popular is to promote in other avenues aside from music. It's how Kpop lures us all in for the long haul. However, Yang Hyun Suk has found an ingenious way to promote his new group.

Tiffany's guide to Korean culture and lifestyle

Ohmigosh, hi everybody it's Tiffany here!  I'm so happy to be here!  Kpopalypse always gets questions about Korean culture but he doesn't live in Korea, so he asked me to write something about my favourite country in the world for you who are thinking of coming to Korea!  This is absolutely unexpected and exciting and humbling all at the same time!  Let's learn all about Korea!

I Love Jessica

The ultimate fucking shade! Not long after Tiffany photoshopped Sica out of the 9th anniversary photo, Jessica posts this timely picture with the "I Love Seoul" caption near the bottom right.

Confirmed: Sica's Blanc & Eclare shades are made from Sica's shading. That's why they cost what they do.

CL - Lifted

I have a short review and a longer review below the jump.

[MV Review] WJSN - "Secret"

For those of you who saw the review before it was supposed to go up -  yeah I know I'm a fuck-up. I kept the original comments though. Anyway...

WJSN make their first comeback since their debut, and the MV is probably the best of the summer.

The Kpopalypse 2016 bias list

I have no fucking idea why so many people care about my biases in k-pop, but it seems that plenty of you do because I get asked questions about this shit all the time even though my bias lists are publicly available to all.  Nevertheless, I'll freely admit that the landscape of hot women in k-pop has changed somewhat since my last bias list post 18 months ago, and therefore a revisit of this important topic may be relevant, so that means it's time for an update!  Who is on the Kpopalypse bias list for 2016?

Girl Group Wars Round 1: Twice vs. Pledis Girlz, April vs. Sonamoo

Ready to dominate.

Welcome to the first round of AKF's Girl Group Wars! The intro post can be found here, and remember you can always follow along with the bracket here. Voting opens now and closes in a week. Let's get cracking!

Is Tiffany's Career Over?

If you're like me, you probably found while browsing Twitter on the shitter. (Fun fact: A 10-minute dump a day equals a week's worth of paid vacation. 10 minutes * 5 days * 48 weeks / 60 minutes = 40 hours.) Naturally, I'm basically the last blogger to post about Tiffany's short-lived solo career.

[MV Review] I.O.I. - Whatta Man

Tasteful concepts for underage girls are no longer an impossible dream!

suho_ftw's Favorite K-Pop Workout Songs

I had been thinking about doing it for a while so I finally got my gym membership in March and have been going to for 2-3 times a week as well as minor exercises on other days.  So I decided to make a list of my favorite workout songs. These are songs that inspire me to get off my ass or keep going for an extra minute or two so I thought I'd share them. I'm only giving twenty since there are soooooo many songs in k-pop that are suitable for work outs. No particular order either.

Momo Teases Us about the JAV We All Want to See

Yeah, I'd "watch" it over and over.

WJSN - "Secret" Teaser

Aw yeah, Cheng Xiao is 18 now.

SNSD Ruined SM Station

What's new with SNSD? I mean, aside from Tiffany photoshopping Sica out of the 9 Year Anniversary of the Hateful Eight.

The Kpopalypse Fandom Insanity Scale

With the emergence of YG's new girl group Blackpink who in true YG fashion have debuted a cool, casual 32 months behind schedule, curious caonimas now wish to know what I think of their fandom.

However, I wasn't sure that answering this question was a good idea.  Kpopalypse blog has always been about teaching k-pop fans to think for themselves rather just go along what what's trendy or accept what some dickhead on the Internet spoonfeeds them, even if that dickhead is me.  So rather than just answer these questions simply, I thought - why not give readers the tools to determine by themselves exactly how insane any given k-pop fandom is?  Enter the Kpopalypse Fandom Insanity Scale!

Seolhyun Gets Laid, Everyone Flips Shit

Seol has been listening to Kpopalypse's fashion advice, it would seem

So, Dispatch blew up their spot and now both agencies have confirmed that Seolhyun and Zico are dating ... aka that they are "comfortable sunbae-hoonbaes". Yeah, I bet they're comfortable. Reaaaaal comfortable.

She ran for the dick pic.twitter.com/kCJFr9w4jR

— Jade (@bIackvelvets) August 10, 2016

Meanwhile everybody is giving Seolhyun shit for running from a taxi to her man's house (admittedly: it is hilarious) while having the SHEER AUDACITY to wear a short dress in public.

Like A Cat, featuring modesty at its finest

I don't know why people are so shocked at the sight of her legs ... have these people never seen an AOA video before?

4. [+87, -16] How can she go in a man's house dressed like that? Way too short..

You better believe I dress cute when I'm going to see my boyfriend, and I'm nowhere close to being Seolhyun-level hot. No reason to waste that body on sweatpants.

Plus, as we've learned from this truly incredible piece of journalism, Zico knows how to treat a lady right. He might look like a prepubescent girl, always make her come to his place, or even ask her to dress up for him ... but there are some things that are always worth it.

Frankly, though, I'm most excited to watch the NetizenBuzz admin, a known Block B fangirl, continue to flip her shit via negative comment translation. Stay mad, everybody!