Friday, September 13, 2013

How To Play To Your Strengths *coughHyoricough* - Presented By Jolin Tsai

Some of you may be thinking "AKF, you UCAAD (Upstanding Citizen of African American Descent), why are you posting a video of Jolin Tsai?" Well, mainly because she's hot, but I'll pull something out of my ass and tie everything together.

I think I have made it evidently clear that I am not a fan of Hyori as an entertainer. I'm not a psychologist, but I do believe Hyori to be delusional if she happens to believe all the things that she says about herself. I know there's a fine line between being confident in your abilities and being delusional to the point of not accepting reality as is, and I think Hyori has teetered into the latter.

For the first ten years of Hyori's career, she was smart and played to her strengths. She knows that the only reason that she's popular is because guys want to pee in her butt. However, in the past five years, she has lost it and her last two albums have been absolutely terrible, not to mention that half of the Shitty Shitty Gang Bang album was plagiarized. Hyori thinks she is something that she's not. She believes that people like her for her songs, for her vocals, for her dancing, etc. Maybe a small percentage do, but Hyori isn't talented at all, and that's long as you play to your strengths.

Hey Mr. Big is the perfect example of Hyori playing to her strengths. The song is catchy, and most important of all, she's exuding her sexiness, which is why people pay attention to her in the first place. Now she thinks she's some ballad singer and I would rather have fire ants inserted into my ear canal before listening to Hyori singing another ballad again.

Jolin Tsai, on the other hand, is basically BoA + Hyori. Jolin can sing and dance and she's obviously a Chinese sex goddess. However, out of all the stuff I had seen from Jolin, I have yet to see her act as something that she's not, and she plays to her strengths. I mean, there's a whole music video from her Myself album focusing on her tits.

Just like in 玩愛之徒, Jolin shows ample cleavage in her new Journey music video (full version comes out in a few days). Jolin sticks to her strengths, which is her sex appeal, and incorporates it into her dancing (see the Agent J music video) while sticking to songs that work for her. Yes, she sings quite a few ballads, but after starting to promote those massive cannons on her chest, Jolin has had less ballads being promoted as singles. Hyori stopped focusing on her tits and started singing songs that weren't compatible with her. It would have been fine if it was just an experiment, but she thinks this is her "artistic side".

Just focus on tits. That's what I did while writing this incoherent article...which is why it's kind of a mess. But no one will really notice it when they watch the MVs.


  1. AKF u scat ?

    You don't need an excuse to post Jolin Tsai.

    Hyori is damn hot. I never fully listened to any of her songs.

    The new YT interface is another step back, fucking piece of shit google.

    1. I try to think of a good tie in as to post Jpop and Cpop on here since this is predominantly a Kpop blog.

  2. Make sure to tweet or post when the full song of Journey is released.

    In a way it kind of makes sense for Hyori to try to focus on something other than her bodily aspects (I don't think she should stop), she's not getting any younger and once that fades in the public eye, what is she going to do to promote herself? Might as well learn how to sing.

    1. Well, as an entertainer, you have to know when your time is up. Maybe it's up for Hyori.

  3. I can't wait for the downward spiral. I hope she never learns.