Saturday, July 9, 2016

Results of the KPOPALYPSE 2016 objectification survey part 2 – BEST FEMALE BOOBS and MALE ABS in k-pop!

It's time for part 2 of the results of the Kpopalypse 2016 objectification survey!  Let's find out who has the best boobs and abs in k-pop in 2016 according to Kpopalypse readers!


The second part is the "upper body" objectification results.  Readers were asked to nominate favourites and pick up to five for each of the six following categories:


For part 1 - the "lower body objectification" results, click here if you missed it.  Part 3, the overall hottest results will be coming soon.  Note that "best" boobs or abs doesn't necessarily mean "biggest", although it did for many - "best" just means "best" and readers were free to define "best" any way they chose.  No "suggestions" were given in order to prevent bias and give an accurate view of what readers thought, readers could pick anybody who is (or was) a k-pop idol.  The order people listed their idols in mattered - readers' first pick was weighted higher than their last pick.  Results that were ambiguous (by leaving out the group name, not being able to spell, mismatching an idol and their group etc) were disregarded.  Read on for the best boobs and abs!


#1 - Hyosung - Secret

1013 points
Hyosung was the clear leader, collecting more points than her closest three competitors combined.  The vast majority of people who voted had Hyosung somewhere in their list of five - but mostly right at the top.  Hyosung's "Find Me" comeback no doubt helped things along, and although it was actually visually relatively modest by k-pop music standards these days what with groups like Bambino and Pocket Girls practically giving themselves black eyes with their own jigginess, this probably only increased the thirst for Hyosung's more subtle approach.

#2 - Sunny - Girls' Generation

532 points
The biggest surprise about the position of SNSD's perennial busty favourite is how far she trailed behind Hyosung in terms of votes.  Still, given the wealth of competition, second place ain't a bad place to be.

#3 - Choa - AOA

233 points
Does she pad or does she not pad?  The correct answer according to readers seems to be "please don't disrupt my rhythm with such needless questions thank you".

#4 - Yura - Girl's Day

188 points
Even though she only seems to get them out about once per year, that seems to be a memorable enough event to satisfy boob afficionados and secure Yura a fourth place position.

#5 - Soyou - Sistar

152 points
Apparently this is a photo of a real person doing actual stuff in the world we live in, not the jacket cover for "CGI Girls With Big Tits In Tight Shirts Go Shopping part 26" (although if I'm wrong, please accept my preorder).

#6 - Hyuna

147 points
Hyuna's boobs these days doesn't look that much like they did from back in "Bubble Pop" days but that "I have a career and you don't" grin hasn't changed much.

#7 - Jaekyung - Rainbow

107 points
A quick Google search for "Jaekyung boobs" reveals a forum thread that asks "why didn't Jaekyung get famous from her boobs like Hyosung" and although the answer's fairly obvious, you should probably click that link anyway just for the entertaining way in which the question is asked.

#8 - Hyunyoung - Rainbow

95 points
Everyone in k-pop with big boobs put your hands up... Hyunyoung, I can't really see your hand, can you stretch a bit higher please?  Thank you.

#9 - Hyomin - T-ara

85 points
The bedroom scenes in that "Sketch" comeback certainly would have helped, but Hyomin's boobs look just fine even when she downplays them.

#10 - Puer Kim

74 points
Despite doing absolutely fuck-all this year, k-pop's Tura Santana Puer Kim sailed into tenth position easily just off the backs of people's PTSD.  That's "Post-Tits Stress Disorder", a medical condition that brings on panic attacks, heavy perspiration and flashbacks to large boobs in a music video two years ago whenever a certain k-pop girl's name is mentioned.

#11 - Hyorin - Sistar

73 points
Hyorin looks better than she probably ever has in Sistar's "I Like That" and it seems a few of you noticed.  It's amazing how good someone can look when they don't have to wear stupid beach clothing all the time.

#12 - Yuna - AOA

71 points
You armchair k-pop business experts say whatever poorly-researched bullshit you want about FNC but there's no denying that the "Cream" unit promoting the lesser-known three girls was a smart idea that paid off even if the song was kind of shit, and the results of the Kpopalypse boobs poll showed it.  Did you know that there's more than one Japanese pornstar called Yuna?  I found this out while searching up Yuna from AOA with Google Safesearch turned off.  I hope you all appreciate the hazards Kpopalypse faced in bringing you this image.

#13 - Minhee - Stellar

67 points
Size definitely wasn't a factor here but more presentation - ever since "Marionette", Stellar's agency have excelled at shoving Minhee's bitchstare and trussed-up cleavage front and center in a way that few others in k-pop have dared.  The effort certainly was appreciated by Kpopalypse readers!


#14 -
#15 - Jei - Fiestar
#16 - Seolhyun - AOA
#17 - Kyungri - Nine Muses
#18 - Qri - T-ara
#19 - Yezi - Fiestar
#20 - Ailee
#21 - Jihyo - Twice
#22 - Jimin - AOA
#23 - Yubin - Wonder Girls
#24 - Clara
#25 - Cao Lu - Fiestar
#26 - Nara - Hello Venus
#27 - Min - (ex) miss A
#28 - Hyerin - EXID
#29 - Gain - Brown Eyed Girls
#30 - Lee Hyori
#31 - Momo - Twice
#32 - Seohyun - Girls' Generation
#33 - Tiffany - Girls' Generation
#34 - Jimin - 15&
#35 - Hyoeun - Stellar
#36 - Narsha - Brown Eyed Girls
#37 - Jessica
#38 - Taeyeon - Girls' Generation
#39 - Jihyun - (ex) 4Minute
#40 - Ellin - Crayon Pop
#41 - Jessi
#42 - NS Yoon G
#43 - Sungah - Nine Muses
#44 - Sulli - Cao Ni Ma Enterprises


Always one to stand up for equal rights in k-pop, it's time for Kpopalypse to objectify male k-pop performers and hopefully annoy everyone equally regardless of their gender and sexuality.

#1 - Jimin - BTS

166 points
Jimin at the top again, however unlike the ass poll where he dominated the competition easily, Jimin only pulled firmly into the lead in the abs race on about the fifth day of voting.

#2 - Taecyeon - 2PM

147 points
What is actually happening there in his solar plexus region, it looks like the foetus from the Alien films is about to pop out.  Didn't seem to bother Kpopalypse readers though who would presumably be happy to be splattered with Taecyeon's space goo.

#3 - Minho - SHINee

142 points
You all know that the makeup artists paint their abs to give them extra definition before they go on stage, right?  You believe me, right?  Hmm... looking at this, maybe I don't even believe me.

#4 - Kyungil - History

116 points
The above iconic shirt-lifting moment from History's "Might Just Die" MV (at 2:32 - you're welcome) was probably solely responsible for pushing Kyungil from k-pop nugus History into the upper tier of this list.  I swear this guy shows his abs more often than he shows both of his eyes at once.

#5 - Siwon - Super Junior

112 points
A shining beacon of pansexual tolerance and acceptance, Siwon has never been averse to flashing some raw man-meat to get his audience excited while furthering the cause of male body appreciation.  Just so you know, a flannelette shirt tied around the waist is handkerchief code for "do me like I'm Kurt Cobain and you're Courtney Love with a strap-on".

#6 - Xiumin - EXO

109 points
Xiumin always looks like a bit of a git when he's flashing his chest muscles for some reason, this is the least-embarrassing photo of him I could find.  Don't tell Amy I wrote this.

#7 - Wonho - Monsta X

100 points
Wonho seems slightly more built than the average k-pop guy, and it seems Kpopalypse readers approved and propelled him safely onto this list despite his group's still-nugu status.

#8 - Rain

89 points
I keep forgetting that this guy even exists at all in k-pop but it seems that my readers didn't.  The tastefully-unbuttoned jeans seems like a thoughtful touch that the photographer talked him into and that I hope you all appreciate, because Rain himself sure looks awkward as fuck about it.

#9 - Taeyang - BigBang

83 points
The fact that one of his recent music videos was nothing but a camera gradually zooming out over his abs for four minutes probably helped Taeyang edge up a few places on this list.

#10 - Jonghyun - SHINee

76 points
Not sure what's going on in this picture but Jonghyun does look undeniably healthy, I guess hefting Hitomi Tanaka's huge boobs must do wonders for the physique.

#11 - Jay Park

70 points
Jay Park seems to enjoy scribbling all over himself, so maybe he should consider getting permanent abs tattooed onto him, then he can spend less time at the gym and devote some extra energy into learning how to write a decent song for a change.

#12 - Suho - EXO

60 points
Oh look, he's got light-up shoes.  Leave a comment below if you were so thirsty that you didn't even notice until you read this.

#13 - Jungkook - BTS

53 points
Finishing off the top contenders is another BTS member.  Jungkook doesn't seem to flash his abs nearly as much as Jimin onstage but instead does so at Idol Athletics or whatever the fuck this is, although god knows why.


#14 - Shindong - Super Junior
#15 - Jackson - GOT7
#16 - Changmin - TVXQ
#17 - Kikwang - Beast
#18 - Lay - EXO
#19 - Shownu - Monsta X
#20 - Bobby - iKon
#21 - Jota - Madtown
#22 - Leejoon - MBLAQ
#23 - Minhyuk - BTOB
#24 - JB - GOT7
#25 - Chansung - 2PM
#26 - Daesung - BigBang
#27 - Jaehyo - Block B
#28 - Hoya - Infinite
#29 - Yongguk - BAP
#30 - Jinwoon - 2AM
#31 - Kai - EXO
#32 - Nickhyun - 2PM
#33 - J-Hope - BTS
#34 - Yoseob - Beast
#35 - Hongbin - VIXX
#36 - T.O.P - BigBang
#37 - Eunhyuk - Super Junior
#38 - Leeteuk - Super Junior
#39 - Woohyun - Infinite
#40 - Casper - Cross Gene
#41 - Jongup - BAP
#42 - Junho - 2PM
#43 - JYP
#44 - Ravi - VIXX

That's all for this post, but before I go away and work on part 3, here's a question someone had:

What is objectification? Is it when you treat a person as merely a tool for your pleasure? Does that mean every musician I listen to, I objectify, because they are the means through which I obtain aural pleasure? From what I've read, objectifying someone takes place mainly in a sexual context. Does that mean if I evaluate the attractiveness of an idol, I am objectifying them? Or perhaps ranking them on a "top 5 best ass" list like here. Yet that seems almost inevitable right? People judge the attractiveness of other people subconsciously. Objectifying someone also seems to mean that I don't care about their existence beyond what they can provide to me in pleasure. If I do care for these idols as people, does that mean I am not objectifying them anymore? Assume that 2 people are in some sort of friendly/romantic relationship where each cares about the other and their well-being. They derive pleasure from being around the other person, but understand that the other is a person in their own right with their needs and desires. I don't think this is objectification. So I guess the question is, do you care about these idols beyond their fulfillment of a sexual desire for you? If you don't, then that's probably objectification (and shame on u!!). If you do, then it doesn't seem like it is. Is that just a bad excuse to do stuff like this survey? Maybe, but I think it's an important distinction to make.

The answer is that all people are objects, this is scientific fact.  However this doesn't mean that they aren't also people!  Feminist literature tends to complain about people "reducing others to objects" which promotes the fallacy that people can't be objects of sexual desire/attraction and people at the same time.  However, what can we as fans in another country honestly assess?  The idol system is really good at creating the illusion that you "know" the person and that you have some kind of "special connection" to them, but the reality is that you don't know them at all - a reality that hits fans with rose-coloured glasses like a brick when they find out who their idols have been dating/raping/extorting/etc.  However what you DO know to a larger degree is what they look like - so why not appreciate what you know for sure, and disregard the rest?  Part 3 coming soon!

shindonggym copy


  1. Wow even Kpopalypse oppar expects Min to leave miss A...

  2. Damn, I should have voted for Shindong 5 times for the male abs instead of leaving it blank.

  3. Qri only making #18 is disappointing.
    She worked so hard recently to get them bigger (looking) and more appealing.

  4. Jaehyo is on HM??? That's unacceptable!!1!

  5. "Objectification" was a lame 18th century attempt to create a non-religious reason why sex outside marriage is wrong. It is disappointing how so-called feminists promote an idea created by a reactionary male philosopher like Immanuel Kant.

  6. Lmfao shindong, goodness i love your readers. yea, i didnt notice his shoes. Lmfao im going to burn for ogling

  7. I'm starting to think all of Suho's votes belong to suho_ftw unnie.

    1. lol I only voted once (I only do surveys once as I rarely have the time to do it multiple times.) Suho's always been known in EXO to have some pretty decent abs.

  8. It's been a good couple of days for Jimin. Also the light up Suho's light-up shoe kept distracting me XD

  9. How Choa ranked higher than Yura/Soyou/Puer Kim confuses me, but she's still hot so whatever.

    I would understand if Jimin got lower on the abs poll (they sorta disappeared during 2015 and J-Hope actually has the best abs in BTS now), but I'll never understand how Jungkook got in the ass poll. He's got nice thighs but no ass.

    1. His thighs are the best, but he has a nice ass too (not as great as Jimin tho...)

  10. Oppar has shoes on?? I didn't notice..

  11. Or Yuna just has nice boobs

  12. I'm someone who finds small tits appealing, probably because my own are enormous, so I picked Momo for best boobs. Although her boobs aren't that small, but they are small. I wish there were more flat chested girl in kpop. I mean, really flat chested. Like ironing board flat chested.

    Loli flat chested.

    1. It is unusual for a woman to be totally flat.

  13. tfw no Armin Arlert on the list

    Listen man, he didn't die to be ignored! I mean he didn't die yet and he's a fictional character not a kpop idol but still: Dem abs. Bet you didn't see that one coming, did ya? Where's your stereotypical weak ass little bitch crybaby now!?

  14. I completely forgot to namedrop the nugus of all nugus, Up10Tion
    It's creepy though
    Xiao (He's 17)
    Sunyoul (literally looks like he's about to be taken into Pedobear Oppar's white van)

  15. Taeyang is the best dude in kpop I swear
    He has the abs and oh man when he smiles I cum every tiem

  16. I dont believe that's hyuna in that photo

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