I hesitated to write about SM's latest marketing scheme, Younique Unit dance team. The unit's made up of the best dancers in some of SM's biggest groups. It's got SNSD's Hyoyeon, SuJu's Eunhyuk, SM orphan Henry, Little Taemin, and a couple Exos. But that's not all Younique boasts. To quote reputable news source Allkpop: "This is the first time an entertainment agency has collaborated with a car company to release an album."
In short, SM and Hyundai have mated and spawned this music ad-eo.
I knew going into this to expect a still-steaming pile of feces, but even with those SM-adjusted standards, I was surprised at what a piece of shit this was.
In true SM fashion, it wasn't enough to advertise its groups or cars; SM had to sneak in embedded ads for some of its shitty other products, too.
Yo dawg, I heard you like ads ...
In "MAXSTEP" (that's the name of this "song," btw), I sat through two and a half minutes of man waving only to have Hyoyeon come out and proceed to take a verbal dump in my ears. Ugh. I think it was supposed to be a rap. I-I'm not sure.
This video's worst crime: The dancing isn't that remarkable. There weren't any moves that struck me as younique or any moments in the video in which I was awed by the group's precision. And for a music video based around
selling cars and people dancing, there's a whole lot of boring closeups.
The music video is just me in front of a brick wall for three and a half minutes. It cost $80 million.
"MAXSTEP" also reminds me a lot of another music ad-eo, 2NE1's "Please Stop the Music" (or whatever that was called). Surprisingly, even without the promise of good dancing, the 2NE1 song was more tolerable.
At least we had Legos in our video, bitches.
Best part of "MAXSTEP"?
BOTTOM LINE: No, just no.