Tuesday, February 14, 2012

Happy Valentines Day!

To celebrate this lovey-dovey event, a little contest will be held here!

Read after the break...

All you have to do is either: (link/post/comment one of the following)
1) Make a hilarious captioned K-pop screen cap regarding Valentines Day (photoshopping is encouraged)
2) Write an erotic fanfiction between Hyoyeon and Amber (this is a tough one! If you can actually make it good, then you are almost guaranteed to win [no, not actually. There are no guarantees in life]) {those two are chosen because no one wants to write one about them. And we already have too many Hyomin and Eunjung ones}
3) Make a Rage Comic about fangirls
4) [this one comes from one of our readers] Write a poem/song/rap summarizing the best "lulz-worthy k-pop moment"

The winner gets to have one of the authors here (of their choice) be their Valentine! (I actually did not get the approval from any of the other authors so. Umm. This will take some coercing. Perchance, by default, you might get me though if none agree. Sorry.) Or a handjob from davidfresh!

If any entry is really good, by the end of this week, the best entries will be posted at the bottom of this article (or in a new post entirely).

Good luck and Happy Valentines Day, everyone!

57 comments:

  1. noonar if i win will u go out with me

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  2. if I do hyoyeon = hyomin + jiyeon? mmk? the real hyoyeon is too hideous to even consider

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    Replies
    1. Just for starter, hyomin and jiyeon share one bedroom and hyomin enjoys sleeping naked. All the sexfic pervs can continue on from here.......

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    2. I thought Eunjung was the one that likes to sleep naked?

      Oh, I can only imagine what goes on when Eunjung decides to 'sleep over' in Jiyeon and Hyomins room... unf.

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    3. Well, you won't have to imagine any longer...inb4 true sexfic

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    4. There won't be any real prizes for winning this dumbass contest, and no one is going to take a Hyoyeon-Amber fic seriously anyway. Just scroll down and read the horrifying entries.

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    5. She wasn't surprised when Soyeon came back with yet another guy on her arm; even less so when she turned on the light and asked her if she could please sleep somewhere for a bit because. Just because, and she made sure to close the door on their giggling and Soyeon's occasional yelps of delight.

      No one else was around. She'd pretty much had the whole place to herself for a week now while the others went back to family or somewhere nice for a holiday. She'd chosen to stay behind, however; such moments spent away from responsibility and from always being under the constant gaze of someone - anyone - had finally gotten to her. She was alone. Alone. The word had never held such special meaning for her before.

      Except for Soyeon, who frequently spent entire days out and never returned texts or calls. She didn't recognize the new guy, and thought that he might just be a keeper - if only because of his terrible hair. She hadn't talked much to Soyeon in the days since Japan. It wasn't like they'd grown apart or anything, but she did always hold that if you didn't have anything to talk about, then you really didn't have anything to talk about. They were still friends, for the most part.

      Friends. Out of the seven of them, the one she missed most was still Hyomin. Boram never said anything and frequently spaced out in the middle of a conversation; Hwayoung always tried to grab at her breasts when she thought she wasn't looking and once walked in on her naked 'accidentally, I swear!'; Jiyeon was always busy with something and Qri hung out exclusively with guys. But Hyomin was always there. Hyomin with that easy, irresistible smile; Hyomin with that gay, tinkling laugh; Hyomin with those curious fingers that traced careful patterns down her back; Hyomin with those soft, liquid eyes that -

      Fuck. No. That was in the past now. Hyomin had a boyfriend, whatever his name was, and she was perfectly happy with him. Just like they should, or she should be; they made a cute couple, and whatever feelings she had left for her best friend would have to stay that way. Fuck him, and fuck it all. Life still went on - alone.

      But there was a shriek of pure pleasure from the bedroom that was very recognizably Soyeon, and she figured that it would probably be best if she spent the night in one of the other rooms instead if she were to get any sleep. It wasn't like they'd know, anyway; Qri didn't like it when other people came in her room, much less sat on her bed; Jiyeon tended to drool, which produced a distinctive bed-scent in the mornings; Hyomin was a notoriously light sleeper and would swear at anyone who woke her up, intentionally or no. Whatever. They didn't lock their rooms, and she collapsed into Jiyeon's bed with a sigh.

      "Is someone there?" She started in surprise at the unexpected voice. "Eunjung? Is that you?"

      It was Hyomin. "Eunjung?" She called again, her voice muffled with sleep.

      She said nothing, but climbed into Hyomin's bed. "What are you doing in here?" she whispered. "Is that Soyeon in your room?"

      She nodded, and put her arms around that slender waist, drawing her closer. "I didn't hear you come in," she said softly. "I thought you forgot to bring the keys."

      "I didn't, and what are you doing in my bed? I'm - " But she put her lips to hers, interrupting that damnably beautiful girl and for a brief, precious moment, there were no more words to be said. She kissed those soft lips that she remembered so well; that faint taste of lip gloss that always lingered long after she'd licked the last of it off; the shy, awkward motions of her tongue that met hers in search of the long-lost relationship they'd swore to always hold dear.

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    6. I missed you, she whispered. She licked an elfin ear as her hands explored vertiginous territory; Hyomin said nothing, but pulled off her pajamas. I thought you slept naked. She smiled. There wasn't anyone around to keep me warm, she replied, and she her breath caught in her throat as her best friend slowly brought a finger up her bare thighs. I hope Hwayoung doesn't see this, she said, and they giggled like the teenage girls that they once were.

      "Eunjung! For fuck's sake, wake up!" She grunted as a pillow thumped her aside the head and rolled over. "Oi! We have to get up now!"

      She sat up and ran a finger through mussed hair. A half-dressed and angry Soyeon stood before her, gesturing at the clock. What a fucking dream to have - literally. She hoped Soyeon hadn't caught her talking in her sleep again; the last time it happened, she barely got away with saying she'd dreamed she was back on the set of Queen Insoo again.

      On the way to the bathroom, she ran into Hyomin who was clad in nothing but an oversized Tigers jersey and panties, and whistling a new tune that she'd learned to play on the guitar. She winked at her, and for a moment Eunjung wanted nothing more than to go over and do everything she'd ever dreamed of to her.

      (She makes sounds that are new and precious to Eunjung; her lips press soft and shy against hers; her curves are thoroughly and unrelentingly explored by Eunjung's lustful hands. Hyomin, she says quietly. I love you. But Hyomin says nothing, and they lose themselves in each other as Hwayoung looks on with mouth agape.)

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    7. is that like a firequakes fic

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    8. Nigga u need 2 read d qn

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  3. Fine, I will play into your sick little game Shin-B noona... I pick option 2 (I am gay, so i don't know anything about vaginas, so if im incorrect in anything i say about vaginas, im sorry):

    The frosty nights of Daebu islands are not welcoming to the most bearish of men, let alone the hallyu stars of Invincible Youth 2. As the members slumber in their sleeping bags, two particular females couldn't sleep. Hyoyeon and Amber, two of the more evidently masculine members, were too busy dealing with a irritable case of being lost in translation. See, Hyoyeon had a sick little fetish that she kept to herself, she was a fan of the infamous squid porn that Japanese AV stars have made famous. Unfortunately she had not found a suitable candidate for her kinky fascination, until now...
    Amber lay there in her boxers, her perky mosquito bites point forward, erect with fear laced with curiosity. She awoke to Hyoyeon standing before her with a large, red bucket of water with an ambiguous brown creatures swaying inside. She knew of Hyoyeons crave for women, and herself has thought previously of making a move on her, but no courage has yet been mustered. As soon as Amber was about to speak, Hyoyeon pushed a single, smooth finger towards ambers pronounced lips. "shh" she let out with sensuality unbeknown to the human form. She pulled Ambers hand, helped her up, and lead her towards the back of the Invincible Youth house. The cold winds made both Hyoyeons and Ambers nipples more erect than they already were. The hair on the back of Ambers neck, which there was copious amounts of, stood up, protruding from soft yet rugged skin. Hyoyeon put down her bucket and preceded to point at a couch. "Go lay down, i want to show you something". Amber leapt towards the couch, filled with curiosity and excitement about the what the following events may be, yet she had a good idea. Sadly, she was very wrong.
    Hyoyeon moved towards Amber. Slowly she pulled down her boxers, revealing 2 soft supple lips. Hyoyeon moved towards with her head, slowly poked out her tounge, and traced down her belly button down to the lips. She entered with her tongue and licked around it, teasing it. She slowly entered, and tasted a musky, sweet mucus. As Amber was about to moan in pleasure, Hyoyeon exited, and moved over to the bucket.
    As Hyoyeon set up her camera, Amber was starting to get anxious. "What is the camera for unnie" Amber asked apprehensively, "Have you ever heard of Squid porn?" Hyoyeon asked inquisitively.
    "No, what does it mean?"
    "You are about to find out"
    "Find out what?"
    "You'll see"
    "Boing boing?"
    Hyoyeon slowly pulled out a squid typically found in the mud shores of Daebu island.
    "Boing Boing???"
    She approached Amber, with malice and perversion in her eyes.
    "BOING BOING?!"
    Hyoyeon dropped the squid on Ambers warm pussy. It squirmed inside her wet, pink vagina, sensing the warmth inside, it made a burrow inside, wriggling and turning, causing Amber to, herself, starting to gasp and squirm in ecstasy.
    Hyoyeon recorded the preceeding events. Another squid, another squid, until her pussy was bursting with tentacles. Amber couldn't hold in her pleasure, and let out a scream of pleasure. All the while, Hyoyeon stand aside, fingering herself. She extracted a squid from ambers pussy, to her delight, and ate it. Picking of each leg, and slowly chewing it. Tasting and smelling Ambers sweet and sour pussy.
    "What is this?" Jiyoung screamed in shock and horror. She then went to wake up the other members, but by the time they came back, Hyoyeon and Amber were sleeping on the couch. Camera, bucket of squids gone.
    "Shut the fuck up, i was sleeping" Suzy exclaimed, displeased with Jiyoungs disregard for her beauty sleep. Jiyoung went back to bed, thinking it was only a sick, perverted dream.

    All the while, a single squid is swimming in the juices of Ambers pussy.

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    Replies
    1. Holy fuck that's enough internet for one day.

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    2. I cannot possibly be the only one who noticed that he is gay

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    3. No,you are not the only one. He is a fucking chink fag, enough said.

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  4. Replies
    1. All these efforts for Hyoyeon and Amber? Even you are a fag you should have known better.....I will never write a homofic featuring JYP and KKS, for example.

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    2. Now I'm interested.

      MAKE IT HAPPEN

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  5. holy shit that fanfic. I'm in love.

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  6. A SPACETIME ADVENTURES

    The year is 2014, after the great apocalypse, the land is in ruins.
    In 2012, The end of the world happened, it was bad.
    For some reason, Hyoyeon is sent to investigate an alien life form that landed on earth.

    Commander Amber: Hyoyeon in! I have updated information on alien spacecraft!
    Hyoyeon: No time to talk, I am fighting mutant monsters.
    Mutants: We do not like Girls Generation! Go Please!

    Hyoyeon kills 100 mutants and proceeds to go to aliens.
    She comes to the alien ship, but it is empty and has not been found.

    Hyoyeon: Commander Amber I am here but there's nothing here!
    Commander Amber: SU .. M.. O.. . LE ... S.. N.
    Hyoyeon: I do not understand what you say, there must be something wrong with the walkie-talkie connections.

    Just then the robots attack.

    Robots: It is Hyoyeon! Kill it!
    Hyoyeon fights and kills many of the robots, but dies anyway and dies from robot lasers.

    A year later, Hyoyeon is brought back to life on the space station of aliens.

    Hyoyeon: Where am I? Am I to people or mutants or robots? MAYBE aliens?
    Aliens: Yes Hyoyeon, welcome back.
    Hyoyeon: Welcome back? I was never here.
    Alien: You were here, sometimes, try to remember.

    Hyoyeon recalls.

    THE END

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    Replies
    1. You are disqualified. Nothing erotic about your fanfic, unless the mere mention of Hyoyeon will give you an erection.......

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    2. That was a failfic

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    3. THAT WAS THE MOST FRIGGIN' HILARIOUS THING OUT OF ALL OF THE CRAP POSTED ON HERE!!! SOLID GOLD!!! The ending was best cuz it made absolutely not sense.

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    4. Fuck off and die.

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    5. For people that liked it, you can find me in the chatango chat on this blog, I'm actually kinda funny sometimes

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  7. Wow AKF bringeth the fap out.

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  8. I'm quite sure the original sexfic anon isn't going to want a handjob from david loool

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  9. a hyoyeon/amber fanfic for some Shin-B action? eh....fuck it, i don't want to work that hard. time for photoshop

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  10. (FUCK blogspot, only accepts 4096 characters. had to divide into 2 parts)

    Hyoyeon and Amber have a sunbae/hoobae relationship for the past few years.Occasionally they went out shopping,eating together. However its these past few months that Amber starts to think of Hyoyeon in a different way, and the sheer thought scares her.

    One night while lying in bed, Amber ask Krystal what do she think of sex between two women? Krystal, with a smile on her face replied cheekily there's nothing wrong with it and it's a beautiful thing. Amber prod on further by asking what about Hyoyeon unnie and I? Krystal seemed shocked but quickly replied in a playful way she'd love that to happen as she always gay around with her sica unnie too.

    Set forward to a few weeks later after SNSD had successfully concluded their France tour, Lee Soo Man has personally opened up a party for celebration. The party was set at 7pm and Amber had been waiting for this night all week. During Hyoyeon absence in Korea, she had scout around youtube for the fancams of her favourite unnie and just the thought of Hyoyeon sitting beside her makes her excited. Just the thought of what she would wear and how she will smell makes her wet.

    Soon everyone started to arrive at the restaurant and the moment Amber had been waiting for, Hyoyeon walked in wearing a black low cut dress that showed every curve of her body, her entrance turned many heads including Amber. They greeted each other with a hug, the breast pressed tightly together and Amber could feel her nipples getting hard. She wondered if Hyoyeon could feel it, and did she like it? When they let go of one another, Hyoyeon gave Amber a look that she had never seen before, does this mean she enjoyed it? Dinner was almost over and the music had started, being the dancing queen in f(x), Hyoyeon asked if Amber wanted to dance. Within minutes they were on the dance floor.

    Amber could not keep her eyes off Hyoyeon, how she had imagined herself licking HY nipples , the thoughts racing through her head were driving her crazy. HY had realized that Amber had been staring at her, and she softly whispered in Amber's ear, would you like to escort me to the ladies room? Without say a word Amber followed her, carrying her little backpack at the back.

    By the time they headed down to the last stall she was kissing the back of Amber's neck, could this be a dream? Amber hope not.Amber decided to placed her lips against HY and kissed her passionately. They were both breathless by time it ended.

    Slowly Amber knelt before HY and used her fingertips to separate the lips of HY engorged sex. Her tongue came out to lap gently at the wetness that had built there. Her tongue stud tapped against HY's clit, further inflaming her body. HY moaned throatily, her breathing becoming immediately erratic and her fingernails dug into her palm and her toes curled as she struggled through the orgasm.

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  11. Continued from above^...)

    Amber took one of HY's breasts in her hand and she rolled the nipple between her thumb and forefinger before pinching it. HY gasped at the near pain. Amber clamped something onto HY nipple. It squeezed tightly but was rubber tipped so it didn't hurt too much. She followed suit with the other nipple then set something on her stomach. Wires tickled HY's breasts and it took a moment for her to realize they were attached to the nipple clamps. Amber grinned to herself as she put the clamps vibrator on the lowest setting. It was quiet as a mouse as it hummed sending little jolts of electric pleasure through HY. She moaned again and Amber took her position between HY's splayed thighs. She enjoyed this level of access as she gripped the thick shaft she wore and lined it up at HY's entrance.

    HY's world had narrowed down to this small cubicle shrouded in darkness. The blindfold Amber had her wearing was so efficient she had no idea if the restroom light was on or not. She felt the monster Amber wore pushing into her tight entrance and willed herself to relax and take it. Amber grunted as her progress was halted by the ring of muscles at HY's opening. She applied steady pressure until finally they gave way allowing the head and two inches of the enormous shaft in. Amber's back arched as her breath left her in a rush. "There we go. Unnie take that big fat dick." Amber said. She withdrew slightly then pushed forward again burying another two inches into HY.

    "Oh God!" HY cried out. Amber decided to raised the vibration on her nipples up another level and she moaned raggedly. Amber continued moving her hips slowly until she had the dildo buried to the root in HY. Slowly Amber began moving in and out of HY's pussy watching as HY grew wetter with each stroke.

    HY's mind raced as she tried to process the different sensations. The humming on her nipples was divine she knew but she couldn't seem to focus on any one stimulus. Amber was filling her as never before and it was so borderline. Her thrusts came faster and heavier and HY can felt her orgasm building deep inside of her. Her walls clutched at the thick intruder every time Amber withdrew as though they didn't want it to leave.

    Just as HY was ready to explode, Amber withdrew and HY cried out in frustration. Amber replied" Unnie i want you to cum into my face".

    Getting down on her knees, Amber place her head in between HY legs this time round. HY had opened her legs wider so that Amber's tongue would have no problem finding her perfectly trimmed pussy. Amber then began to suck HY's clit which was already getting bigger with angry red lips showcasing her arousal. HY couldn't take it any longer and held Amber's head very tight against her pussy; she was literally begging for Amber to make her cum.

    Amber began sucking HY so hard that warm cum starts dripping in her mouth. Feeling that HY unnie could cum any moment, Amber starts pounding harder with her tongue, meeting the same resistance from the muscles at HY's entrance. Finally HY orgasm started deep within her and rippled outward until she felt it tingling through her entire body. She screamed wordlessly as her body bucked and Amber had to gripped HY's hips tightly to hold her still.

    Both of them once again hugged each other, and smiled it had been the best SM ent party ever.

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    Replies
    1. oh god. I'm too scared to read this.

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    2. I can't believe I actually read it. I'm a straight girl.

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    3. So? What's wrong for being straight?

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    4. No...shes a girl. Pics or gtfo

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  12. Someone has been watching waaay too much porn

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  13. Hyoyeon and Amber walk into a room.

    bang.

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    Replies
    1. They both got killed by LXM slamming the door on them?

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    2. They didn't die. Hyober just spawned the Antichrist and ate JYP alive. They masturbated on 2NE1 and claimed YG's HQ as their evil sexbot fap lair from which they will dominate the K-pop world.

      The prophecies have spoken~

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  14. Write about yunjae they are so real ,todays about love

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    Replies
    1. they are so not real

      Write about Amber and suzy, they flirt with each other all the time

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    2. seriously ambers a total lez for suzy while suzy takes it as being friendly anyone can tell amber wants to bang her

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  15. shin-b.
    your lips are red like wine.
    please be my valentine.
    i'd like to make you mine.
    and to make this entry valid.
    hyoyeon's hair is amber.
    now please get into my secret chamber.
    where I'm ready to pamper.

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  16. Since no did comics, I just wanted to share a quick comic i did in class, the link to the pic is below. and yeah im new here, never really bothered to comment unless is worth commenting so yeah. if you don't know the akb reference, go to wiki or something.
    Toodles ^__^

    http://i40.tinypic.com/34qway8.jpg

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    1. lol very cute.

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    2. Except for the fact that FFFFFFFUUUUUUUUUUUU face is not supposed to actually say "fuck". He just says "FFFFFFFUUUUUUUUUUUU".

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    3. You must be new here.

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    4. I just realized the last part in the comic and i fixed it. here's the corrected version. i wonder if someone can tell me why that JYP dude is on the background, he just has that scary pedo look to him.EEEEEEWWWWWWWWWWW~

      http://i43.tinypic.com/wipszl.jpg

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    5. Noonar i likey likey dis wat do unf

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  17. Shinbee noonar mai penisu not very biggu

    Can haz sucking? Thnx <3

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  18. Replies
    1. that's why amber is so into her

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    2. Damn right she is

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    3. Suzy is a fat whore

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  19. Damn right nigg Suzy is a fat whore

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  20. *//when things are in between slashes like this it means I want to italicize them but cannot//

    //so much lip gloss// was all Amber could think about in the semi-lit room. Hyoyeon's lips sparkled, unlike her skin, already glistening with small beads of sweat. She reached one hand out and slowly, so slowly, she wiped it away with a finger. Their mouths collided like they had a few moments ago, like things made sense and didn't all at once.
    Hyoyeon had been watching Amber for a while. She knew Amber had been watching her as well. Sticking her ass out a little more when she danced, hitching her tiny, tight shorts up just that bit further up her voluptuous thighs, dropping a little bit of water on her white tank as she guzzled from the bottle in exhaustion, and already, they were here. Amber was young, but quick to take a hint. It wasn't much; just an old, badly lit storeroom. Not a place for fairy tales. But then, they weren't little girls; they were barely women as they scratched at each other's necks, as neatly stitched buttons flew off their branded shirts. They were animals, but that was okay because they were animals together.
    Amber ploughed her hand up Hyoyeon's long, straight locks. They were greasy from dancing and product, but that was alright. It was better than alright; she felt no guilt as she tore a few away. The girl in front of her winced a little, and tears began to form at the corners of her eyes as they stared at each other, neither giving up the battle between their tongues. She tasted like Maybelline; the plastic, suffocating taste was in both their mouths now, not that it made a difference. Amber reached towards Hyoyeon's now bare back, and undid the clasp of her bra, slipping off her own. They didn't have much to show in the chest department, but its not like it mattered. Hyoyeon pinned Amber down on a counter and her teeth flew to her hard nipples, teasing at first, then taking long, luxurious licks, revelling in the pleasure of her younger counterpart moaning deeply in the background. Being slow was key, so slowly, so slowly, she licked the girl's flat stomach, down to her belly button, down, down down, until she tasted fabric. Amber's jeans were easy enough to slip out of, her boyish underwear was gone just as fast, and soon Hyoyeon found herself licking the insides of her skinny thighs, looking at Amber stopping herself from screaming, begging her to stop teasing, and Hyoyeon felt in control.
    'Say please' was all she said
    'please. //Please//.' Amber heaved in between audibly loud breaths. Hyoyeon liked it.


    okay I'm sorry this isn't even turning me on. Fuck shit fuck how disgusting.

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  21. Oh, this is all so gross.

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