Wednesday, May 9, 2012

I talk Hyorin because I have nothing better to talk about...



  


So I've really been into the song Alone by Sistar recently. I could blast dat shit out my car window all day errr day and not give a fuck who was watching me. The last time a song made me want to blast shit out my window, I was playing Pinocchio by F(x) and every time Krystal/Sulli sang I got a huge boner. To my joy, it wouldn't go away, so I had to stop at my local Jack N' the box parking lot and take care of business. As I went to the drive through (before my fap session), I ordered a Jumbo Jack with Cheese, a 7 piece stuffed Jalapeno, and a Large Diet Coke (LOL). The fatty that worked at the Drive-Thru asked what I was listening to, I said F(X). She said, "no shit asshole, I know it's sound effects." I said, "It's a korean group, bitch just give me my curly fries."  She noticed, then, that I had a huge BONE...like it was moving back and forth and she smiled. Honestly she was cute for a fatty! I'd smell her butthole if she wanted.  Yup, she's that cute.

(disclaimer: fat chicks have very very smelly buttholes, so please be aware that if you smell a fat girl's butthole you will smell yesterday's cheeseburger).

So, I went to the parking lot and began to fap to F(x) and a little to the fatty at the drive-thru. However, some mother with her two kids interrupted me. They walked by,  so I had to put it away...it was a sad moment. Plus, I only fap to koreans...they weren't korean.
..........
So let's talk Hyorin for a second. Hyorin is fucking ugly. Yes, you heard me. Bitch looks like someone ran her face over with a lawn mower, urinated on it, and then set fire to it. After they set fire to it they picked up what was left of her face and put it on the body of a really hot woman. There is honestly no other woman in kpop I can say is a butterface (other than PARK BOM) like Hyorin. I mean, look at Bora, she is soooooo damn sexy. Those legs! Those buttcheeks! That hair! That FACE! That BODY! Bora is perfection in my book. I swear I would sniff Bora's butthole after a bowl of Pho/CHINESE BUFFET!  Hyorin, on the other hand, looks like well...like my bowel movement after a bad case of Mexican food...I'm talkin' enchildas, carne asada, and horchata. Imagine all that coming out of your "balloon knot," feeling up your bowl, swirling around---that's Hyorin I know some of you Hyorin stans are going to get pissed, but I could care less honestly. Shits ugly yo! Take the pic on the top for example, She's trying to be all Kawaii and shit. The only thing she accomplishes with that look is making my penis invert back into my pelvis. SHIT'S NOT CUTE! BLAH

rahahahaaahah LOL

THIS IS REAL PERFECTION


EWWWWW GTFO WITH THIS SHIT....LOOKS LIKE A DRUNKEN BEAVER

30 comments:

  1. Ummmmmmm........No comment. *_*

    Actually....what the HELL did I just read!?!?! Mind rape, I wanna take it back!!!

    ReplyDelete
  2. don't worry, i got mind raped too, now to go find a fat chick that looks cute.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. not lying. Cute fat girls are where it's at. Just not WHALE FAT. Cause you'd break you clavicle.

      Delete
  3. I've always thought she was a butterface as well. But don't forget G-na.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. oh...yeah. I did. Yeah, she is a total butterface. But as for butterfaces: Hyorin > G.NA >Bom

      Delete
  4. Reminds me of the time me and friend got drunk and were fapping together (no homo) and he was like, "yo nigga let's get some fuckin taco bell i hear they have hyomin in some fuckin dorito shells!" so we get there and the line is 2 hours long because everyone got drunk and was orderin hyomin in the dorito shell. we gets to the order box and the dudes like "sorry mang we outta hyomin but we gots plenty of soyou left". fuck that shit. i was fucking pissed and i went inside and took a giant shit on the counter and started kicking over cash registers. a couple workers tried to tackle me but they were overpowered by the smell of my shit. then the police came and told me to come down from the counter but i blasted some shit in their faces. then they all tackled me and while 2 two were holding my arms a couple more were tazing and macing me while another was punching me in the stomach, making even more shit come out. eventually i had to spend 3 days in jail and do 72 hours of community service.

    i guess the morale of the story is don't get drunk and look at hyomin

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. dats hyorin lol (hyomin in the loco taco would own too though)

      Delete
    2. damn all these feels bec of soyu. my heart breaks for my bb </3

      Delete
  5. sulli_fag is now an author?

    this should be interesting..

    ReplyDelete
  6. This comment has been removed by the author.

    ReplyDelete
  7. Shit now this looks worse..... WELCOME TO THE BLOG!

    ReplyDelete
  8. Welcome to AKF. Also, I took the liberty of replacing that truly shitteous Bora gif for you.

    You're all welcome, faggots. Fap away.

    http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-CZWWwHGZJtQ/T6uQNHSKBdI/AAAAAAAAAek/ikaefu-t9Fc/s1600/Ma-Boy.gif

    ReplyDelete
  9. Wait..I didn't click on WEZ ASIAN BEZNOTCHES...
    #welcome sulli_fag
    #comebackdavidfresh2012cumbag
    #faphyorinhawtfap

    ReplyDelete
  10. LMAO you're going to be an interesting author to read.

    ReplyDelete
  11. 1 year ago - Hyorin is ugly as shit
    Now - omg Hyorin unnir is soooooo pretty

    Bitch no.

    Great article btw.

    ReplyDelete
  12. hue
    hue
    hueheuehueheueehueeheuehueheuhe

    Apink article please. preferably with many naeun pic/gifs

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. You need to stage a comeback soon and show all these upstarts how it's done. Zaku is busy taking a leaf or two out of the 2NE1 playbook with the flashy .gifs while this sulli_fag newbie is trying to channel 4minute by smashing dick on keyboard and posting results.

      But you have the icon of the One True Horse, so the Power of Nine is with you. Do it!

      Delete
  13. This article was like, a mindfuck. But then I noticed who the author was.

    ReplyDelete
  14. Wonderful article; very nuanced. I specifically enjoyed the intricate wordplay and the evocative images the author articulated, nay, painted with their prose. The meticulous diction in particular was veritable honey for the cognitive process.

    ReplyDelete
  15. Pretty sure I saw this article somewhere else

    oh

    fuck

    ReplyDelete
  16. i think this blogger r the ugliest.. poor ur mother bcos having a son who only grow up to spread hate.. who the hell care with her appearance.. for me, she's very beautiful and the most important is her talent.. i love the way she is.. she's the most talented singer and dancer..
    #ps: there's no human is perfect including u and me,.

    ReplyDelete
  17. i think this blogger r the ugliest.. poor ur mother bcos having a son who only grow up to spread hate.. who the hell care with her appearance.. for me, she's very beautiful and the most important is her talent.. i love the way she is.. she's the most talented singer and dancer..
    #ps: there's no human is perfect including u and me,.

    ReplyDelete