Wednesday, April 2, 2014

Hyo emulates her inner Xena: cuts a Bitch, arrested, AMAZONIAN 4 LYFE SIS!

She's comin' for you!
WARNING: THIS IS NOT AN APRIL'S FOOL JOKE; HYOYEON HAS EMBRACED THE LIFE OF A WARRIOR PRINCESS!

Soompi recently confirmed that the rumours about one of the members of the Divine Nine being arrested are, in fact, true and are about Hyoyeon herself (as confirmed by SM).



Basically, Hyoyeon got herself sloshed - like a true Amazonian - and decided to play some rather questionable games. She ran up to a balcony and tried to throw herself off, whilst play fighting with her "friend" that tried to stop her, but ended up getting poked in the eye. Hyoyeon's sissy friend called the police and Hyo ended up paying a visit to the slammer.

What a puss puss friend. I would be in jail for the amount of times I've whacked/smacked/slapped/kicked/punched/strangled my friends if they were all a bunch of pussy satyrs like Hyoyeon's "friend" here. I mean what kind of a friend does that because their turnt friend got a little too hammered and poked them in the eyeball? Not to mention that this guy was a man and it wasn't like she poked him in the dick!

Damn fool. I just hope Hyoyeon rips him a new one once the international undeground k-pop fandom calm their tits over this minor incident which some people are trying to turn into a T-ara "bullying" incident 2.0.

 A strange rumour about this whole incident circulated the world wide k-pop web of lies, last night and goes something like this:

“My friend’s sister’s friend’s dad is a police officer, and yesterday (May 30), Hyoyeon tried to commit suicide because she’s bullied by Girls’ Generation, and when some guy saw what was happening and tried to stop her, she said she was just going to kill herself and hit the guy. They went to the police station, and it was a huge mess!!!”
Yeah lol, the moment you see "my friend's sister's friend's dad" in the same sentence that tries to tell us that Hyoyeon wants to kill herself because she's being bullied, you know someone's spreading a big fat whopper like butter on toast.

...But there are actually Netizens that believe in this lie.

8. [+97, -13] SM's story doesn't make sense. Hyoyeon's being bullied in SNSD and she tried to commit suicide by jumping off the second floor before getting caught by her boyfriend. Netizens know this rumor... how can SM think they can cover it up as just an incident?
10. [+82, -13] So was that rumor, right? That she tried to commit suicide because she's being bullied? Then this is worse than T-ara
YES! It is a rumour! A very bad one to say the least, but the Netz are acting like they never got all turnt up after glugging down some Soju and then tried to play a very dangerous game. I've never been able to understand how some people are just so damn gullible. Of course something sounds "fishy" and "wrong" when it's been pulled straight out of somebody's arse and lacks any credibility.

This is why SM shouldn't have clarified anything because it only got the rumour mill all worked up. For a country that produces the second highest exam results in the world, they sure are stupid.

Now SM are planning on suing those who have been spreading the malicious rumours about not only Hyoyeon, but Taeyeon too (some people have been spreading rumours that Hyoyeon is covering for Taeyeon). I really don't want to see this turn into one huge scandal because what happened with T-ara was bad enough, and I'm sure nobody wants a repeat of the same vapid comments that happened during T-ara's fake bullying scandal.

We may never know what really happened, but if there's one thing we've all learnt* it's that Hyoyeon is not one to be messed with and she will whack your ass up like a true Amazonia sistah if you dare touch her turnt weave! Bow down bitches!

Imma cut you.
*On a more serious note, I think I should inform all of you that jumping off of balconies whilst drunk or sober is never a good idea and can result in paralysis or death. Please do not attempt to jump off of a balcony/staircase for "fun".

33 comments:

  1. Sherlock SHINee need to stop looking for Jessica's ghost and figure out what really happened here.

    Also, where is a gif. of Hyo slapping that dude in IGAB when you need one?

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  2. She wasn't arrested though? Wasn't it just a police report?

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    1. Arrested without charge, she got taken down town.

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  3. I have a really hard time believing that Hyoyeon gets bullied by the other members, she never seemed like somebody that is ok with having to put up with shit from others. In shows and interviews (bla bla everything is scripted, whatever) she seemed to have a fast-firing mouth that always talks back.

    However, if she gets thrown out of SNSD for whatever reason, that might mean no more retarded and useless dance breaks in songs and MVs. Which would be a very good thing.

    Also, what "Taeyeon cover-up" ?

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    1. According to netizens, Taeyeon is really depressed/suicidal and it was her that was involved. Apparently SM are covering it up and saying it was Hyo

      (PS, the recent SNSD and SuJu MV dance breaks were pretty kewl)

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    2. Hm, I'm not sure what to think of that...

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    3. Probably Hyoyeon is having a hard time herself... 'Cause she said in Healing Camp that she had nothing to do last year after IGAB promotion, unlike her fellow members. And the Yuri said she herself cried to herself as she had a thought of SNSD disbanding... Found it slightly fishy there. If SNSD is to be disbanded, Hyoyeon virtually will have no job in this cruel industry.
      Now being called as a OGRE all the time :P and the fact that she is one of the least liked members, I wouldn't be surprised to see if she had emotional breakdowns at times.
      This is just my two pence though, feel free to bash on.

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    4. I think Hyoyeon could easily survive in a dance or rap or something like that group.

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    5. ^I don't think it is really as bad as that.

      In Healing Camp she mentioned the skiing tournament and how the past year she has been embracing new hobbies and meeting new people

      When SNSD disband, she can easily become a dance tutor - considering she is known as one of the best dancers in Kpop

      She has a boyfriend and still gets modelling jobs from time to time - IMO that says a lot more about her looks than what random internet users say about her.
      It's acknowledged that she is the most popular member overseas as well

      The fact that her "friend" went to the police after an accidental hit is really fishy though.

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    6. Hyoyeon is the most popular in the least important markets SNSD. Yoona still shits all over everyone on Japan, and I think Jessica is the most popular in China. Sure, the 25 white fans in America may prefer Hyoyeon, but so what?

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    7. "It's acknowledged that she is the most popular member overseas as well" - Not if we go by every western poll I've ever come across. lol
      http://maciejcorvo.hubpages.com/hub/The-Most-Popular-SNSD-Member-Ranking (the important part is the poll at the bottom)
      http://www.quibblo.com/quiz/dArlOKn/Which-SNSD-member-is-your-favorite
      http://poll.pollcode.com/t5n2_result?v
      And you can probably find countless other polls where she's only in the middle or lower third.

      She does seem to be more popular in the west than in the east, though. Same goes for Sunny.

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    8. Yeah I should have worded that better - my point being that she still has a lot of fans, etc and that these rumours about suicide are weird/stupid/trollish considering she has a lot going for her.

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    9. But then Sunny has lots of fans in Taiwan, which is a rather big market for SNSD obviously as there was a repackaged THE BOYS album exclusively for the Taiwan market.
      Although you may find me being disillutional, I reckon it is possible that Hyoyeon might have tried committing suicide back then. This is just my bullcrap + 2 pence from a 16-yo school boy who thought him know them well enough simply becoz he watch fancam all the day. :P

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    10. Around the same day that she "attempted suicide", SNSD had the "Mr Mr Real Moment Replay" gig/fan-signing. Check the pictures and she is happy/smiling and having a good time.

      Even with acting, it is impossible to go suicidal to completely normal within the space of a few hours.

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    11. Actually that isn't true. People suffering from depression or suicidal thoughts are sometimes very, very good at putting on a facade and fitting in. You don't see people who are actually depressed going around making drama or a big deal about how miserable they are. The thought process often goes "Well I don't want to burden the people around me or cause a big fuss with my personal drama so I'll just keep it quiet."

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    12. Very true, CombatBaby. It seems to me (I recently went through a lot of depression/suicide issues) that nobody could suspect anything about me after several cuts and a few layers of makeup. Just because someone smiles brightly in front of others does not mean that s/he does the same alone.

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    13. Combatbaby you hit the nail on the head, you're 100% right.

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    14. "It's acknowledged that she is the most popular member overseas as well"

      It's amazing people still believe this. It's based on one time, quite a while ago, SMTOWN was in France I think and that particular crowd cheered louder for her. A couple of the other members acknowledged this fluke in an interview, probably out of pity.

      Idk how one crowd in one European country cheering for her = the entire western world thinks she's the hottest member of the group, but OK. Keep up with that delusion it if helps you get through your day.

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    15. ^Actually if was based on several variety shows/interviews and a few news articles I read.

      And like I said, I should have worded it better.

      Also, if you are saying that they acknowledged this "fluke" out of pity - that seems pretty delusional to me and therefore pretty hypocritical.
      Just something to consider next time you are on that high horse of yours.

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  4. Odds are Hyoyeon got drunk and hit him because she actually does that.

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  5. Hyo's brows look aggressive, guess they say a lot about her in general

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    1. You should go into astrology. lol

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  6. How is her nose that flat. You could land a plane on that.

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  7. At least we still have Sulli's baby shower to look forward to.

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  8. You'd think that if she was bullied, SNSD would avoid bullying her since she beat the crap out this guy.

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  9. Plot twist: Hyoyeon assaulted a man to end the dreaded patriarchy. Bow down to the Feminist Queen, motherfuckers.

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  10. Is this gonna become an SNSD blog?? I came here escaping from crazy sones and now the writer looks like one. Ohhhhh god!!!

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    Replies
    1. *Gasps* How did you know?!

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    2. I had a hunch!! Sorry didn't mean to offend. Is just that I really like this blog because I like kpop , but i really dislike delusional fangirls.

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    3. I'm not a fangirl lol. I can't tell if you're joking or not, but my post is meant to be funny.

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    4. I was joking on the fangirl thing sorry my joke wasn't funny at all, i'm not a very funny person.

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    5. Grats this is the funniest thing I've read in a while. ;)

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