Friday, January 27, 2012

[MV Review] Six Bomb - Chicky Chicky Boom

New girl group debut =  fresh blood in the fap market. But are they fappable enough for your right hands to stan religiously? Full review after the jump.

The music video takes shitty dancing-in-a-box to a whole new level, (dare I say it) daring to think outside of the box. In fact, Six Bomb kicks the whole damn box down, shamelessly forgoing multiple fancy sets in favor of a lovely green screen. Strangely enough, nothing is ever done with the green screen other than to flash different colors in your face like the seizure-Porygon episode of Pokemon and to create blocky name platforms floating in inky blackness for the members to stand on. 

Even more strangely enough, the members themselves are all in black and white. Perhaps their company realizes the masking power of black and white (or sepia for that matter) to hide the fug of their members. Only Subin and perhaps one other member are rescuable from the proverbial Scrappy Heap.

The dance was pretty shitty, but some of the outfits were surprisingly nice.

The one thing that potential fans might appreciate though is the fact that Six Bomb's company took the time to introduce each member by putting a romanized name to an actual face.

Jee thanks, Jang Ent.

The song itself is utter shit, and the random guest rapper featuring on the track does nothing (and I mean nothing) for this song. (Does anyone even know who the fuck that guy is?) Chicka Chicka Boom is generically generic, following the tried-and-true KPop formulaic hook song + rap section squeezed in at the end. The group's rapper (Hyejin I suppose her name is) deserves a mention not because of some astounding talent, but because she manages to combine all the worst attributes of Dara and fuses them Bekah's body. I shit you not. This unfortunate bitch has the horrendous haircut, overly autotuned voice, and awkward man body (of early Bekah to be fair) of the two of them.

The whole thing would be an utter shit show if it weren't for some tactically placed cleavage in the beginning of the MV.

2 for 1 gif special. Blink and you'll miss Subin though.

Sadly, there's no more such money shots in the MV. I would know, I scoured through the whole MV thrice trying to find some hint of sexy sex appeal to gif. Damn those clever bastards using cleavage to keep people watching/rewatching.

Anyways TL;DR:

MV was dance-in-front-of-a-green-screen, song was worse shit than a leper's diarrhea. Six Bomb? Moar liek Six Bombed.

I give it a 1.5/5 (originally a 1/5, but added a 0.5 for the cleavage.)


  1. ^no you.
    Too tired to make a rational comment so I'll come back tomorrow ut thanks for the cleavage shot gif


  3. Zaku is my favorite author, their reviews are awesome. Sorry David but you have been replaced.

  4. this song isn't even generic, it's just bad
    also the guy rapper is HIDEOUS wtf who let him in front of a camera

  5. This is low budget Kpop, i feel bad for them, they never had a chance.

  6. oh dear god someone cover my eyes

  7. Look at her boobs jiggle lol

  8. My. Ears..... i couldn't even finish watching/hearing that shitload... -_- one more chorus of "chicky chicky boom!" Repeatedly, and my ears would of exploaded. Also, I'm not the type to call kpop idols fat, but look at the thumbnail.... that chick has big thighs, or atleast needs bigger fishnets.

  9. Am I the only one who spent the whole time looking to see where the sixth member was? They should be proscuted under the Trades Description Act.

    Also, anyone who thinks this is the worst clearly doesn't remember Girl2school.