Tuesday, February 4, 2014

[MV Review] Rainbow Blaxx - Cha Cha

Really late review, BUT I FINISHED EVENTUALLY (FUCK YOU CHUCK)



Rainbow Blaxx raised a lot of... expectation with all of their semi-pornlike teasers, especially considering their concept. Take the 4 hottest members of Rainbow, stick them in a sub unit, put them in lacy frilly clothes/lingerie + push up bras, surround them in food and you've got yourself a visually stunning affair that only needs a decent song to push it into the stratosphere.

Then again, when you get Jaekyung's gorgeous self reclining with her legs
in full display... Not much else you can ask for.
Unfortunately, the song isn't that great. More on that later, let's just focus on the visuals right now (since that's what everyone's here for anyway...)

The MV follows a rather sinister plotline, or rather a snapshot of the metaphorical exploitation of idol life experienced by Rainbow Blaxx (and by proxy, everyone else in the biz). You see, the members of Rainbow Blaxx are fed sweets and other treats throughout the MV. This symbolizes the image that idols are expected to portray, a seemingly idyllic life where everyone thinks they just get to eat/drink whatever they want based on the Instagram updates or Tweets they send out on the daily. 

I don't know why it's macaroons in particular, but why not.
Sexy eating action close-ups make enough sense to your penis/vagina.
However, all is not truly as it seems!! The girls are actually enslaved by a creepy lesbian madame who is actually feeding them all this shit in order to get them to produce gems. Clearly we have found ourselves in some bizarro world where hot girls eat macaroons and spit out gems as if they can crush the carbon atoms of their food into diamonds in their stomachs. It's all a metaphor for idol life of course. Managers/CEOs/etc force these girls to eat/do random shit (often against their wills) and then reap the rewards of their effort.

It's all cleverly disguised through the erotic eating shots, BUT I SEE RIGHT THROUGH THEM.
Of course, you can't expect to eat all that cake and macaroons and delicious sweets without packing on the pounds right quick, so that's where the creepy lesbian madame comes in.

She has to make sure the fat is going to the right places, if you know what I mean.
Hyunyoung looks decidedly nervous/terrified. I think my interpretation is correct.
As you can see, these girls are nothing more than sex(y?) slaves and livestock to this lady, just like idols are to their respective companies. 

Of course, you can always just ignore all the contrived social commentary and just swim in the imagery.

If I wasn't afraid of getting this site locked down by Google again, I'd
photoshop a penis in there for all you sickos.
There's also some sexy dance moves in there for flavor, but there's nothing particularly wow-worthy in my opinion. It's all very basic moves, but that could be just me holding performance groups to a higher standard. It'll get the job done if all you want is random sexy shots of sexy girls doing sexy things. Still don't see the need for backup dancers here, 4 girls is a perfectly fine number of people for a stage.

ZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZ...
I suppose this is interesting enough... Meh.
Which brings us to the song itself. My initial reaction was pretty good, I sort of liked the tune as a retro-ey swing-ey throwback but it doesn't hold up very well to repeated listens. I think the verses + bridge lacked punch, especially considering how decently it was all set up in the intro. The chorus is pretty good though. I think what killed it was the presence of idol rap and a really forced hook (the "Sirseumnida, joseumnida, mareul jom haebwa / Issseumnikka, eobsseumnikka, naege ol mami / Huhoehaji anheul jasin innayo uh~ uh~" bits). I was getting used to passable or even non-existent rap bridges until now... (I'm still ignoring Hyomin's I'M ADDICT bullshit, that doesn't exist to me.)

Let's just put the MV on mute or something, IDK.
TL;DR:
Come for the erotic eating MV, not the commentary or the song. TASTE THE RAINBOW

+:
  • erotic eating
  • jjangbak outfits
    • RAINBOW BLAXX IS STACKED (Or maybe they just have excellent bra support)
  • the concept of Rainbow Blaxx as the distilled hotness of Rainbow
  • the bridge of the song is decent
  • social commentary on idol life?!
-:
  • the song is boring
  • stupid hook
  • meh rap
  • that madame is creepy, and that dwarf
  • why can't we have Jaekyung as the lesbian madame and let her prey on the rest of Rainbow Blaxx???
I give this song a 2.75 out of 5. Just watch the MV.

20 comments:

  1. I take back my previous statement. THANK YOU.

    ReplyDelete
  2. http://www.jenniferbraceras.com/blog/wp-content/uploads/2012/09/photo.jpg

    *You didn't write that review (if it weren't for me loling at you for making my prediction come true)

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. IT WAS DONE COINCIDENTALLY AT THE SAME TIME AS THAT TWEET

      Delete
  3. "4 hottest members of Rainbow" - More like "three hottest members and some unknown nugu".

    High expectations, mediocre rewards, but Hyunyoung is still very hot.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. There's also this video on this somewhat weird stage:
      https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SIBZAp5zXuU
      I find the "showcase" part really unusual. It's like they bang some manager dicks afterwards...

      Delete
    2. yea , who is that 4th girl who isnt really pretty..Woorie, Jaekyung and Hyunyoung are the only ones worth looking for in Rainbow

      Delete
  4. I actually really like the song... My reaction to it was lukewarm at first, but I've had it on repeat for the last two weeks. In terms of the dance, the live performances show how good it actually is; it's all very burlesque themed and done quite well (IMO of course).

    ReplyDelete
  5. I think if they add Jisook to Rainbow Blaxx they should just drop whoever else is supposed to be in Rainbow and just call this Rainbow. Or trade Seungah for Jisook at there we go. It sucks cause Rainbow has some pretty decent MVs but the idol world is so saturated right now they hardly stand out. I actually don't mind this song and I'm really rooting for Rainbow to somehow become something.

    After A, they should've went on a T-ara style media/promotion blitz but I guess DSP was scared to do something like that after the whole KARA contract dispute.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. They need to kick out Noeul and Yoonhye, and replace them with the two chicks who just dropped put of 9MUSES. This won't help the group at all. It WILL however give me something to look at and other than actual music, that's the only thing I care about.

      Delete
  6. I loved this song a lot actually. However I didn't think about that part about it relating to idol life! Really cool analogy.

    Shit.
    I'm under my new account.
    Oh well too late to turn back now.
    Does anybody really care lol?
    Whatever. Good review Zaku.

    ReplyDelete
  7. Your insight about the plot is scary. God damn it now I can totally see it.

    ReplyDelete
  8. @ Anti Kpop-Fangirl, I've been eagerly awaiting your review of "Shh" by After School.

    ReplyDelete
  9. fuck that food looks so yummy

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  10. Rainbow with another half assed song? Moving on

    ReplyDelete
  11. "why can't we have Jaekyung as the lesbian madame and let her prey on the rest of Rainbow Blaxx???"

    I LOVE YOU ZAKU.

    ReplyDelete
  12. Please REVIEW SPICA's COMEBACK song "YOU DONT LOVE ME"

    The Music Video-- http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=99-Eit4a3-0

    AND PLZ COMMENT ON THIS-->
    http://www.asianjunkie.com/wp-content/uploads/2014/01/spica-jiwon-you-dont-love-me.gif

    ReplyDelete
  13. Hello, would you be able to review KISS&CRY's debut song, Domino Game? I know the MV has shitty production but it'd still be nice to see a review for it. If not, that's all okay. Always a frequent visitor to your blog, have been for a long time but I've only started commenting recently.

    ReplyDelete
  14. This comment has been removed by the author.

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  15. Or you could review the absolute mess that is GOT7's debut song. (can we even call it a song?)

    ReplyDelete