Monday, January 27, 2014

Soshi manager Chapter 5: Little slices of meat

After we got back from Vietnam I had only brief respite before I was at it again. This time I had to help with the opening of our new clothes line, SPAO.

I figured I would begin my search for this document in the company restaurant. Why would a missing file be in the company restaurant? Well it shouldn't be but if anything I've learned some shit around here just don't make sense. I gave up questioning it a long time ago. That isn't even addressing the point that now Onew wanted me to find a thing that I wasn't even asked about yet. Well I guess Jonghyun was going to ask me to return his missing book anyway so I might as well listen to what he has to say:

Ah. So... A book with pages... And is blue. Thanks, that really narrows it down.

You bet. I'll keep my eyes open for a blue book. ~

Can you believe this shit? Since when did Mr Kim's office becoming a book depository? There are at least 10 blue books in here. Which fucking one is it? I decided I'd just take them all and punch Onew in the face next time I saw him.

I headed to the academy next where Miss Song gave some helpful advice. "Do what people tell you to do". Again, such a huge help. Is that not what I've been doing every day since I got here. I was beginning to worry how cynical this job was making me.

As I was lugging around a dufflebag of blue books I wandered into the gym to see if Jonghyun was there and instead ran into Donghae. I didn't really care for his tone. Since when had I ever messed up their menu. I told him to worry about his own caloric intake and to basically fuck off. I'm not getting paid to put up with Suju's shit.

For some reason Jonghyun was in the changing room. I threw my dufflebag to the ground and several blue books fell out. He looked at me confused for a moment before meekly picking one up. At this point I was anticipating a "talking to" from Mr. Kim but I figured it'd be a little difficult to conduct any business in his office now that it was moonlighting as a library.

Next up was Sunny with another classic SNSD game of skill.

Yup... That's me... Guiding a little character through a maze... While dodging Cheetos. Thus is the life of a Soshi Manager.

At least by now I was exceptionally good at it. I was eagerly looking forward to being their game buddy. ;)

Y...You too. I might've said something about asking her if she'd put my cartridge in her slot... No wait, I didn't do that. I meant to. :(

I figured while I was here I might as well check out the practice room. Sooyoung was all alone. I just said OK and left.

I had been just about everywhere in the academy so I though I'd next check out the girls' dorm. After looking high and low and through many a drawer of panties (gotta take advantage of those perks) I thought I'd check back in the academy and sure enough it was in the cafeteria.

I brought it back straight back to her.

I was pretty confident I had helped everyone who needed it and decided to attend the SPAO event after finding that document from earlier in the day. (Guess where it was, no don't, it was in Mr. Kim's "library")

As I watched the girls I thought completely professional thoughts... Yes, completely professional thoughts.

Nothing to see here folks. Just a professional at work.


After the successful debut of the new clothing line I ate the girls out took the girls out to eat.

The words of Donghae ran through my mind like I was being haunted by a ghost. "Little sliced meat" I heard. I knew at that moment I must order them bulgogi. Apparently it worked out.

Yuri put her foot down.

After that it was a rather quiet night, thankfully. I drowned my sorrows in the bottle and wondered how much more of a hateful misanthrope I would become in coming weeks.


  1. I'm expecting a Soylent Green/Delicatessen style plot twist...

  2. I'd like to say I wouldn't have gone through their drawers if I was in the position to.

    But let's not lie to ourselves.

  3. I Love that picture of Sunny they keep using.

  4. This would be better if the "developers" didn't have to throw in Suju and Shinee members in there all the time. How is the manager supposed to bang the SNSD members if those guys keep cockblocking you?

    1. I was thinking the same thing. No way you're getting with any of them with these gits lounging around. Thankfully, this was probably made before the existence of Exo.