This week's photo comes from an anonymous asker on my Ask.fm:
Thank you for your submission!
Okay. There is a lot to discuss here
1) Are you sexually attracted to flashlights now, too? I only ask because when I was still studying psychology, we learned about people who orgasm whilst in an environment which then inadvertently encodes in their memory. In turn, they become accidentally sexually attracted to certain objects (that were present) which now begin to prompt their sexual arousal. Damn. Must be awkward for you when you suddenly get horny in hardware stores now.
2) Do you let other people in your house still use that flashlight? You
better not. Because that would be fucked up for a parent to have to use a
flashlight that was inside their daughter during a blackout. I would
honestly rather just sit in the dark than have to touch that.
3) You better have washed your hands right after doing that, young lady. I wouldn't want to be that unlucky victim who had to touch your sticky and smelly keyboard shortly after.
4) Doesn't it feel kind of strange? I mean, like, the textures are all wrong... A hard flashlight and then suddenly a soft (non human shaped) pillow? Isn't it... uncomfortable? Wait. I probably do not want to be curious about this. Do not answer me if you see this.
5) Has anyone seen this pillow of yours? Because if I went over to a friend's house and saw that her body pillow of a boy had his crotch ripped out, I would be very concerned. In fact, you couldn't even talk yourself out of that. No excuse could save your innocence. Anyone would know exactly what you were doing with it. Filthy.
6) Don't you feel hurt that he doesn't kiss back? That means you aren't making love - it is just meaningless sex. That is not romantic =(
I don't know why this concerns me so much. Like, why did you have to confess this?!
If anyone has submissions for future Stupid Things Fangirls Utter,
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