Tuesday, March 4, 2014

[MV Review] 2NE1 - Don't Come Back Home Ever Again, 2NE1



Well Teddy, the trend of throwing 3-5 songs into one song passed already. I know you were busy fucking Han Ye Seul, but come on man, you're usually not a whole 14 months late on trends in Kpop, especially such shitty trends as mashing multiple incomplete songs into one and calling it a day.

I tried my best to avoid this comeback since, well, I haven't liked anything 2NE1 has released since Hate You. That means they have released a loooot of songs since then that I thought were absolute shit, with the biggest offenders being CL's solo songs. However, I know everyone enjoys my misery, so I'm taking one for the team and reviewing this piece of shit.



The major gripe I have about this song is that it is a disjointed, schizophrenic piece of shit. The song starts off with a slow beat with nothing interesting happening in the instrumentals, having CL's nasal voice carrying the song. Things pick up for the chorus, until a trap beat comes out of left field and Dara starts begging for someone to cum on her before a boring-as-fucking-shit acoustic instrumental replaces the trap beat. All of this happens in the first 1:30 of the song, before the formula repeats itself for the rest of the song. I guess I have to give it points for having some sort of structure unlike SNSD's I Got Multiple Personality Disorder, but that's like saying a shit castle is better than a pile of shit. In the end, they're both massive clumps of stinking-ass shit that should be banished from this dimension, never to be heard from again.

I'm trying to find some positives from the song....I guess the fact that Bom doesn't vocally masturbate in this song like she usually does? She is a terrible vocalist and to hear her straining when she sings sounds like she's trying to sing out of her vagina through the power of queefing. However, that just means more CL...so in the end, nobody wins.

I know a lot of Blackjacks tried to find some special meanings in the MV, but to be honest, I couldn't pay attention to what happened in the MV despite watching it three times. I was just laughing at Bom trying to make any facial movements? Does that make me an asshole? Yes. But Bom brought it upon herself, as she's hysterical to the point that she should have her own section on SNL Korea.

In the end, 2NE1 has shown time and time again that their time has passed. They're lucky that they have a fanbase rabid enough to keep supporting them even if Yang Hyun Suk has no intentions to do so. It's sad to say that 2NE1 has fallen even harder than SNSD. Sure, SNSD has released two of the vilest turds in the history of Kpop, but 2NE1 has released so many turds in a row that it could constitute as diarrhea.

At the very least Dara gave the song a hook worth remembering.


46 comments:

  1. lol.
    I like the song. In fact I like it more than "Mr.Mr."(even though I liked that as well.)

    I'm a fan of bizarre, heavy, strange, electronic(?) sounding music which is probably why F(x) is my favorite girl group (with 2ne1 being number 2.)

    However, I can understand why some just don't like it. And I'm not one to force my opinions on someone so those who like it, like it. And those who don't, don't. An opinion is an opinion. But I've come to find it that a lot of BlackJacks and SONEs just won't get that.

    That pic of Dara is funny. Gives the chorus a whole new meaning to me XD

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    1. I hate all songs that are just several songs mashed into one. It's not cool and the trend really needs to die.

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    2. I get IGAB or I Got a Multiple Personality Disorder was… less than stellar. But I like this song. It sounds more put together. I'm not saying every song needs multiple songs mashed together. A song can be bizarre and strange and at the same time great without all of that "Rap NO! You must sing! BREAKDOWN! now sing NOW rap, what is this? Hip hop??? Pop??? Shit??? Oh whatever let's just call it a song." Confusion going on lmao.
      If all songs were like that, then my face would have a constant "wtf???" look on it.

      I dunno, it's just my opinion.

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    3. You're not dead boss?????

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  2. Now you guys are just being hipsters for hating on YG. Seriously does AKF hate everything from YG? Maybe kpopkalypse oppar should make an article reflecting the decline and fall of YG

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    1. I couldn't be bothered. Why kick a blind, bleeding three-legged horse with diarrhoea in the balls, seems more humane to let it bleed out... and collect the blood to use in a nice thickshake later on.

      I'm pretty sure we all publicly liked Seungri's comebacks though so the "we're just hating on YG to be hipsters" theory doesn't really stack up against the evidence.

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    2. Kpopalypse and I were just talking on Twitter about how much we liked Hate You.

      Sorry that Teddy has his head between Han Ye Seul's legs and doesn't have any fucks to give when it comes to composing a coherent song. If disliking shit songs makes me a hipster, so be it.

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    3. I can't speak for the other authors, but I don't base my liking of a group on its company. Either the group has songs I like or it doesn't. I overall like 2ne1. That's why it annoys me so much that they've released, what, four stinkers in a row now? Ugh. I'm a lot harder on the things I care for.

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  3. Rule 34 request: Dara on "bukkake news".

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    1. What is bukkake???? Like seriously I don't know!!!!

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    2. It's when a bunch of dude's jizz on a girl's face. The Japanese started it because it was a way to get past all of the censors since they don't censor jizz.

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    3. Instead of news stories to read out she could have a bunch of 2NE1 lyrics sheets.

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    4. Ohhh. It all makes sense now lol

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  5. Ok, IGAB is one of the worst songs by SNSD, is The boys the other one?

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    Replies
    1. I'm happy now, like, I hate this song, sounds so fucking bad, but everyone I know like it DD:

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  6. The acoustic part only shows up once and that's because there are two versions of Come Back Home (the normal one and the acoustic one). There's actually another video for the latter, which will continue with this story.

    I really don't understan this but I loved the trap breakdown. Am I a dumb blackjack? No. Do I like electronic drops a la dubstep in my kpop? Not at all. Why did I fall in love with the breakdown, then? Maaybe because it's trap instead of dubstep, maybe because of Dara, maybe because the beat is tight as fuck. I don't know, dude, it's just my favourite part.

    I loved the lack of Bom but CL got in my face too much (she's even the one I like the most). I do like CL's voice but I could have used some more Minzy.

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    1. I had no idea there was an acoustic version as I have no aspirations to rape my ears by listening to 2NE1's album.

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    2. The unplugged version is the best song in this album. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gLEInVPziUA

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    3. Come back home unplugged version is the one that i like of all the songs they released now, i have no idea why they chose the edited piece of shit come back home with the infamous, 'come baby, come come come baby." Goodness it shrugs me.

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  7. This song needed more Minzy to try and save it from sounding as awful as it did.
    #FreeMinzy

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    1. Minzy probably likes having few lines because no one can ever fault her for being the reason why a song sucks ass.

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  8. Also, CL's voice sounds, to me, more raspy than nasal. AKF, why do you say her voice is nasal, wtf? akisame should clear it up.

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    Replies
    1. Because, to me, it sounds like she has a nasally, grating voice.

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    2. Akisame can't clear it, CL is nasal as fuck (I'm a vocal fag of OH)

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    3. Either way CL's voice is grating and irritating to the point that I even like Dara's thin voice better.

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  10. I have to say, I liked some parts of the song, the beginning part was borderline crap, but it's still acceptable, I liked the song from 0:43 - 0:55. Chorus is crap, and some fucking car noise is introduced after that.

    Also this video needs to be banned because they don't wear the proper protective equipments when doing experiments. Where's your lab coats and safety glasses girls, it's funny until your hand melts because of some acid shit.

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  11. I'm getting a bit tired of CL's nasally rap to be honest. I'm appreciating Minzy and her vocals a lot more, and starting to think that she's the real talent out of the four. Again, I found this song as disappointing as the stuff they put out in 2013. Not a 2NE1 hater. Their pre 2011 stuff are some of my favorite songs in Kpop. They just haven't been able to match that lately.

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  12. It's like this:
    Cool sounding part.
    Uninteresting refrain.
    CL rap.

    And this trifecta of a downslope rollercoaster happens a second time, right after CL finsihes her crap.

    The MV's really fancy, though and Dara looks cute with that short brown hair.

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  13. And still everybody seems to be praising this shit/song, smh...

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  14. Park Bom needs SNSD's Time Machine - before all the surgery she looked pretty.

    Now it is just awkward watching her try and display emotion when her face cannot move.

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  15. im just glad i am not the only one thinking naughty things when i heard dara's "cum baby baby, cum cum baby" ^_^

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  16. The only thing I have to "praise" is that at least the MV is completely different from the typical kpop video.
    Also, didn't Minzy get plastic surgery? because her face still the same. lol

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    1. Yeah I could tell during the Missing You promotions but now she looks the same.

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  17. I can't stand 2NE1 ballads. Dara and CL sound terrible without heavy autotune.

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  18. The unplugged version drops 22 pounds of uranium on Mister, and if the original version didn't have the "cum bby bby cum cum" and CL's ear-molesting stretched voice after, "Come back home," everything would have been perfect.

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  19. Replies
    1. bitch can't sing to save her fucking life

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    2. man its kpop, talent is the last thing required here.

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  20. Speaking of 2NE1, are you guys going to cover the supposed Muslim/CL scandal thing? I came on expecting to see a blog post about it actually, that's how big it's getting (well, i DO live in an Arab country so thaat might be why) but I'm really eager to hear your opinions on it

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  21. Bom's voice is one of most irritating things in the world and am I the only one who thinks that Dara's hair in Happy looks fucked up?!

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    1. hmm.are you indian by any chance? Kab se korean gana sunna shuru kar di? mein toh 2012 se...

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  22. Dara looks awesome like always...Loved the MV just for her. And Bom's frozen face was kinda funny...
    The Song sounds better if you erase that nasal-autotunes "Come back hooooooooome," and the ensuing " cum baby baby cum cum baby..."

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