Stupid Things Fangirls Utter 29

Best Yahoo K-pop fangirl there was.

The Shure Super 55 microphone test - does your bias fail it? Probably.

If you casually browse any forum devoted to k-pop, you'll quickly see that there's a lot of nonsense going around the place about the relative talents of vocalists, as if vocal talent is a criteria that actually means something in this style.  I mean, come on people, since when was vocal talent suddenly a requirement to make production-line pop music?  I must have missed the latest memo that was circulated on that topic, because it seems that there's tons of fans fighting over who can sing better and who is the most knowledgeable and talented musically, versus who is just a nugu to music that is just being told what to say, what to play, how to stand, where to go, and is the musical equivalent of the "airhead" reporter on Broadcast News (decent film from the 80s, worth a look) who just reads lines from cue and smiles and doesn't know what the fuck he's actually on about or what any of the news stories really mean. Of course, most k-pop fans believe that their bias COULD NEVER BE LIKE THAT and is THE BEST EVAAAR AND KNOWS EVERYTHING ABOUT MUSIC, so I thought that even though I personally have no vested interest in this topic whatsoever, it would be interesting to devise a test to set the record straight and see how much they really do know.  Even better, I thought, if this test didn't require any knowledge of actual music production or vocal skill on the part of  the tester or even any listening to the songs and anybody with access to a computer could do it in an instant.

I have devised just such a test, and I'm going to break it down for you in a nice long tl;dr post only because I know you're all into that sort of thing here at AKFG.  Details after the jump.

How to: Be forgettable, as told by Hello Venus

Hello Venus' latest song is, well, I forget.

INFINITE's Sunggyu replaces Brown Eyed Girls' Ga-In as eyeliner icon

"On the February 27th broadcast of MBC‘s ‘Radio Star‘, Sunggyu featured as a guest and surprised viewers with his unexpected obsession with eyeliner. MC Yoo Sae Yoon revealed, “There is a rumor that to Sunggyu, eyeliner is his soulmate to the point that he can tell Ga In to step back.”

Sunggyu then explained himself, saying, “Ever since I was little, my eyes were really small. My mom’s eyes are like that as well. So if I don’t wear eyeliner, I feel like I’m missing something. Eyeliner became an important part of me. It’s kind of a performance.”

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I'm sorry. Is this what we have come to? This is news, Allkpop?

All I can say is:

Can You Listen To The Most Iconic Kpop Rap For Ten Minutes Straight?

Real Proof That Suzy Is A Fat Whore

Rainbow is unpopular due to a lack of scandals?

According to Jaekyung, that's the case. If that's so, then show us your tits Jaekyung and Rainbow will become really popular.