Tuesday, September 29, 2015

I bought some shades to support Sica's shade

Today (Asia, not in the West) is 9/30, the one-year anniversary of Jessica getting kicked out. Blanc & Eclare is having a sale today.

You can read a bunch of crybaby Sones crying about Sica's marketing ploy.

It makes the $233.75 I spent worth it.

Turns Out YG is Just As Arrogant As He's Rumored to Be

Thug Velvet. I like.

Unlike most authors on this blog, I don't have some pent-up hatred toward YG. I treat them as I would any other company in the sense that when YG releases a gem, I'm just fine with them, and when they don't, I'm not. However, I do find YG in general to have the most delusional fans of any company, along with having some artists in way over their pretty little heads.

But as always, the apple doesn't fall too far from the tree.

Monday, September 28, 2015

Candy Jelly Hate - understanding k-pop business decisions

It doesn't matter what the situation is, everybody's got an opinion about how k-pop agencies should run their artists.  Surely with such a wealth of business knowledge coming from both Korean and international netizens, it's a wonder that any k-pop agencies ever lose money and have misfortunes at all!  If only k-pop agencies took heed of the plethora of free advice and popular opinion out there on the Internet, nobody in k-pop need ever fail at anything ever again!


So why do k-pop agencies continue to act like they know what's in their own best interests?  Why don't they just listen to us and do what we want?  Read on as Kpopalypse demystifies the mystical mysteries of some of k-pop's more mysterious business decisions!

Sunday, September 27, 2015

[MV Review] Red Velvet - Dumb Dumb

So in my quest to catch up on K-pop, since there were a bajillion comebacks from girl groups this summer (which is a good thing), I decided to just pick the most recent song that I know about. I knew that SM was going to promote SNSD, Red Velvet and f(x) back-to-back, and thank fucking God SM pushed SNSD out first so that SNSD could quickly promote their shitty fucking songs and let their sister groups promote better songs without being overshadowed.

Saturday, September 26, 2015

..And You Thought Kim Kwang Soo was Retarded

We've all ragged on the dumb decisions Kim Kwang Soo has made, such as putting Hwadog in T-ara when it was absolutely unnecessary or proposing Dani (a half-human, half-Giraffe) to be included in T-ara, but Kim Kwang Soo has never made a decision this retarded.

Friday, September 25, 2015

Best of the Worst: Sept. 25, 2015

Hello, everyone. Are you ready to lose more brain cells? Then join us for another round of Best of the Worst!

Today we have a meaningful and enlightening discussion about female idols' thighs, an idol who likes late-night drunk food, and a really weird campaign with VIXX:

Tuesday, September 22, 2015

Kpopalypse Nugu Alert Episode 13: pinkfunniAde, Yaya, Nutaz

Hi there cao ni mas, and welcome to another episode of:


Your favourite series of music that nobody besides me and maybe three other people give a fuck about is back!  Read on to listen to even more nugus for your nugutainment!

Sunday, September 20, 2015

Which Male Idols Do You Want to See More Of? - Results Cycle

JB didn't get voted on enough to make the list. I just think he's really fucking hot.

I know this took forever, but I tallied everything up by hand and school started. But I'm back. I calculated to votes, and now you pick your top five male idols. The reasons why I didn't pick out of the list is because A LOT of them wound up with ties, hence the reason for this.

Saturday, September 19, 2015

Up10tion - 'So Dangerous'

Up10tion recently debuted with "So Dangerous" earlier this month (Sept. 10) and have peaked my interest because after watching the MV just once I couldn't get them out of my head.

Thursday, September 17, 2015

Best of the Worst: Sept. 17, 2015

Wow, people were really mad this week about all kinds of stupid shit. There's always some people making a big deal about nothing, but this week had a much higher than average pissy meter.

Netizens got "outraged" at a company's choice of transportation for their singer, an idol's choice of bra, and lipstick application.

I think you got a little, uh, something on your lip.

Sunday, September 13, 2015

Who Siwon Should Have Supported

So I have been really busy this week and have spent about 10 minutes on K-pop this week, with 9 of those watching Red Velvet's "Dumb Dumb" and the other minute seeing SJWs around the K-pop blogosphere being intolerant of Siwon's intolerant views...which should make his views tolerant then, right?

Anyway, Siwon shouldn't have supported Kim Davis. Here's who he should have supported:

POSITIVE post - Siwon (Super Junior)

Kpopalypse is back one again, fighting against the forces of cynicism and negativity in k-pop with another POSITIVE post!  The subject of today's POSITIVE post is Super Junior's Siwon!


Saturday, September 12, 2015

Your Summer 2015 favourites

It's late, but it's finally here. The results of the Summer 2015 Hits. Your favourites. Who got the most votes? Who didn't get that many? Let's find out in a very long, not very wordy, post!

Thursday, September 10, 2015

Best of the Worst: Sept. 10, 2015

Hola, friends! We are back with another round of Best of the Worst. This week, we have an idol with naughty hands, a drunk star making a scene during someone else's performance, and an epic battle of "Who Wore It Better" — Seolhyun or Cardboard Cutout Seolhyun?

Weekly Showdown: Red Velvet Special!

So Red Velvet recently came back with "Dumb Dumb," which was a pretty good song, and the best thing is that it gets better every time you hear it. My only complaint: Irene's bullshit rap break. She should just stick to being pretty.

Before I get to the actual showdown, it's time to reveal last showdown's results! I was pleasantly surprised to see that "Rainstorm" won over "Dark Panda" by a good 20 votes. My best guess is that some people just aren't into hipster trap music (so sorry if both are considered trap music. I hardly know anything about musical genres, and I basically skipped through half of Kpopalypse's music genre-educational-article-thingy-thing because I could hardly understand shit. So sorry to Kpopalypse, too. You're awesome and all, but I should probably just stick to learning about photosynthesis).

This week's showdown features RV's top two releases of the year, "Ice Cream Cake" and "Dumb Dumb."

Tuesday, September 8, 2015

CL Tries to Pull a Saul Williams and Fails + Relationship Works

Look, I got nothing against CL. In fact, she's my 2NE1 bias mostly for being the most interesting and entertaining member as well as being the most attractive member in the group to me. However, we can't deny that she's approaching some of the issues she's been discussing rather ignorantly.

Monday, September 7, 2015

The Crayon Pop Twins Identification Test

Avid k-pop fans are having the trouble telling the difference between Crayon Pop's twins, Choa and Way.  Kpopalypse is here to help!


There are already several helpful guides available online to assist Crayon Pop fans to tell the difference between these two girls, so a simple websearch should give you all that you need to tell Choa and Way apart under normal circumstances.  But what about those more unusual circumstances in life where the distinction may not be immediately obvious, but where it might still be important to be able to differentiate between the two girls?  Read on for a helpful list of questions and answers that I've prepared, which will help you and the people you love differentiate Choa and Way in those crucial important times of need!

Types of Fans

If you're new to Kpop, you might have heard people here and there talking about how crazy Kpop fans can be. But you may not know what the fuck is going on. If that's the case, then this article, my friend, is for you. If you aren't really new to Kpop and know all about retarded fans, then get ready to nod your head and relate.

So without further adieu, let's go through the types of fans, more specifically, types of Kpop fans, because we don't give two shits about anything that's not Kpop in this blog.

Sunday, September 6, 2015

8 Reasons Why SNSD's New Album Isn't So Bad After All

It has nothing to do with the leg-spread. This is just for eye-candy.

SNSD has never been an album-driven group. I'd know since I own a few of their albums. After their debut album, things went downhill in the non-title track departure right up until they had their least-favoured song, "I Got a Boy," where all the other songs on that album (minus those two ballads) were pretty good. However, after all of the hate this album has been getting, I feel the need to stick up for it since it is one SNSD's much better albums.

Saturday, September 5, 2015

The August Honours List

Wow, August wasn't completely deplorable. Let's see what my embarrassing taste has seen me listening to on repeat this month.

Fapcams Madness 3: 'Wiggle Wiggle'

It's ime for fapcams of "Wiggle Wiggle," which almost perfectly fits the spirit of this series.

I had a hard time choosing an "original" fancam, but after quite some time, I decided to use this one:

Why Seoyoung and not Alice or any other member? Simple:

1. Wiggle, wiggle, wiggle
2. Her facial expressions makes everything better. (This skill would make her AV goddess.)

Let's see if any of the "covers" is better than the "original."

Friday, September 4, 2015

An introduction to k-pop music genres

Have you ever wondered what the fuck music reviewers are talking about when they discuss music genres in k-pop?  When is a piece of music one genre and not another?  Are these writers and journalists just pulling these music terms out of their ass or what?  It seems that many of you in fact wonder a lot about different music genres because I get questions all the time about it.  Of course, you could look the answers up on Wikipedia if you wanted, but what Wikipedia won't give you is the k-pop connection and k-pop music examples.  That's where Kpopalypse comes in!  If you've ever wondered about how to tell your pop from your rock, your ska from your reggae and your hip from your hop, then this is the post for you!

t-ara eun) copy2

Bless Dal Shabet!

So Dal Shabet are on some kind of vacation (i'm too lazy too check).

Normally, I wouldn't really care, but ...

this happened:

A photo posted by jo ka eun (@jjojjo_eun) on


But wait! There's more :D

Thursday, September 3, 2015

Best of the Worst: Sept. 3, 2015

Hello again, friends! This week in ridiculous kpop news, we have a rapper who is most definitely not in a sex tape, a model whose breasts are most definitely not fake, and Namjoo:

Which Male Idols Do You Guys Want To See More Of?

I know this is shocking considering my first couple of articles outside the SHINee one was female centered. But the main reason HYS_Fag hired me was to bring in more fanservice for the straight female AKF readers as well homosexual males that read the blog. Have no fear: I am your girl. I will be doing this similar to how Oreo Monster did their Ultimate Kpop Music Awards Show. You guys chose the top five, then vote for the nominations, and the top picks will be in one giant post. Simply follow the link below, and enter your top 5 favorite male idols that you think have the best visuals among k-pop. I would just post some of my own faves, but I know my biases don't align with most people's so I'm leaving the choice up to you, the readers. 

Nominate Your Faves Here.

Wednesday, September 2, 2015

Conspiracy on Conspiracy (in) K-Pop 4: Illuminati are everywhere! Part 3

Freemasons don't sleep, and they are stronger than ever. With the latest k-pop releases, they are trying even harder to gather minions and brainwash innocent teens to fight for NWO!

Let’s see which k-pop releases you should avoid if you don’t want to become a gay, satan-worshiping, Illuminati slave!

I chose four recent MVs and examined them. Here is what I found:

Tuesday, September 1, 2015

Summer 2015 hits

Aug. 31 marks the official end of summer in Korea. While it's winter where I am, I was able to experience summer through K-pop songs. Sadly, this isn't a good thing as a lot of the summer-themed comebacks in the past three months sucked. So, I've compiled a list of my top seven songs. These are all personal views, so you will likely disagree with the list. Granted, I have not stuck specifically to summer-themed songs, because if I did, the list wouldn't go past three ... So without further ado, the top songs of K-pop summer 2015.
/Also a poll for your favourite song this season/