Thursday, December 29, 2011

This is probably how I would look standing next to Jesus.

Posted by at

I mean, come on <read to self in Will Arnett's voice for maximum effect>, Hyoyeon is already the ugliest member by far (i bare no ill will, insidewat counts lar = =). Why dress her up in a tacky jumpsuit and place her next to Sica while she's looking classy as fuck? (As my fellow Jessica fans may have noticed, her physical appearance tends to greatly fluctuate {one day she'll look as regal as a queen, the next, she'll look like a horse that needs braces}. Through great research, I was able to formulate an algorithm, loosely based on the lunar calender, that explained the supernatural phenomenon and its pattern. And before you ask, no it is not related to her menstrual cycle. But I digress (and yes, I realize that the word digress is a fucking pretentious word to use, so is 'pretentious'. Shut the fuck up and stop digressing me).


s!b: Hyoyeon is my favorite SNSD member.





However, as one reader nicely put it: "here is not kpop secrets ok?" I do not wish to spark comparisons and have cumloads of Kpopsecret readers visiting our site again.
An official 'cumload'.
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41 comments:

  1. timchanDecember 29, 2011 at 1:06 AM

    So, the purpose of this article is to bash on Hyoyeon? or a not so subtle hint to fap at IU's gif?

    ReplyDelete
  2. IcorisDecember 29, 2011 at 1:08 AM

    TL;DR

    IU GIF. WIN.

    ReplyDelete
  3. UnknownDecember 29, 2011 at 1:18 AM

    A Horse with a head and A drag queen with an ugly jumpsuit...

    ReplyDelete
  4. AnonymousDecember 29, 2011 at 1:33 AM

    SARANGHAE SNSD NOONAS SICA SARANGHAEYO HYOYEON DANCING QUEEN DAEBAK SARANGHAEEEEEEE

    luls

    ReplyDelete
  5. AnonymousDecember 29, 2011 at 1:39 AM

    EXPLAIN S!B

    ReplyDelete
  6. AnonymousDecember 29, 2011 at 2:00 AM

    i think all the girls in snsd are gorgeous

    ReplyDelete
  7. AnonymousDecember 29, 2011 at 2:14 AM

    I dont think i will ever be able to find hyoyeon attractive. Lately shes been looking kind of plastic. And jessica just looks like a retarded donkey at all times. Girl needs to fix her gums or some shit

    ReplyDelete
  8. Amber M. S.December 29, 2011 at 3:39 AM

    I think she looks thicke and full unlike flat face boney ass Jessica nuff said women with meat on them are sexy and skinny bitches like Sica can learn a thing or two to gain some fucking weight and stop trying to look like cardboard all the time
    -Peace in the Middle East

    ReplyDelete
  9. AnonymousDecember 29, 2011 at 4:05 AM

    you know what? i enjoyed reading the articles on this site when they were entertaining and they weren't full of bullshit. now all i see is bashing and judgmental comments on idols. fucking hell, all the articles nowdays are a waste of space. what has hyoyeon done to you? nothing, she probably doesn't even know you exist yet you call her an ogre and call her ugly. she might be the worst singer in SNSD and not be as attractive as Yoona or another member, but she has one of the best personalities. all you authors are just a bunch of hypocrites because you guys dedicate a blog to delusional fans that are so biased when you're all biased too? that's fucked up. you guys don't deserve the views anymore. god, i'm sick of all this bullshit. :@

    ReplyDelete
  10. AnonymousDecember 29, 2011 at 4:09 AM

    "she might be the worst singer in SNSD and not be as attractive as Yoona or another member, but she has one of the best personalities"
    Do you know her irl?

    ReplyDelete
  11. AnonymousDecember 29, 2011 at 4:13 AM

    Even with my glasses off I can tell hyo is ugly that's how horrid she is and I'm laughing at the ppl comparing Jessica to hyo how on earth do u guys do that lol. only uglier ppl that hyo will find her attractive while the average looking person would find her repulsive. She's in a group of 9 supposedly "beautiful" girls in which she does not even belong in. "best dancer" lool I don't think so. She only gets hyped for her dancing since that's all she's got and it's not even wow factor. Being the best dancer in the group doesn't mean shit when their choreography is simple. She doesn't stand out, can't sing, not attractive 9th place in the group, ppl don't even want to b coupled up with her in gameshows, her dancing skill is also useless. All u ppl defending her keeps saying the same artificial shit, stop being dumbasses because she doesn't fit in an idol group at all u delusional fucktards. Happy early new years and a reality check.

    ReplyDelete
  12. AnonymousDecember 29, 2011 at 4:14 AM

    SNSD lesbo-gang QQ-ing

    ReplyDelete
  13. AnonymousDecember 29, 2011 at 4:17 AM

    Hyoyeon already underated but sm always do a horrible things for her. I don't even sure that sm care about her. I mean, why should sm debuted her on snsd if sm would never ever give her treat like the other members.
    I always shympatic to her and she's my favorite in snsd.

    ReplyDelete
  14. AnonymousDecember 29, 2011 at 4:19 AM

    Who's first on your list ofthe best snsd member? Bet chyuu it's not hyoyeon first

    ReplyDelete
  15. Kpop is dead nowDecember 29, 2011 at 4:26 AM

    Kuroki meisa trollin and shitting on all the kpoppers I luv it 143 <3

    ReplyDelete
  16. NikitaDecember 29, 2011 at 4:45 AM

    but sunny ist the ugliest member of snsd.

    ReplyDelete
  17. AnonymousDecember 29, 2011 at 6:04 AM

    hyoyeon again. you claim to hate her looks yet you are uploading a shitload photos to your blog. your obsession with her is terrifying.this gets really annoying, just rest the case. we know you actually love her.

    ReplyDelete
  18. PizzaDecember 29, 2011 at 6:26 AM

    Let me recap what I said in chat a while ago.
    What's up with this post?
    It looks like it was written by a 10-year old who knows who Will Arnett is.
    Sure I'm not expecting a great article about just 1 picture, but God damn. Half of the words are crossed out. I even changed browsers just to check if it was supposed to be that way.

    You could've easily made a joke about the baby bear skin on the table or how you can look over the fake wall behind them.

    and can someone fix the times new roman on this website please? It makes the site look like it was made with notepad.

    Happy holidays

    ReplyDelete
  19. Suckmydee.December 29, 2011 at 7:03 AM

    lol, I was quite shocked how Hyoyeon looked better than Taeyeon in their little photobook for the Japanese repack album.

    ReplyDelete
  20. XissuomynonaDecember 29, 2011 at 7:06 AM

    I genuinely think Hyoyeon has a beautiful smile, but she can't walk around with a smile all day so haha awkward.
    I do enjoy watching her on variety shows though [I'm basically watching Dangerous Boys for her and the kid she's mentoring], and I think she is easily one of the best female dancers in kpop. Far more relevant than some of her peers, even without looks.

    ReplyDelete
  21. XissuomynonaDecember 29, 2011 at 7:07 AM

    And also, yuck.

    Sorry, but I feel really sicked out when people make dirty jokes about IU. Its so wrong.

    ReplyDelete
  22. AnonymousDecember 29, 2011 at 9:05 AM

    > be anon on akpfg
    > reading dumbass article by oldfag
    > suddenly i see the words TREE FIDDY
    > take out hyoyeon's face
    > blast that motherfucking loch ness monster back into SM's anus
    > what the actual fuck

    ReplyDelete
  23. AnonymousDecember 29, 2011 at 9:41 AM

    hyo look bad but tbh sica doesn't look that great either in that pic...

    ReplyDelete
  24. davidfreshDecember 29, 2011 at 10:52 AM

    4:19 - I told you, Hyo is my favorite.

    ReplyDelete
  25. nothingDecember 29, 2011 at 11:19 AM

    hyo looks like my butthole

    ReplyDelete
  26. AnonymousDecember 29, 2011 at 2:12 PM

    Nikita got it right.

    ReplyDelete
  27. AnonymousDecember 29, 2011 at 2:24 PM

    if Hyo is the ugliest, that means all of SNSD members are ugly then? O.o

    ReplyDelete
  28. AnonymousDecember 29, 2011 at 2:27 PM

    Sulli_fag, I bet you butthole is much more uglier than Hyo..

    ReplyDelete
  29. AnonymousDecember 29, 2011 at 2:39 PM

    It's not wrong to call Hyoyeon ugly because she is actually ugly.

    ReplyDelete
  30. AnonymousDecember 29, 2011 at 3:11 PM

    Hyo's one of my favorite SNSD members but i'm not going to delude myself into thinking that it's because of her face.
    that picture, Jessica looks like she's part of the background and elegantly fits. i thought Hyo was shopped in at first

    ReplyDelete
  31. AnonymousDecember 29, 2011 at 5:58 PM

    I used to hate on Hyogre cuz I thought she was ugly..
    But now I find her decently attractive...
    I like watching her on variety shows too

    ReplyDelete
  32. AnonymousDecember 29, 2011 at 7:40 PM

    HYOYEONS SHOES DUN EVEN FIT!2111111!!!!!!!!

    ReplyDelete
  33. AnonymousDecember 29, 2011 at 9:28 PM

    Although I agree that Hyoyeon is ugly and one of the 2 ugly members of SNSD (including Sunny, can't stand her face and her over the top cutesy. At least i can stand looking at Hyo, I don't think that picture above was worth writing an article. Because it is definitely not her worst picture. It's actually one of the better pics she has and the comparison with Jessica is just..... -.- Because Jessica doesn't look that good in that photo either. She's just bland and boring there. I actually thought Hyo caught my eyes more than Jessica there [and it was not because she was so ugly i couldnt ignore].

    But in general, yes she's very ugly for an idol and i still dont know why SM decided to choose her. On top of that, her voice is shit and she cant sing her lines (which only consist of a few words) properly most of the time. I don't know how her fans have the confidence to ask SM to take away the lead singers' lines and give to her (suddenly remember seeing a comment on Youtube which blamed Seohyun for the lack of Hyo's lines in The great escape LOL)

    ReplyDelete
  34. AnonymousDecember 30, 2011 at 2:14 AM

    Does s!b stand for "such bullshit"?

    ReplyDelete
  35. AnonymousDecember 30, 2011 at 10:31 AM

    Hyoyeon is in SNSD so the rest of the girls look prettier than how they really are. I genuinely feel bad for her tho, seeing as some people think Jessica is any better, especially in that photo, when Jessica's outfit looks tacky and over the top, while a passable jumpsuit gets shat on because it's on Hyo.

    ReplyDelete
  36. AnonymousDecember 30, 2011 at 3:34 PM

    Sunny just got ugly. She used to be cute back in the Gee days and before that. Hyoyeon's remained ugly.

    ReplyDelete
  37. AnonymousDecember 31, 2011 at 12:00 AM

    @4:13 Wow I think Hyoyeon would cry if she read that. Every thing's true, of course, but calling her repulsive is a bit harsh. It's not like she's Cruella De Vil. She can look nice sometimes, especially when she's smiling. She might be an ugly idol, but not an ugly person.

    ReplyDelete
  38. AnonymousDecember 31, 2011 at 5:09 AM

    you know hyoyeon doesn't have a personality like seohyun's if you watch variety shows where she expresses her humour and her personality. if you guys didn't judge her so fucking much then you would know.

    ReplyDelete
  39. AnonymousDecember 31, 2011 at 10:16 PM

    fuck off with you bashing hyoyeon.

    ReplyDelete
  40. AnonymousJanuary 2, 2012 at 6:16 PM

    5:09 Seohyun is above Girls Penetration.

    ReplyDelete
  41. AnonymousJanuary 25, 2012 at 12:28 PM

    WHO'S THE EVIL WITCH OF THE WEST AND THE EVIL WITCH OF THE EAST?

    ReplyDelete

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