POSITIVE post: 3 people who I like in k-pop right now

I've recently been alerted to the fact that some people think my k-pop blogging is "negative" and that I'm just hating on everything I can for cheap jokes and generally getting off on being a rude and unpleasant person.  Gosh, what a strange perception.  This is obviously untrue as clearly someone who genuinely hated k-pop wouldn't spend so much time writing about it, so why are some people so easily confused about this?

Dani is a perfect 10

I live in Australia, but I'm not a "patriot" (ewww gross) or a "proud Australian" (bleuuurgh), because anyone who is a "proud Australian" actually isn't culturally Australian whatsoever - they're a fake, a tryhard.  We don't even have people like that.  If you ever see a group of drunk Australians watching a sports match, and the Australians are winning, and the drunks start cheering and shouting "Aussie Aussie Aussie, Oi Oi Oi"... those are not real Australians, they are "decoy Australians" deployed by our government to fool potential terrorist threats so they hopefully detonate the bomb in the wrong spot.  If you catch a Southern Cross tattoo on some exposed flesh that just means they're part of the "elite decoy unit".  There probably isn't even real beer in those glasses but some kind of flame-retardant liquid (or maybe it's Fosters, unquestionably not a real beer but a British beer that nobody in Australia even drinks).

(All Fosters drinkers are about as Australian as Taeyeon in this photo)

Davichi Bails On CCM

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T-error...'nuff said.

This is a rant, straight up.

This boy went HARD. These images were tweeted to 5-ara. I cackle maniacally.

I ran out of popcorn GIFs, because there isn't enough popcorn in the fucking world to feed people following this drama. This is blowing the fuck up baby. And I love it.

Stay stupid my friends.

[DRAMA] T-ara are rude bitches...or are they? Yeah, they are.

STRAIGHT OUTTA THE CHEAT'S EVIDENCE FILES: T-ERROR EDITION

You all know what happened. I don't have to write anything. This shit speaks for itself.


(quick recap)
1. Hwayoung injures herself, can't perform much at T-ara's Japanese concert.
2. Boram, Soyeon, Hyomin, Eunjung and Jiyeon ambiguously and passive-aggressively diss Hwayoung on Twitter for being a lazy beach.
3. Hwayoung tweets something passive-aggressive and ambiguous in response.
4. Tarae (Hwadog's rap coach) tweets something entirely unambiguous and aggressive at T-ara, defending her student.
5. Hyodog (not to be confused with Hyogre) tweets supportive messages to Hwadog.
6. Hwadog tweets more ambiguously emotional stuff.
7. Meanwhile, CCM claims "T-ara would never write this catty nonsense and their accounts were...hacked." Nobody believes them, T-ara (minus Qri and Hwadog) look like beaches. Which they are.
8. Kim Kwang Soo (no relation to Kim Jong-il...I think) announces he will make an even BIGGER announcement on July 30th about T-ara (which Chuckus and Jakkuman will cover). Not sure why he didn't just make the BIG announcement...when he made the first announcement. But hey, he's a fucktard.
9. Hyomin changes her Twitter profile pic to a book cover that reads "Everything Happens For A Reason."
10. Boram allegedly unfollows Hwayoung on Twitter. Netizens claim "shit is going down, son."

So while Chuckus and Jakkuman are busy writing their male on male steamy collaboration about the T-ara controversy (pending THE BIG ANNOUNCEMENT), The Cheat has decided to compile evidence of T-ara's bitchiness. I knew there was I reason I didn't like these broads! Furthermore, as The Cheat is always cognizant of his audience's desire for baseless conjecture, The Cheat has also decided to come up with SIX conspiracy theories regarding this controversy and what it could mean.


Also, from now on, T-ara is known as T-error. Because they're not only frighteningly stupid, they're terrible AND they have seemingly destroyed their careers with an error in judgement. Plus, T-error sounds like T-ara.


Check it out after the jump.

I call this macro "The Most Incompetent Girl Group in the World". Stay classy my bitches.

KKS TROLLS THE FUCK OUT OF ME AGAIN WITH THIS PEDO SHIT!? (T-ara-Day by Day Teaser)

 Let the BULLSHIT BEGIN!

I'm so freakin' pissed right now. KKS made me wait until 2am to see this BOOOWWWLLSHIT!!! Like seriously, I was thinking this was gonna be a Hyomin-centric MV/teaser and the first shot I get is...

T-ara's ninth member is 12, eighth member still a mystery.

Should have given her the name "Too Young"

Oh T-ara, you never fail to amaze me with your crazy antics. I should blame KKS for this, but come on, do the girls have no say at all? Okay, so they have no say at all, but I'd imagine some of the members might have some misgivings about a thirteen year old member joining their ranks.

Here are the facts:
- Dani is turning 14 this year. In Korean years, presumably, meaning she's twelve right now and turning thirteen later in the year.
- She will debut in December, while the mysterious eighth member will debut in July (probably so KKS can kick out some of the baddies in the mean time).
- She resembles a very young, female Seungri.
- She was raised in the US since she was four...so that means no more of this:

I get the feeling that KKS is going to pull some additional bullshit and the eighth member will be like 28 or some shit. Now THAT would be funny.

EDIT:
More Hyomin goodness. She apparently turned 23 on May 30th, sharing her birthday with Yoona.

Celebrate Yoona's birthday, or spend the night with Hyomin? I know what I'd choose. The first option of course.

I know what SHE got for her birthday...heh heh.

In case the innuendo was too subtle, SUNNY AND HER HAD THE SEXUAL RELATIONS.