Saturday, June 4, 2016

How AKF Ruined AOA - Part One

For the best understanding of the background for this fanfic, be sure to read the following fanfics from 2014:

Fanfic Fridays: AKF Bangs Every Member In Popu Lady

Thus Spake Jiyeonthustra

Kpopalypse and AKF's Red Light Mission - Part 1

Kpopalypse and AKF's Red Light Mission - Part Two

Kpopalypse and AKF's Red Light Mission - Part Three

"Damn, I thought heaven would be much better," AKF said to Brave Brothers. "Then again, I'm surprised I made it here after blowing both of us up."

"Well, I'm still collecting royalties even dead," laughed Brave Brothers. "Luckily I had created plenty of songs for AOA to use through 2015," sighed Brave Brothers. "However, they have a comeback soon and I ran out of songs for them to use. I need to return to Earth soon so that I can make more money."

"Well, it looks like Kpopalypse is the only one who wants to stay up here in heaven," AKF said as he could hear moans in the next room. God had given Kpopalypse some clones of Raina and he literally spent every waking moment having an orgy with a bunch of Rainas. He actually was in his own heaven,

"Yeah, I doubt he wants to join us any time soon," AKF said. "Anyway, it's time to appeal to God to let us go back down to Earth."

"Sure, I need to go back and save K-pop before Duble Sidekick ruins it for the rest of us," said Brave Brothers as he snapped his fingers and changed his hat. "I need a ghetto looking hat," said Brave Brothers as he kept on snapping his fingers, with a new hat replacing the old one each time.

"You're going to trigger someone by saying that," AKF told Brave Brothers.

"Nigga, you have been spending too much time possessing the spirit of that white, fat neckbeard who eats casserole all the time in his mom's basement," retorted Brave Brothers. "If anyone wants to talk about triggering people, it's you."

"Hey man, that guy is the only one who I can possess," AKF replied. 

"Speaking of spirit possession," said a voice from outside the room as the door opened. "You need to stop that shit."

"God?!" gasped Brave Brothers and AKF.

"I heard you guys saying that you want to go back to Earth," said God.

Both of them shook their heads.

"I take it Kpopalypse doesn't want to go out," mused God.

"I'll go back to Earth in my own fanfic!" yelled Kpopalypse from the other room.

"Alright," God send as both of his hands started glowing. "I'm going to send you both back to Earth in your physical forms that you had before AKF pulled a jihad." God placed a hand each on Brave Brothers and AKF. "AKF, I am sick of you possessing people on Earth just to continue your shenanigans."

As soon as AKF gained back his physical body, he looked down his pants. "Mother fucker, I still don't have a dick! What the fucking fuck?!" AKF screamed.

"Why do you not have a dick?" asked Brave Brothers. 

"Well, I got raped by a disgustingly fat prostitute in Taiwan after having an orgy with the Popu Lady members. I contracted every STD known to man, so I had to chop my dick off. I tried committing suicide, by Jiyeon's powers saved me. I wanted to go thank her, so I went to Korea, but got sidetracked and met Kpopalypse in Korea. We were trying to bang our favorite member in f(x), but got roped into a conspiracy plot which lead to me blowing both of us up," AKF replied.

"Damn, dawg," said Brave Brothers as he was scribbling some notes. "I could use your story for a song some day."

AKF looked down at his phone and received a text message from God. "So, recently the first penis transplant happened, and God says that I have one match in this whole world."

"So, we're going to go find this fucker and take his penis?" asked Brave Brothers.

"You're God damn right," said AKF. "Luckily, he's also here in Korea, so we're going to go find him."

Later that day, AKF and Brave Brothers entered into a hotel. AKF walked up to the front desk and raised his right hand. A white light came out and engulfed the lady at the front desk. AKF, who had taken possession of the woman, reached for a card key and put in the code to unlock room 69. The woman gave Brave Brothers the key and AKF reverted back to his own body.

As AKF and Brave Brothers started walking towards room 69, Brave Brothers turned to AKF. "Assuming you take control of the dude's body, how is the operation going to be performed?"

"God said he would come down to Earth and perform the surgery himself. He told me that I just needed to be in the same room as the match and to take possession of his body," AKF said.

"That's real nice of him," said Brave Brothers.

"He's probably doing this so that I don't possess anyone's body so that I can bang all of Twice's legal members," AKF replied.

"I'd say that's pretty smart," said Brave Brothers.

AKF and Brave Brothers got to room 69 and Brave Brothers inserted the card key. They both entered the room after Brave Brothers opened the door to find an old nemesis.

As Johnny Noh looked at AKF and Brave Brothers, AKF could only groan. A bright white light flashed and God had appeared in the room.

"Why did Johnny Noh have to be my match for the penile transplant?" AKF asked.

"Because I thought it would be fucking hilarious," said God.


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