Pump up the pearly volume - big boobs in k-pop guide part 4

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Results of the KPOPALYPSE 2016 objectification survey part 2 – BEST FEMALE BOOBS and MALE ABS in k-pop!

It's time for part 2 of the results of the Kpopalypse 2016 objectification survey!  Let's find out who has the best boobs and abs in k-pop in 2016 according to Kpopalypse readers!

Kpopalypse's 10 most fappable k-pop music videos of 2015

Let's be real for a moment and mention that apart from a few crybabies that can't handle what I write, and a few other people who don't follow k-pop closely and therefore appreciate the discovery value of finding stuff that they missed, nobody gives a shit about any of my lists apart from this one.  Favourite songs, worst songs?  Who the fuck cares about some Australian asshole's opinion.  Christmas bullshit?  It's a foregone conclusion that it all sucks, every year.  Don't worry readers, I know what you really want.

The year has come and gone so now is the time you've been waiting for, where Kpopalypse reveals the most fappable faptastic k-pop FVs of 2015!  Prepare yourself appropriately and read on if you dare!

Big boobs in k-pop guide part 3 - private parts investigations

In the never ending quest to determine boob size, Kpopalypse is back with the third big boobs in k-pop post!  Several new busty entrants in k-pop have appeared, plus there are still many existing idols who have not been covered.  Come on another journey into (or perhaps between) the breasts of your favourite Korean idols!

Be warned - this post is bigger than Qri's implants, so it might lag a little on slower devices, like netizens' brains.  Proceed with caution!

The Kpopalypse 2015 bias list

I while ago I made a bias list because everyone was always asking me what k-pop girls I liked, and why, so rather than explain who I liked and why I liked my favourites over and over, I could just lazily link people to the list which did all the explaining for me.  However, it's been about a year since that list was made, and there have been new entrants into k-pop who have come to my attention, "got prettier" or otherwise met required standards.  As people constantly ask me about this shit, this means my existing bias list has become less and less useful over time.  Time to give the bias list a much-needed update, rejuggle and expansion!

Who will meet required standards?  Which new entrants will make it on?  Will any previous entrants be excluded?  Will people feel compelled to leave pointless comments below about how they disagree with my picks as if anyone really gives a shit what some random blogger asshole thinks are hot girls anyway?  Read on and find out as Kpopalypse reveals his top 10 biases!

Big boobs in k-pop guide part 2: the boobs that Kpopalypse forgot

Ever since I did my big boobs in k-pop guide post, I've been inundated with people complaining that my list left out their fave.  I knew this would happen, after all such an exhaustive topic is never going to be "complete".  Not only did I leave out some people, but several new performers have also emerged as possible contenders of interest, so it's time for a follow-up post to address these concerns and educate the general population in the virtues of k-pop boobs.

WARNING: before you click to read more - this post is bigger than Puer Kim's rack.  Prepare your browser appropriately for a large deluge of images of k-pop boobs.

Kpopalypse Ice Bucket Fap Challenge - the complete k-pop girl list

Many people had questions about the Ice Bucket Challenge.  Some people wanted to know "what is ALS?", "how can I donate?", "is this trend a good idea?", "is this objectifying?", "will I feel like a dumb trendy fuckstick if I do this?" and more.  My question was simpler - "which Ice Bucket Challenge among k-pop girls is the most fappable?".  This post seeks to answer this important question.

Kpopalypse fashion class - horizontal black and white stripes

Never one to shy away from the important issues surrounding k-pop, it's time for Kpopalypse to cover an often-misunderstood and misrepresented topic of great importance - the effect of horizontal black and white stripes on boob perception.  Welcome to Kpopalypse fashion class!

If you're anything like me, you'll be very sick and tired of the superfluous fashion articles that appear in k-pop media.  You've all seen them - some lazily tossed-off article about "oooh, look what [insert idol here] wore today, wow, isn't she so classy!".  If these worthless articles are not just paid for by the record company to help boost the idol's profile, they're churned out by the media outlet simply because nothing interesting was happening that week and someone had an article quota to meet - but they're functionally fairly useless.  If you're into k-pop fashion (or perving at k-pop fashion), surely you want some information that you can actually use.  Don't worry, Kpopalypse has got you covered!

6 k-pop idols who look like busty pornstars

You know the deal.  We've all been there.  You're sitting at home fapping to k-pop idols but you just can't get into the groove this time - you're having trouble maintaining your arousal.  You fap harder, you try some lube, you try your other hand, but it's no use.  You're in good physical condition, you're not even tired... relaxing and giving up for the moment, you sit and think about your predicament.  It becomes clear to to you that the problem is mental, not physical - after many years of fapping to k-pop videos and GIFs you've been finally desensitised to the coy, controlled, choreographed prancing and posing of you bias, and you need something more hardcore to keep your solo-libido going.  However, you don't want to fap to anyone but your bias.... because that would be like cheating... well, okay, not really... but you're delusional, so there's no talking to you.

NEVER FEAR - KPOPALYPSE IS HERE TO HELP!

Since we can't have k-pop stars doing porn because Korean laws are a super-conservative killjoy, I've taken the trouble of finding for you six lookalikes that you can search up on porn sites and use as a fap substitute while still keeping your mind clean and pure with thoughts of only your precious bias (assuming you bias is one of these six, but then, these six idols are pretty fucking smoking hot, so it probably is*).  These lookalikes definitely don't have the same body types, but they do have similar faces.  Or maybe they don't.  Whatever.  It's a k-pop porn post - why are you complaining?

Bring the girls out - a friendly and informative guide to big boobs in k-pop

After reading several astoundingly informative articles on Anti Kpop-Fangirl lately, I thought I'd better step up my game and not lose pace in the blogging information war.  So here it is - the k-pop boobs post you've all been waiting for/dreading.  I will perhaps never again deliver a post containing this much raw knowledge.  You are now about to benefit from my exhaustive research into the topic of female boob-appreciation, so I hope you appreciate it.

[MV Review] Kim Sori - Bikini

Don't even bother with the audio, just watch the MV.

I don't know why it took this long to write this for so little content, but w/e.

T-ae wants some cock........... tail.

Trufax: my first exposure to the word "netizens" was through the title of this video:

I thought "this video is pretty tame, really - what's a 'netizen' anyway, is that some kind of slang for an ultra-sexually conservative Internet censorship body who should be pushed under a bus and forgotten about?".  Little did I know how close to the truth that initial thought was.

Far more importantly though (because netizens are never important), this video was also my first exposure to Rania.

You say "hnnnngh", I say "haeeeein"

I don't mind admitting it - I liked Gangkiz.  The "Lovey Dovey" rip off "Honey Honey" was great, and the spaghetti western-influenced "Mama" was even better - it actually captured underrated pop/soundtrack producer Ennio Morricone's melodic and harmonic choices instead of just lifting his most well-known sound effects and square-pegging them into the round hole of k-pop melody, rhythm and harmony (most recent example of the latter: BEG's "Kill Bill").  Sure, they were just a bunch of models, they sunk like a stone commercially, their CEO is nuts, but like I give a fuck about any of that stuff if the songs are this good.  All that other shit is their problem, not mine.  Maybe no-one else bought that "Mama" mini-album but I SURE DID (ask me to show you on the stream next weekend, you know you want to), and I was sad when most of the members then (understandably) flew the coop.

Oh look, I just typed out a whole paragraph about Gang Kiz without mentioning Haein's boobs.  What was I thinking.

JongKey? Try JongTomi!

Two months ago an interesting image crossed my path on some news sites that didn't seem to make much of a ripple in the world of k-pop, but which certainly caught my personal attention a great deal.

Jonghyun from SHINee being wished a happy birthday with a love message from Japanese AV star Hitomi Tanaka.  How did barely anyone even notice this?

Lee Seung Gi Grabs the Bae Suzy

How anyone thought Suzy could pretend to be a boy, let alone think giving her another prominent drama role was a good idea, is beyond me. I mean come on, her face isn't mannish, she's very attractive in the traditional feminine sense, and she's not built like a beanpole. 

Whatever the logic is, Lee Seung Gi still manages to get to second base in one of the latest episodes of whatever  shit they're starring in at the moment.

HOW IS THAT AT ALL BOYISH?

Taeyeon's Cleavage Scares Me (and SONEs)

Before today, I had no idea that gazing into Taeyeon's cleavage (or lack thereof) was a horrifying experience. We all know she's got the body of a prepubescent girl, so I was kinda surprised her mosquito bites actually had some substance to them.

G.NA Brings Her Girls Out

GNA's going to make a comeback soon, and I am very interested. She gets a bad rep around here for being an alien-faced bigtitty bitch, but I think she's got the potential to look hot. Check out the latest teaser pic, for instance.

Click to EXPAND

Mo' Titties, Mo' Problems

I'm starting to sound like a broken record here, but I have to stand up for the rights of titties everywhere. When people just continue to poop on any well-endowed girl who dares expose her cleavage in front of a camera, I get really mad. Yadda yadda jealous fatties, yadda yadda unfair, yadda yadda titties are good doe, you know the drill.  Latest victim?

Clara. She's an actress if you didn't know.

Ailee's Titties Not Fooling Any Netizens

I feel like I've written about this subject many many times now, but it never fails to boggle my mind how inconsistent netizens of all stripes and colors can be about boobies. They're wonderful. They contain the magical power to hypnotize men (and other women if they're so inclined) and infuriate women (and prudish men), but it seems these days either people are getting more adept at seeing through the illusions woven by a good push-up bra or the women wearing said bras are going too HAM with the antigravity.

This edition? Ailee.

How Can You Hate on Titties?

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